Please don't take this too seriously.

[Sava]

well yeah

it's called biology

one misplaced gene and you're a chimp

maybe more than one

but still

[Lorizael]

Chimps have a whole extra pair of chomosomes we don't have.

[Sava]

see

one extra chromosome and you're a chimp

[Lorizael]

[Lorizael]

just got an emial reminder from my therapist about my appointment tomorrow. she thinks we're going to talk abouit my progress with last weeks goals, which included better managing my time (especially during the weekend) and trying to be friendly with the couple of classmates who have tried to befriend me. but no, we're gonna tlak about the act that every month or so, when my drugs run out, i feel like i stop being me for about a week utnil i get a refill, and how this makes me feel like i am no one and at all and especially not someone who has been growing and changing for the last several years. she says i can email/call her at any time if osmething come sup that is bithering me, because it's her job, except tha tit isnt'. her job is to be my therapist for an horu every other week. i know this, because at the end of every hour i give her $130. i don't pay her at any other time, so she's not working for me at any other time, and the idea of asking her to help me at any other time means i'm bothering her and intruding on the rest of her life because im'm a pathetic sack of **** who can't even go two weeks without needing therapy and can't even go a week without pumping myself full of chemicals thart are, apparently, the only things responsible fro me being me.

[Sava]

i'm pretty sure the business relationship is considered "ongoing"

[Ben Kenobi]

Yeah, drugs ran out earlier this week. I'll get them refilled tomorrow. But holy ****wads. How do I so consistently fail to be a working human whenever I stop taking my medicine. how can i have any respect for myself if i'm 200 lbs of stinking **** hiding behind 150 mg of sertraline.

Sick people need their medicine. Diabetics need theirs. This is no different. And I'm speaking as someone who is on antidepressants as well.

[Lorizael]

i'm pretty sure the business relationship is considered "ongoing"

Oh, I've had this conversation with her. She's assured me in no uncertain terms that I'm her patient at all times and not just when I'm in her office. But I still "know" that I'd be intruding into her life if I were to try to contact her at other times, no matter how pleasant and professional she might appear were I to do so. ****, I rarely ever even go to my friends when I need help because I don't want to intrude on their lives.

[Lorizael]

My dumb as **** job involves cutting lengths of ribbon that I attach to certificates to make them look all official-like. You know that sensation you get in a body part when you need to scratch it? Almost like that body parts wants to be scratched and is telling you so? I can feel that in my right thigh right now, except it doesn't want me to scratch it. it wants me to jam the pair of scissors i'm using to cut the ribbons deep into it. funny thing for your leg to want you to do. i'm not going to, do. because hten id splatter blood over several thousand dollarsworth of certificates, and id have to remake them. which would be a ****ing pain. haha. also, i dont really want to do that. that;s not the kind of the thing i like to do. but for some rweason, my right rhigh really wants it right now. maybe i should just scratch it.

[Lorizael]

Dropped an airbill on the floor. Almost trashed the office in frustration. Man, i'm prett ****ed up today. this is pretty cool. and i hvae alot of work left to do before i can leave. then i have to do linguistics homeowrk when i get home. fuuuuuuuuuck.

[Sava]

Oh, I've had this conversation with her. She's assured me in no uncertain terms that I'm her patient at all times and not just when I'm in her office. But I still "know" that I'd be intruding into her life if I were to try to contact her at other times, no matter how pleasant and professional she might appear were I to do so. ****, I rarely ever even go to my friends when I need help because I don't want to intrude on their lives.

I mean, she's getting paid.

[Sava]

Dropped an airbill on the floor. Almost trashed the office in frustration. Man, i'm prett ****ed up today. this is pretty cool. and i hvae alot of work left to do before i can leave. then i have to do linguistics homeowrk when i get home. fuuuuuuuuuck.

if it makes you feel better, i'm low on weed

[Lorizael]

sonofa*****. just realized i've been doing stuff due tomorrow today instead of the stuff due today. sone of a mother****ing **** eating **** whore goddammit **** balls ****. don't think that sctring of curse words actually comes out to something meaningful. ****. **** ****. neede somethign to punch.

[Sava]

are you sure that story about your brother freaking out at the mall wasn't about you?

[Lorizael]

computer just started giving me an error that means i cant print **** out that needs to be mailed out with the certificates today. jesus ****ing christ. holy **** **** hell. what the fuclk. what the bloody ****. glad im tyhe only one left in the office this late. because i',m laughing and crying at the same time. and crsing.