You've Been Invited to Her Place...

[notyoueither]

kid and nye - let's have a look at this.

this is kid's statement:



is clearly saying that women are raped because either a) they get drunk (the women's fault), or b) 'feminists' (some other women's fault). nowhere is the rapist mentioned. it's pretty clear that kid is just attacking his favourite target: feminists, with a thin veneer of concern for women. he's not fooling anyone.

on the subject of advice, as i said at the start of the thread, there is nothing wrong with sensible advice. however, the problem is that all too often people cross the line from giving advice to blaming the victim. a lot of time is spent talking about what the victim could or should have done, and this shifts the focus away from the attacker.

Problem is that some are trying to supress discussion of what women should do or avoid doing for their own safety. My concern is that some young women are behaving with less care than they should and unwittingly putting themselves in the cross hairs of men who would rape them.

Of course there'd be no rape without the rapist. Duh! That said, I would want my sister and nieces to avoid being in danger around the fvcktards to begin with.

As someone mentioned earlier, walk into a large enough pub and there're likely 2 or 3 potential rapists present. What should women do about it?

[notyoueither]

It was not my intent to imply that.
I was trying to make the point that women getting drunk does not absolve frat boys if a rape occurs.
But you are correct. I could have made the same point without using the term frat boy.
Women drinking does not absolve ANY man if a rape occurs.

Of course not. No one is suggesting it does.

[Kidlicious]

I don't get this. It's not cool to generalize. You are basically saying all frat boys should be treated like potential rapists... and women are to blame for being raped.

blaming the victim

If 1 in 5 women are sexually assaulted in college (which is horse**** stat) and the vast majority of these crimes are committed by drunk frat boys on drunk college girls, and if you don't want all those girls raped you damn well better tell women not to get drunk with frat boys. But maybe you have another agenda, eh?

[molly bloom]

They also did things that made it more likely they'd run into a rapist.

What, like leave the house and go to college ?

[notyoueither]

No, like get ****-faced when alone in an environment teaming with sharks.

FFS, I'm a 6'3" decently built man. There are places I don't go and things I don't do if I want to avoid getting into fights.

You have to govern yourself to avoid problems or yup!, you'll find them more frequently than otherwise.

[molly bloom]

No, like get ****-faced when alone in an environment teaming with sharks.

FFS, I'm a 6'3" decently built man. There are places I don't go and things I don't do if I want to avoid getting into fights.

Fights and rapes are two different things.

[notyoueither]

They're similar in that if I want to avoid them, I do, I have to manage my own behaviour and go so far as to avoid certain environments entirely. Like bars late at night when I am alone.

[kentonio]

No, like get ****-faced when alone in an environment teaming with sharks.

FFS, I'm a 6'3" decently built man. There are places I don't go and things I don't do if I want to avoid getting into fights.

You have to govern yourself to avoid problems or yup!, you'll find them more frequently than otherwise.

So basically women shouldn't do high risk things like drinking around males? That should be the preserve strictly of the dominant male gender right? Because otherwise women are kind of bringing it on themselves what with males being natural predators?

[AAAAAAAAH!]

So basically women shouldn't do high risk things like drinking around males? That should be the preserve strictly of the dominant male gender right? Because otherwise women are kind of bringing it on themselves what with males being natural predators?

No one thinks people who leave their doors unlocked deserve to be burglarized, yet it's still a sensible thing to do and doesn't require the assumption that all people are natural thieves.

[rah]

As long as you don't blame the women for being raped.
But common sense is common sense. I'm sure everyone makes decisions every day that minimize risk. So yes, everyone should make better decisions sometimes.
Someone can be stupid about something and it still not be their fault.

[notyoueither]

So basically women shouldn't do high risk things like drinking around males? That should be the preserve strictly of the dominant male gender right? Because otherwise women are kind of bringing it on themselves what with males being natural predators?

Feel free to read a subsequent post to debunk your own strawman.

As long as you don't blame the women for being raped.
But common sense is common sense. I'm sure everyone makes decisions every day that minimize risk. So yes, everyone should make better decisions sometimes.
Someone can be stupid about something and it still not be their fault.

Of course it's not her fault she got raped. Nobody is suggesting it is in this thread.

[notyoueither]

This deserves a better answer.

So basically women shouldn't do high risk things like drinking around males?

Strawman

That should be the preserve strictly of the dominant male gender right?

Strawman

Because otherwise women are kind of bringing it on themselves what with males being natural predators?

Strawman, but...

No woman is bringing it on herself when she gets raped, nor do the men who are raped do so. Just an aside, recently met a woman whose son was raped and strangled a few years ago. Gender didn't matter much to her loss.

Neither genders are natural predators so far as this discussion is concerned. There are men and women who are predatory in their sexual habits. You yourself (I think it was you) observed that based on stats a woman walking into a large enough pub would be in the presense of 2 or 3 rapists. Would you advise her to avoid drinking excessively while alone in that environment?

[self biased]

it appears that what the argument is really about is where to draw the line between encouraging responsible behavior and victim blaming.

[notyoueither]

Pretty much. A cop telling young women how to avoid bad situations is promoting personal safety. A cop telling young women not to dress like sluts is victim blaming.

[Ben Kenobi]

I don't see why telling a young woman to avoid drinking to the point of insensibility and sticking to her limits is a controversial thing to say.