_____ is reporting on the latest game from Planetside Games. It is a bizzare RPG set in a futuristic Hive base called Hive Complex. The Self Aware Colony, commonly called "The Computer", runs Hive Complex. The Computer wants to have everyone to work . The Computer wants everyone to love each other, Yang and The Computer, to work for the good of the Hive, and kill the enemies of the Hive. Enemies of the Hive are people who spread evil ideas, like Yang is stupid, Greed is good not bad, citizens can rule themselves or life in the Hive is not great. Like everything else in the Hive, The Computer has SERIOUS problems, and needs help from loyal Hive Citizens. This is where you come in. You are a member of Hive Internal Security, and work to help keep Hive Complex working and kill enemies of The Hive. Your role can vary from testing out new gravaton guns (to hillarious effect), helping misguided drones, or even infiltrating enemies of the Hive. The average Internal Security Member has an average lifespan of 2 weekcycles, but don't worry. The cloning vats work around the clock to make sure Hive Complex never runs out of Internal Security Members.
I tried some rounds of this yet to be named game:
For this round, I am an undercover agent.
The Computer: Citizen, you have a new mission for you: help feed the soldiers recovering from battle against the evil PeaceKeepers.
Me: Undercover agents don't know anything about cooking, or feeding people.
The Computer: Citizen, trust your friend computer.
Me: Friend Computer, how do I feed the recovering soldiers?
The Computer: Go to the nearest recycling center.
Me: I don't know what this has to do with food, but ok.
The Computer: Now press the button that says "submit for recycling"
Me: Ok, I pressed the button, now... Oh My God!!! Aaaaahhhhhh!!!!
The Computer: Good work citizen! Your trust lead to a successful mission! Citizen?
For this round I am an undercover agent. I am with a partner and we have returned from investingating a destroyed factory. The evidence suggested a natural mind worm attack.
Partner: The factory ruins really freaked me out.
Me: yeah, it's really freaky to see what those mind worms can do. * I secrety shove a few things into his briefcase *
Partner: You know, if the factory waste was put in barrels, then disposed at sea we wouldn't have to deal with those mind worms.
Me: That's a good idea, we should tell the computer.
* We arrive at base to debrief our superior *
Partner: The factory was destroyed by mind worms.
Me: It was a clever move by the Gaians, to use mind worms to fool us...
Partner: We found no evidence for Gaian involvement in the factory's destruction.
Me: Some Gaian transponders were found on the scene. They appeared to be modified.
Partner: Uhh, we found no such signs. You said nothing about this.
Me: * laughing * What do you mean you don't remember me talking about Gaian terrorism? I talked about it on the entire ride back. You seemed rather quiet and shaken during the conversation.
Partner: What are you talking about.
Me: I'll show you, if you look at this chart * I open my partner's briefcase, and then display dismay *
Superior: What is it? * he looks in the briefcase *
Superior: Gaian transponders? Burst and Encrypted communicator holopones?!?! A book called "Planet Dreams". Maps of the factory's security routes and times?!?! A snack pouch of organic Xenocarrots!?!? A Gaian Mark III personal Fusion Laser?!?! An article from the "Voice of The Planet" citing the Hive as the number one producer of polution on planet and that 'decise action' is necesary?!?! A secret badge similar to those used by the Gaian probe teams?!?!
Me: Acusingly: You are a Gaian agent, aren't you! You got involved in this mission to block the investigation! This is grounds for termination of our cease fire!
Partner: No! This was a normal mind worm attack in response to a poluting...
Me: The Computer says all of our factories generate no polution! A true Hiverian would know that our friend The Computer is never wrong!
Partner: No, err... I mean...
Superior: You're under arrest! You will be escorted to the recycling center to help atone for your evil deeds you spy!
Partner: NOOOOO!!!!!
Superior: That's some good investigative work you did! A promotion is in order.
Me: Thank you friend commander! I can't wait to help our friend The Computer fight the evil in Hive Complex even more!
I tried some rounds of this yet to be named game:
For this round, I am an undercover agent.
The Computer: Citizen, you have a new mission for you: help feed the soldiers recovering from battle against the evil PeaceKeepers.
Me: Undercover agents don't know anything about cooking, or feeding people.
The Computer: Citizen, trust your friend computer.
Me: Friend Computer, how do I feed the recovering soldiers?
The Computer: Go to the nearest recycling center.
Me: I don't know what this has to do with food, but ok.
The Computer: Now press the button that says "submit for recycling"
Me: Ok, I pressed the button, now... Oh My God!!! Aaaaahhhhhh!!!!
The Computer: Good work citizen! Your trust lead to a successful mission! Citizen?
For this round I am an undercover agent. I am with a partner and we have returned from investingating a destroyed factory. The evidence suggested a natural mind worm attack.
Partner: The factory ruins really freaked me out.
Me: yeah, it's really freaky to see what those mind worms can do. * I secrety shove a few things into his briefcase *
Partner: You know, if the factory waste was put in barrels, then disposed at sea we wouldn't have to deal with those mind worms.
Me: That's a good idea, we should tell the computer.
* We arrive at base to debrief our superior *
Partner: The factory was destroyed by mind worms.
Me: It was a clever move by the Gaians, to use mind worms to fool us...
Partner: We found no evidence for Gaian involvement in the factory's destruction.
Me: Some Gaian transponders were found on the scene. They appeared to be modified.
Partner: Uhh, we found no such signs. You said nothing about this.
Me: * laughing * What do you mean you don't remember me talking about Gaian terrorism? I talked about it on the entire ride back. You seemed rather quiet and shaken during the conversation.
Partner: What are you talking about.
Me: I'll show you, if you look at this chart * I open my partner's briefcase, and then display dismay *
Superior: What is it? * he looks in the briefcase *
Superior: Gaian transponders? Burst and Encrypted communicator holopones?!?! A book called "Planet Dreams". Maps of the factory's security routes and times?!?! A snack pouch of organic Xenocarrots!?!? A Gaian Mark III personal Fusion Laser?!?! An article from the "Voice of The Planet" citing the Hive as the number one producer of polution on planet and that 'decise action' is necesary?!?! A secret badge similar to those used by the Gaian probe teams?!?!
Me: Acusingly: You are a Gaian agent, aren't you! You got involved in this mission to block the investigation! This is grounds for termination of our cease fire!
Partner: No! This was a normal mind worm attack in response to a poluting...
Me: The Computer says all of our factories generate no polution! A true Hiverian would know that our friend The Computer is never wrong!
Partner: No, err... I mean...
Superior: You're under arrest! You will be escorted to the recycling center to help atone for your evil deeds you spy!
Partner: NOOOOO!!!!!
Superior: That's some good investigative work you did! A promotion is in order.
Me: Thank you friend commander! I can't wait to help our friend The Computer fight the evil in Hive Complex even more!
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