I suck at flirting.

[Solly]

This is like the blind leading the blind

[monolith94]

I love flirting, it's such a fine art! I attribute my ease with speaking to the opposite sex to many years of drama class in which I was the only boy.

[Jon Miller]

I am terrible at flirting also

Jon Miller

[alva]

If they say no, don't immediately ask one of their friends out though. You have to give it some time to "realise you asked the wrong friend out". Otherwise it just looks like Plan A failed so you are moving to Plan B.

Sounds like someone with experience in the this matter.

[Provost Harrison]

Oh I don't find flirting particularly difficult (I can do it despite what Stew will try and tell you), but it is just capitalising on the situation which can prove to be tricky

[Provost Harrison]

Stew couldn't flirt in a red light district with wads of money, so just ignore him

[rah]

Yep, ming's right. Unfortunately most men don't figure it out until they're married and it's not quite as necessary.

But once the pressure is off, they find out how easy it is and kick themselves.

I wish I could go back and advise my younger self.

[Solly]

You see it too mechanical and mathematical Rich. You don't "capitalise on the situation" at all.

Can't get your tongue round the words "what's your number we'll go for a drink some time"?

[Provost Harrison]

Does not compute

[Gatekeeper]

I have to admit that I'm attracted to one of the photographers at work. She has a fiery spirit and attitude that draws me to her. Now I just have to work up the courage to ask for her hand in marriage, er, a date.

Gatekeeper

[alva]

Yep, ming's right. Unfortunately most men don't figure it out until they're married and it's not quite as necessary.

But once the pressure is off, they find out how easy it is and kick themselves.

I wish I could go back and advise my younger self.

You could even take this further, the moment you're seeing someone, you seem to attrack women from all over the place.

A bit like buses, first you wait 30m for one, then there's 7 at once

[Solly]

The best way to getting with a female (long term) is actually having "the date" there and then. No planning, no "three day rule" bollocks, no pre-match nerves, just you two sitting down and having lunch because there's no spare tables anywhere, or maybe because there is no-one else in the canteen. Everyone likes company.

And Rah touched on it, a lot of you in this thread seem to think it's some big serious thing. It's not. It's just a game, for at least the first four times you go out. Play. See other people, don't make her your priority until she makes you hers...

[Az]

I am great at talking to the opposite sex. But those girls that I know, I can't date because either they're taken or I am too good a friend to date them. In the dating area, I am the mix between an intellectual whore and the elephant man.

[Japher]

I am good at picking up women, though my wife hates it... It is probably my sarcastic charm, stunning good lucks, and total man hunkiness that attracts them...

However, I have a knack at becoming the center of attention, I have a commanding presence, what can I say. I make 'em laugh to pick 'em up, then I slowly reel them in until they are hanging on to every word I say, then I make my move.

I never really go into it expecting to make a date (and since I got married rarely do ) I start a conversation to be their friend, or just to have someone to talk to, or to meet someone new. I just chat, no obligations, no worries, no intent... Yet, when it seems that they are starting to get into me, then I will make a move. I get rejected a lot too, but most of the time they take me up on my offers...

My advice, don't flirt, don't pick up on anyone, don't try to be suave... They can see right through this, and if they aren't interested nothing you can do will change that. Yet, if you get to know them and they may start to like you, and that could lead to the sack, uh, I mean a date... If not, then at least you have a new friend...

[Ben Kenobi]

didn't want a rejection to ruin the mood between us, or among the group of friends.

Anyone I'm going to ask out will be a good friend of mine, since I like to know them well before asking.

Therefore, I have something to lose by rejection, a friendship. So before asking I always ask myself if the risk is worth the reward.

Secondly, if they say no, and you are still friends, it's quite awkward afterwards.

My problem is not the flirting, but trying to get past the 'let's just be friends' stage.