Dating a Friend's ex

[SlowwHand]

Let's put this succinctly, she's his problem now.

[Bugs ****ing Bunny]

A good friend, who will help you out when times are hard, is hard to find- and it gets harder to find them as you get older. Are your hurt feelings over this budding relationship really worth blowing that for?

It might also be seen as a sign that you're not over the defunct relationship, and you might want to be cautious over how Tiffy takes that.

[MichaeltheGreat]

Pretty straightforward, really:

You can say anything to them you want. They're of course free to disregard it, which they would anyway.
Reality is, it's not your business - operative word here being "ex"
Further reality is, if you don't feel like associating with your "friend" that's totally your prerogative.

Overall, not really worth you giving much time or energy.

[MikeH]

I don't think it's really fair for you to try and stop a happy couple from being together because it hurts your feelings. If this is a good friend I suspect he didn't take the decision to date your ex lightly, and yet there was some connection and it happened.

You've also moved on.

[dannubis]

Well, obviously he didn't.

Anyway, they have made their decision, you can make yours.

I once didn't see my best friend for 2 years because his brother started dating my ex. Too much painful memories. I told him that and he was fine with it. Still my best friend today.

[Kidlicious]

My intuition tells me that she still has feelings for you. She wants to know if you still have feelings for her, and what other way than to start dating your best friend. I would walk away, because you don't want a women like that. And as far as your friend goes, things won't ever be the same between the two of you, even if he helped you through a tuff time, and he knows that going forward.

[Az]

Pretty straightforward, really:

You can say anything to them you want. They're of course free to disregard it, which they would anyway.
Reality is, it's not your business - operative word here being "ex"
Further reality is, if you don't feel like associating with your "friend" that's totally your prerogative.

Overall, not really worth you giving much time or energy.

Hey Mike!!!

[Imran Siddiqui]

I don't understand why people think self biased is trying to have his friend end his relationship with his ex. That's not what I'm getting at all. Self is upset at his friend for dating his ex and wondering if he should distance himself from the friendship (due to the bringing up of old wounds and such) - not try to force his friend to break up with the ex. After all, the horse has left the barn there.

I'd say that, yes, your friend did violate the bro code (mostly ****ed up option) and you are well within your rights to distance from him.

[MichaeltheGreat]

Hey Mike!!!

Hey Az, how's everything?

[Az]

Hey Az, how's everything?

Everything is pretty sweet, actually. Pondering my next career moves at the moment. I still bull**** here from time to time. How have you been?

[MichaeltheGreat]

Oh, I've been up, down, all around. If it got much worse at one point, I'd have started writing country songs, but things are dandy now, except for overwork.

[Supr49er]

If possible, don't socialize with them. If they stay together, you can cut your friend loose. If they break up, you can restart the friendship if you want.

[MRT144]

i couldn't give a civ 5 less if she had started ****ing the entire new england patriots' entire roster. the bone of contention is that my friends apparently decided my feelings weren't important.

Well, to be blunt, they aren't.

[self biased]

Well, to be blunt, they aren't.

QED.

[Imran Siddiqui]

And hence, no reason to continue to persue the friendship. I don't want a friend who thinks my feelings are unimportant.