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[Ben Kenobi]

You're fudging the question. Would you, or would you not tell a child not to talk to such people?

I think you need a humour injection, whaleboy.

[Mrs. Tuberski]

Originally posted by Whaleboy


You're fudging the question. Would you, or would you not tell a child not to talk to such people?

I said i will not allow any adult male in a teen chat room to speak to my children unless this person is the moderator of that room and can prove it. I for one dont see the need for an adult in chat rooms to be chatting with teens. What part of english am i not speaking here

[Mrs. Tuberski]

Originally posted by Whaleboy


If he wouldn't hit you then why mention it?

I would never hit my own mother because I love her dearly, she'd do anything for me even though she's ill and in constant pain, and because I find it abhorrent to hit a woman. If any of those things don't apply to your relationship to your son, then I would still suggest seeking help.

If you recall this thread wasnt about me!!
WB my kids and I have a great relationship. I never said a word to make anyone think otherwise and to be frank i dont need pro help. I hope to think you have not been living in a bubble to know that this type of parent abuse does not happen if you want to stick ur head inthe clouds then do so. Because you dont do it doesnt mean it doesnt happen

[Whaleboy]

I'm sure. And I'm also sure that what you consider appropriate 'tutoring' is rather more broad than most.

There is a difference between advocating sexual freedoms as I do, and advocating child abuse. For young men in particular who may lack a male role model which is unfortunately common in today's society thanks to the breakdown of many marriages, it an be a constructive relationship. Simply talking to older people who know a lot more about life than one is rarely a bad idea. That is what I mean by tutoring, not an advocation for "Whaleboy's Gay Sex Academy".

I can't see how restricting a kid from chatting with adult males on the internet is going to render them incapable of making decisions for themselves.

In itself, it wont. If you give a child the means to do something and forbid them to do it, it's hardly a good thing (see Genesis ). Your options are either remove the means, or educate them into making the better choice. As a symptom of an approach in parenting, the "you can't do this" is imo quite destructive. "Here's how to do this instead" and "You won't do this" are much better as carrot and stick.

[Whaleboy]

I think you need a humour injection, whaleboy

Why? I'm not going to get any sex out of it

I said i will not allow any adult male in a teen chat room to speak to my children unless this person is the moderator of that room and can prove it. I for one dont see the need for an adult in chat rooms to be chatting with teens. What part of english am i not speaking here

Well again you're assuming a teens-only chat room... in a general chat room I should imagine the presumption is that anyone can talk to anyone on the understanding that no-one is taking advantage of anyone.

Because you dont do it doesnt mean it doesnt happen

Where was anything to the contrary being suggested?

[Ben Kenobi]

There is a difference between advocating sexual freedoms as I do, and advocating child abuse. For young men in particular who may lack a male role model which is unfortunately common in today's society thanks to the breakdown of many marriages, it an be a constructive relationship. Simply talking to older people who know a lot more about life than one is rarely a bad idea. That is what I mean by tutoring, not an advocation for "Whaleboy's Gay Sex Academy".

Great, find that male role model for your kids. But why does it have to be online and on a chat room? I would think it much better for this sort of thing to find a family member, or family friend who knows the kid very well to play this role.

As for an advocate for those folks who 'know a lot more' than the kids, what can they teach the kids on a chat line that cannot be taught by a trusted family member? You may have scruples, but the same cannot be said for some of the predators that look out for these young kids.

In itself, it wont. If you give a child the means to do something and forbid them to do it, it's hardly a good thing

Why? Self restraint is one of the most important lessons for anyone, and an essential skill for folks when they grow up and have the ability to do these things. The kids need to learn how to say no to certain things even though they know they can do them, because of the negative consequences.

The only way to test these things is to give the kids the ability to do these things, and see how they respond.

[Mrs. Tuberski]

Well again you're assuming a teens-only chat room... in a general chat room I should imagine the presumption is that anyone can talk to anyone on the understanding that no-one is taking advantage of anyone.

What I am assuming that when the title of the chat room says "TEEN CHAT" That is exactly what that means I dont think anyone over the age of 19 qualifes as a teen.

[Ted Striker]

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[Whaleboy]

Great, find that male role model for your kids. But why does it have to be online and on a chat room? I would think it much better for this sort of thing to find a family member, or family friend who knows the kid very well to play this role.

If you're suggesting that real-world interaction is better than online interactions you'll find no argument from me. Often however it's not possible. In the UK, many suburban communities are a contradiction in terms... families are isolated from one another, male role models are lazy, depressed sloths who, when not working 38 hours a week spend most of the rest of the time watching TV with beer and pizza. You stand a much better chance of meeting someone a little more successful on the internet, just as you put yourself at greater risk by doing so. The way to have your cake and eat it would be to educate the child in the risks.

As for an advocate for those folks who 'know a lot more' than the kids, what can they teach the kids on a chat line that cannot be taught by a trusted family member?

But where this trusted family member does not exist? I would like to say that I'm speaking hypothetically, and I dont know about where you live, but unfortunately here there are many kids who would do a lot better if their parents were thrown into the North Sea.

Why? Self restraint is one of the most important lessons for anyone, and an essential skill for folks when they grow up and have the ability to do these things. The kids need to learn how to say no to certain things even though they know they can do them, because of the negative consequences.

You've clearly never been in a position where you've had to look after kids for a long time? Self-restraint is one thing in an adult, it's quite different in a child, particularly adolescents who are predisposed to testing boundaries and wishful thinking Catholic sexual ethics will simply not hold up in the real world as an applicable solution. My approach would be to warn my brothers and if I find that they hadn't heeded my warnings, I'd either remove the computer or tell my parents who would do that themselves. It's an approach that has been successful in the past such as avoiding dodgy areas in this town.

What I am assuming that when the title of the chat room says "TEEN CHAT" That is exactly what that means I dont think anyone over the age of 19 qualifes as a teen.

Then you've moved the goal posts since nowhere has there been any indication accordingly... and as I said earlier, what has been said in this particular case indicates a general forum. Again as I said earlier, if in a teen chatroom an adult appears, then there's obvious cause for alarm, but then the adult will most likely pose as a teenager.

It would make no sense to pose your argument if you were referring to a teen forum of course, since your statement that you would not allow your kids to speak to older men online would be nonsensical unless you were referring to a general forum, as the rest of us are.

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I'd hit it

[Ted Striker]

[Mrs. Tuberski]

Originally posted by Ted Striker
I want to be a Cam whore

ted dont sell ur self short, you already are and u know it

[Ted Striker]

You're right Mrs. T.

[Mrs. Tuberski]

Wb no where has it been stated it was a forum or a teen chat these are all assumptions with the child in question in this thread. I do not know of a lot of forums that teens can go to, and to be honest a chat room is a bit more lax then a forum. Once again I said i will not allow them to speak to a adult male in a chat room a forum is a lot different the the chat rooms regardless if you agree with me or not.

[Ben Kenobi]

it's quite different in a child, particularly adolescents who are predisposed to testing boundaries and wishful thinking Catholic sexual ethics will simply not hold up in the real world as an applicable solution.

Where did I say anything about Catholic sexual ethics? I didn't know you were so hung up on that Whaleboy.

[Whaleboy]

Wb no where has it been stated it was a forum or a teen chat these are all assumptions with the child in question in this thread. I do not know of a lot of forums that teens can go to, and to be honest a chat room is a bit more lax then a forum. Once again I said i will not allow them to speak to a adult male in a chat room a forum is a lot different the the chat rooms regardless if you agree with me or not.

My bad, I haven't used chatrooms for quite a while, by forum, I meant chatrooms.

Your post implies that you would not allow your kids to talk to adults in a forum where adult-teen contact is the norm, in which case please see the rest of my argument.

Where did I say anything about Catholic sexual ethics? I didn't know you were so hung up on that Whaleboy

Catholics who aren't sluts f*ck me off. Catholic (indeed Christian, but in fairness to the Vatican fanboys they're somewhat less perverse than the fundie Christians) sexual ethics depend very much upon this weird notion of restraint in the expectation of something higher or better, I can see the same logic behind your argument here.