The Corrupt wish game

[Q Classic]

once it's redefined that 0 + 1 = 0, all basic notions of causality and existence go out the window.

[Q Classic]

congratulations. now there are only two directions. having been forced into a 2-d world that moves only along grids similar to the cartesian plane, your brain rebels and folds in upon itself.

i wish that everybody would realize that happiness is a healthy dose of pharmaceuticals.

[Enigma_Nova]

Actually the only mathematical solution for a direction perpendicular to itself is a point which thus has no direction...

Everybody realises that happiness is now a dose of pharmaceuticals. Quickly running out of drugs, the world becomes a joyless place
(And I'm the only folk I know that's okay with such a world...)

I wish that every idea were synonymous to both its antethesis and its synthesis.

[Ben Kenobi]

Poof!

Hegel falls under the spell of a lovely lady and decides to become a painter. He never writes about his dialectic, and the terms 'antithesis, thesis and synthesis lose their meaning.

I wish for the Democrats to elect Kucinich as the compromise candidate, thus resulting in the complete destruction of the democratic part in the US.

[Q Classic]

poof! that's done. however, in the vacuum that is created, reverend moon takes over the republican party and destroys that party in the us.

i wish that i was the kwisatz haderach.

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted: You are Kwisatz Haderach, but you find out the sand worm aliens that you wrote about aren't science fiction and they are pissed at you for getting their history wrong. They eat you.

I wish that I could think of a good tagline.

[Vlad Antlerkov]

Granted. Your tagline happens to be "Wenn ist das Nunstrück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! .. Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!" You die upon reading it.

I wish the subjunctive would stay in use.

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted. Truth be told, the subjunctive is the only allowed method of communication. Suffice it to say, many english students beat you to death.

I wish I knew what "Wenn ist das Nunstrück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! .. Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!" meant

[Kuciwalker]

Granted. It turns out to be the Worlds Funnies Joke (a la Monty Python) and you die of laughter.

I wish I was a mod.

[Frozzy]

Granted. You get fired after one day.

I wish people would join the Apolyton Pub Quiz Championships

[Nubclear]

You are Unfortunately you take up too much space and your deleted shortly after.

I wish I was married to reverend moon

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted. But your relationship is a mess because you are always handing out flowers at airports. You get divorced, descend into deep sadness, and commit suicide.

I wish i could send everyone on the earth to the moon.

[Nubclear]

You can and you do. However unfortunately you also send yourself and humanity dies a painful death.

I wish all the farm animals would vote for Kuchinichichihchihcih.

[Ben Kenobi]

Granted! They start with you.

I wish that today were tomorrow, and that tomorrow would be yesterday.

[Kuciwalker]

Granted. You repeat yesterday, today, and tomorrow endlessly.

I wish that this was not a crosspost

EDIT: nice, it isn't