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  • Why is life so hard?

    This is getting annoying... I have met the girl of my dreams, we both love each other very much. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like it's going to be as easy for us as for most other couples

    Why?
    We are not allowed to get married in Denmark, unless we want to sell an arm and a leg to afford the expenses needed for her to be allowed to stay in Denmark
    If we get married in Germany (where I live now) we don't have to pay that amount of money, but that requires that we are lucky that the German Embassy is kind enough to give her a stay in Germany (law says that she should be allowed as all requirements are fulfilled, but sounds like a lot of people have said that even if it's fulfilled they didn't get allowed to stay)

    But before we can ask the German embassy for her to be allowed to stay Temporary in Germany, we need some of her papers fixed, so the papers are correct. Unfortunately that requires her mother to actually DO what we requested. If she doesn't do that now, my girl wont be allowed to stay in Germany... and from the look of it, that is not going to happen (her mother is just lazy and complaining all the time... but she wants us to get married)

    If she can't be allowed to stay in Germany one of two things can happen:
    1. She moves back home... the other end of the world
    2. She moves to Norway to become an Au Pair

    If she moves back home, then she can fix the papers herself and try from the embassy there to be allowed to stay in Germany... but from the sound of it, that means that I wont see her in 6-12 months from when she moves back home

    If she moves to Norway we can try from there, she'll be closer, but still too far away. Au Pair in Norway is for 2 years, so for two years I'll only see her a few weeks per year at best...at worst I wont see her at all... Depends on her host family, some host families are pure evil
    Also there's no guarantee that she can stay with me after her contract ends


    The law in DK says that dirty old men are allowed to buy wifes (no love needed, only thing needed is money which means that you're probably old too if you have that kind of money)
    Young people in love are not allowed to be together

    This space is empty... or is it?

  • #2
    Move to Canada. The immigration office will be so thrilled that you speak English that they'd even give you $100,000.
    "The issue is there are still many people out there that use religion as a crutch for bigotry and hate. Like Ben."
    Ben Kenobi: "That means I'm doing something right. "

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    • #3
      You have my sympathy. Everyone should be allowed to live wherevr thy have people to vouch for them. In context, where is the "other end of the world?" Why is the only solution moving her rather than you? Do you really think that 6 months to two years of intermittant separation is a long time?
      No matter where you go, there you are. - Buckaroo Banzai
      "I played it [Civilization] for three months and then realised I hadn't done any work. In the end, I had to delete all the saved files and smash the CD." Iain Banks, author

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      • #4
        Do you really think that 6 months to two years of intermittant separation is a long time?


        Hell yes.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Blaupanzer View Post
          You have my sympathy.
          Thanks

          Originally posted by Blaupanzer View Post
          In context, where is the "other end of the world?" Why is the only solution moving her rather than you?
          The Philippines. It probably wont be possible for me to get a job there in my field and two people living on the salary she'll get when living there is not possible. I'm making more money in one month now (after taxes) than she made there in a year

          Originally posted by Blaupanzer View Post
          Do you really think that 6 months to two years of intermittant separation is a long time?
          For young people yes, it's a really long time
          This space is empty... or is it?

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          • #6
            My sympathies Adagio. Wish I had a concrete solution for the both of you.
            Scouse Git (2) La Fayette Adam Smith Solomwi and Loinburger will not be forgotten.
            "Remember the night we broke the windows in this old house? This is what I wished for..."
            2015 APOLYTON FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPION!

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            • #7
              How is Lancer involved in this?
              "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow
              "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

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              • #8
                You're young. Get over it. You'd just end up in divorce anyway.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                • #9
                  I hope you've learned your lesson: don't date a foreigner.
                  KH FOR OWNER!
                  ASHER FOR CEO!!
                  GUYNEMER FOR OT MOD!!!

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by SlowwHand View Post
                    You're young. Get over it. You'd just end up in divorce anyway.

                    Just make sure you get some first.

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                    • #11
                      Ja, this sounds like a Lancer scenario.
                      I'm consitently stupid- Japher
                      I think that opinion in the United States is decidedly different from the rest of the world because we have a free press -- by free, I mean a virgorously presented right wing point of view on the air and available to all.- Ned

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Adagio View Post
                        This is getting annoying... I have met the girl of my dreams, we both love each other very much. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like it's going to be as easy for us as for most other couples

                        Why?
                        We are not allowed to get married in Denmark, unless we want to sell an arm and a leg to afford the expenses needed for her to be allowed to stay in Denmark
                        If we get married in Germany (where I live now) we don't have to pay that amount of money, but that requires that we are lucky that the German Embassy is kind enough to give her a stay in Germany (law says that she should be allowed as all requirements are fulfilled, but sounds like a lot of people have said that even if it's fulfilled they didn't get allowed to stay)

                        But before we can ask the German embassy for her to be allowed to stay Temporary in Germany, we need some of her papers fixed, so the papers are correct. Unfortunately that requires her mother to actually DO what we requested. If she doesn't do that now, my girl wont be allowed to stay in Germany... and from the look of it, that is not going to happen (her mother is just lazy and complaining all the time... but she wants us to get married)

                        If she can't be allowed to stay in Germany one of two things can happen:
                        1. She moves back home... the other end of the world
                        2. She moves to Norway to become an Au Pair

                        If she moves back home, then she can fix the papers herself and try from the embassy there to be allowed to stay in Germany... but from the sound of it, that means that I wont see her in 6-12 months from when she moves back home

                        If she moves to Norway we can try from there, she'll be closer, but still too far away. Au Pair in Norway is for 2 years, so for two years I'll only see her a few weeks per year at best...at worst I wont see her at all... Depends on her host family, some host families are pure evil
                        Also there's no guarantee that she can stay with me after her contract ends


                        The law in DK says that dirty old men are allowed to buy wifes (no love needed, only thing needed is money which means that you're probably old too if you have that kind of money)
                        Young people in love are not allowed to be together

                        The secret to life is how you view it. Yes it can be difficult, but from the other perspective you have met a girl you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. The rest will work itself out. Enjoy the good, there really is a lot of good.

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                        • #13
                          There's also alimony and/or child support. There's the dysfunction of only seeing the children at certain times, and being tied to her in one way or another forever.
                          Oh, yes. There will be children. Look at him over there. He's drooling. You tell me there won't be one in the oven before 3 months pass and we'll have a bet.
                          Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                          "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                          He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            In my personal view, Filipino women are not the most, shall I say, loving. Anyone who has seen a soldier with a Filipino bride knows where my view comes from. Men overseas meet these women; beautiful, young, love to sing even with their god awful voices, loyal, respectful, and age slowly. But in the end they tend to drain the bank account with their constant family traveling or making you dish out to transit her entire family to where you are.

                            Way I see it you both move to Australia. Seriously, try there.
                            "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the Blood of Patriots and tyrants" Thomas Jefferson
                            "I can merely plead that I'm in the presence of a superior being."- KrazyHorse

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                            • #15
                              Can't you just buy her?
                              “As a lifelong member of the Columbia Business School community, I adhere to the principles of truth, integrity, and respect. I will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”
                              "Capitalism ho!"

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