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A good friend of mine is dating a woman whom i was previously involved with. i told them that i wasn't really cool with that, despite getting involved with someone else (whom i'm completely smitten with). It not only has opened some rather well salted wounds and memories relating to my ex wife, but also makes me feel like they don't value my friendship. they knew without a doubt that i would have a problem with them dating, whether valid or not, yet they've gone through with it. they are also of the opinion that i should not only be okay with their union but happy for them; sometimes belligerently so. I mean, I don't wish them ill or anything, and i recognize that a) love is a good thing, and b) that they're probably a better match than she and I ever were. meanwhile, i'm feeling rather betrayed in all of this. I'm contemplating if there's really any merit in maintaining these friendships when i have such a difficult time coping with my hurt feelings with regard to the subject.
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26Totally ****ed up7.69%2Mostly ****ed up38.46%10not very ****ed up34.62%9not ****ed up at all7.69%2not ****ed up, but banana'd up11.54%3Last edited by self biased; December 8, 2012, 22:32.I wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil] -
I'd say it depends on a variety of factors--how long the previous relationship lasted, the nature of the break-up, how big her tits are, etc."My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
"The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund Freud -
five months, amicable but under what could be seen as somewhat suspicious circumstances, and 36 DD.I wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]Comment
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Wait, you entered a relationship with, married, and divorced a woman over a five month period?Comment
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5 months? You're a fat loser. Get out more.Comment
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SB, your feelings are natural, but they aren't really helping you right now. You've got a good lady who presumably gives you more than your ex ever did. Enjoy your time with your new lady, and forget about the ex. I've had that happen to me, but I didn't have a new gal at the time.
Just tell them that you wish the best of them, and ask them if they'd be interested in a foursome. Problem solved.Scouse Git (2) La Fayette Adam Smith Solomwi and Loinburger will not be forgotten.
"Remember the night we broke the windows in this old house? This is what I wished for..."
2015 APOLYTON FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPION!Comment
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no. my ex wife and i split the summer of 2010 (which you weren't around for) and she left me for a bald guy with no chin. i started dating the other woman in november of last year, and we split up in april.Originally posted by regexcellent View PostI wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]Comment
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Hmmm... five months is a length of time that could go either way, and "somewhat suspicious circumstances" also muddies the waters. No right or wrong answer here. I can see their perspective, and yours. Since there is no right or wrong answer, I think you have to do whatever it is you think will make things the best for you in the long run, regardless of whatever would be best for them.
Excellent tits."My nation is the world, and my religion is to do good." --Thomas Paine
"The subject of onanism is inexhaustable." --Sigmund FreudComment
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i couldn't give a civ 5 less if she had started ****ing the entire new england patriots' entire roster. the bone of contention is that my friends apparently decided my feelings weren't important.Originally posted by Wiglaf View PostI wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]Comment
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she even admitted that them getting together looked okay by the calendar but still felt sketchy. they were nice tits too, but i'm not missing anything comparatively speaking.Originally posted by Guynemer View PostI wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]Comment
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WTF
Are you saying that you should have any kind of influence on your friends and your exgirlfriends life ????
Forget it, that isn't your business.With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
Steven WeinbergComment
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it really isn't any of my business, so we agree on that. I really don't care to hash out all the particulars here on 'poly. i did make it clear to them that my feelings would be tremendously hurt by them getting together. whether i am right or wrong in this is irrelevant. were it not for me, they would both be ignorant of each other's existence. it hurts that the coin which they purchased their relationship was quite possibly my friendship.
it's really no secret that dating a friend's ex is usually a poor idea to begin with, especially a few weeks after the breakup. if it were a few years down the line, it would be different; if it were a few weeks but someone who wasn't my friend, it would be different; i could pretty easily rationalize that.
but why would i want to put myself in a position where i have to relive painful memories for the sake of someone else's happiness?I wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
[Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]Comment
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True, your feelings may be hurt, but that really doesn't matter a bit. You still can't have a say on other peoples life.With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
Steven WeinbergComment
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I can't say I have much experience with this, so I understand if you ignore my opinion entirely. But if they're happy together, it just doesn't seem fair for you to tell them you don't approve.If there is no sound in space, how come you can hear the lasers?
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