How easily can you get a date with a woman (or man)?

[Jon Miller]

Originally posted by Dis
I need women advice. yes I know about the wisdom of asking for women advice on poly. But I've had a few drinks, so bear with me.

This isn't about my friend. I'm happy with L. being my friend. I wouldn't trade that for the world. ahh who am I kidding, if she offered a bj, I'd take it in a heartbeat. I'm so bad. But seriously, she's such a great friend. I can talk to her about emotional things I could never talk to a guy friend about. I love her. I can't sometimes believe the deep down feelings and secrets I reveal to her.

Now I have this other woman I'm into (actually I've been into her since December). She's a coworker. The problem is she has a boyfriend and 2 kids. But her boyfriend seems like a loser. Sure he's good looking. But I know for a while he didn't have a job (he still might not have a job). And left her alone on christmas to go visit his father in Mexico, I didn't like that. She's mexican as well (actually she's mexican-american- born in the midwest). But I thought I had no shot with her. But some **** happened this weekened that made me believe I do have a shot with her.

I was discussing my new car with another female coworker. But the girl I am interested was standing there as well. I was joking I had nothing else to spend my money on, so I bought the car. then the girl joked that I could spend the money on her. This statement has me going. I figure she was joking. But sometimes people joke, but there's actually an element of truth to it. I've been putting my arm around her lately, and she seems to like that. And she even gave me a little massage yesterday. She told me I was tense. Which I was. It was a tough day at work.

But I'm still not sure what to do about her boyfriend. I always heard it was against the code to go after another guy's girlfriend. But she deserves better. Sure he's better looking than me. But he can't offer her no future. And not to stereotype (okay I am), but he seems like he might be the violent, jealous type. I'm just not sure if I should go for it.

If the girl seems happy, don't try to break up a good thing. But a lot of girls stay with someone, but are looking for someone else. Don't cheat, but persue a bit.

Of course, for the most part don't break up your freinds at all...

Jon Miller

[Sikander]

I've been in a relationship for about 10 years now, but I'm fairly sure that I could get a date. There are a lot of unpursued instances of attraction that build up in that amount of time.

[Playful]

OK female intercepts message.

Start by asking her to lunch. You work with her, you both have to eat. Lend her your ear and let her talk about whatever she wants. Show you are a good listener. Let her know you can be trustworthy and not just a jerk out lookin for a piece of @$$.

Lunch is a start and can be repeated as often as needed if she accepts. Chances are she needs to release some frustrations and she just might start to confide in you if she really feels the desire to leave this boyfriend or not.

You already have the foot in the door if you have shown you are non threatening and a good listener and trust me, you will have gained her attention.

[Odin]

Originally posted by Gibsie


Since you were already taking the heat for it, should've had a crack anyway.

The other girl wasn't even that attractve or nice comped to the gf, which makes the jealousy even more mystifying. My gf just turned from being nice into being a controling b*tch all of a sudden.

[Ben Kenobi]

BTW, why the heck are Yanks here referring to churches as a place to meet girls?

Geez, I didn't know I was a Yank. I've had some success in the past, most of my girlfriends I met at church.

However, it does pay to keep your eyes open elsewhere.

[Flubber]

Originally posted by Sikander
I've been in a relationship for about 10 years now, but I'm fairly sure that I could get a date. There are a lot of unpursued instances of attraction that build up in that amount of time.

I've had those instances too-- times where you know , if circumstances were different, you would be dating.

But generally I think it would be pretty easy for me to start dating -- If I moved to a new town where I knew no one, I would easily get a date in a week (you can get boinked in a night but lets assume you are being more discriminating than picking up a last call girl)

Why would I get a date that quickly? Because I would ask !! My experience is that a good few of those that "can't get a date", have not ASKED anyone lately, or if they had, go for the snobby supermodel type, or the hopelessly in love with someone else girl or the girl they have mooned over for a year in a pathetic puppy kind of way.

Oh and I would be willing to try speed dating or singles events or whatever. My view would be that I can have fun anywhere so just try things out
I'm no dating superstar but it is dead easy to get a date if you care to ask-- and if you get rejected by someone , ask someone else=--- heck ask a "practice girl"-- pick someone that IS NOT your "dream girl" and ask her out and then have a nice time-- Worst case is you work on your dating skills (ie entertaining her)--

edited for my more obvious spelling and typographical errors

[Nostromo]

Why would I get a deat that quickly? Because I would ask !! My experience is that a good few of those that "can't get a date", have not ASKED anyone lately, or if they had, go for the snobby supermodel type, or the hopelessly in love with someone else girl or the girl they have mooned oved for a year in a pthetic puppy kind of way.

Oh and I would be willing to try speed dating or singles events or whatever. My view would be that I can have fun anywhere so just try things out
I'm no dating superstar but it is dead easy to get a date if you care to ask-- and if you get rejected by someone , ask someone else=--- heck ask a "practice girl"-- pick someone that IS NOT your "dream girl" and ask her out and then have a nice time-- Worst case is you work on your dating skills (ie entertaining her)--

QFT

Dis, dating isn't rocket science, you know...

[Jon Miller]

It's true, I haven't even sorta persued a girl recently... and it has been a long time since I asked someone.

JM

[Flubber]

Originally posted by Jon Miller
It's true, I haven't even sorta persued a girl recently... and it has been a long time since I asked someone.

JM

So for you, it CANNOT be said that you CANNOT get a date.

It might be that you have not found anyone that interested you, but that is a different issue. Even then, I recommend dating. Some of the most fun (non-sexual)dates I ever had were with girls that I pretty much knew from the start were not a long-term match. There was no pressure and you could just have fun.

Oh but don't get too set in your prejudgement. You can often find out that they are not what you expect. The girl that you think is NOT for you (before you date) might be the very one you end up married to

[Son of David]

So Dis, you're so desperate you're going after a Mexican woman.

Is this correct?

[Dis]

WTF

are you racist? What is wrong with mexican women? Anyways she was born in the U.S. She's an american. And speaks English with no accent. She grew up in the midwest.

[Flubber]

Originally posted by Dis

What is wrong with mexican women? .

From my humble perspective not a thing. There are many lovely women from Mexico.


As this is a family site I will not elaborate with pointed references to a hot tamale.

[Son of David]

So why did you make a point of 'extolling' the virtues of Mexican women to me on the other thread?

It was you who pointed out your fetish for such women in the first place!

[Flubber]

Originally posted by Dis
What is wrong with mexican women? Anyways she was born in the U.S. She's an american. And speaks English with no accent. She grew up in the midwest.

Too bad-- an accent -- of whatever type can be alluring and exotic on occasion

[Dis]

Originally posted by Flubber



Too bad-- an accent -- of whatever type can be alluring and exotic on occasion

I'm sure she can cue up a sexy accent or two in the bedroom. Now I have to figure out how to get her there...