Please don't take this too seriously.

[N35t0r]

Alby always manages to entertain

His reaction was really really lol. It's like he's never ever been in contact with Lori before. Hell, even I knew it wasn't going to go in that direction (disembodied brain! Called it first! ), and I've got the social skills of a badly trained ferret.

[MOBIUS]

Well, I think part of the problem is that I couldn't tell the difference between what I'm doing and what a predator is doing. They are superficially similar, but that's it. My therapist explained that my behavior is kind of a fledgling attempt to fulfill unmet needs (companionship), and the fact that I do desire companionship and I don't desire to (and am repulsed by the thought of) hurting people exposes that superficiality. If I had no desire for companionship, but I were still engaging in this kind of behavior, then I'd have reason to worry, my therapist said.

Well there you are then, your behaviour is essentially normal...

[Lorizael]

I ain't normal. If I were normal, I'd have a healthy response to unmet needs such as, I dunno, asking girls out on dates.

[MOBIUS]

Christ on a bike! I still find that hard to do myself - it's normal to feel anxious in those sorts of situations!

Besides, you've been successful before, just emulate what you did then.

Go on Match or something, that cuts out the hardest part of dating IMO.

[Lorizael]

I've been successful before, but not in a consistent fashion. My first girlfriend followed me home one day and more or less forced me to kiss her. My second girlfriend was literally delivered to me in a box on my 19th birthday. My third girlfriend--the ex I've been speaking about in this thread--is the only one I can be said to have successfully wooed, but the process took months and she was very close to giving up on me by the time I finally took the plunge.

[rah]

I've been successful before, but not in a consistent fashion.

Welcome to the real world. Most regular guys don't consistently win when it comes to women.

If I had one advice to go back and give a younger version of myself it would be, "go for it, they can only say no"
If you ask enough women you only need to be successful 5% of the time to get all the women you'll ever need.

Don't let their saying **** off be a life ending tragedy.

[Lorizael]

That's not what I mean. I mean that the pattern of my successes is not consistent. There's no particular successful behavior for me to emulate, because how I've succeeded in the past has differed widely.

[rah]

Of course different strats work and sometimes don't. But nothing works if you don't try anything. Success comes from trying and continual trying. The method is not always as important.
I'm not saying you're completely normal, just not as far off as you seem to think.

[MOBIUS]

I've been successful before, but not in a consistent fashion. My first girlfriend followed me home one day and more or less forced me to kiss her. My second girlfriend was literally delivered to me in a box on my 19th birthday. My third girlfriend--the ex I've been speaking about in this thread--is the only one I can be said to have successfully wooed, but the process took months and she was very close to giving up on me by the time I finally took the plunge.

So, this is how I interpret the above statement:

1) You're clearly attractive enough to women for one to want to actively stalk you back to your place and force herself on you

2) Not sure what to make of that, except in my wildest dreams I've never had a girlfriend literally ritually offered to me on my birthday! Best I managed was my mum getting me a stripper for my 18th...

3) She was clearly into you so much that she actually did stick around long enough for you to 'finally take the plunge' - does this mean that you currently have a 100% success rate in asking girls out...!!?

Basically you're winning on all fronts here - WTF is your problem!?

Like I said, try a dating site. It takes out any guesswork and there's bound to be a site that suits you. For me it was Match. She's moving in next month!

Do as rah says and get back out there!

[MOBIUS]

Of course different strats work and sometimes don't. But nothing works if you don't try anything. Success comes from trying and continual trying. The method is not always as important.

And failure is from not doing anything at all. So break out of your self-fulfilling prophecy and start trying again.

I'm not saying you're completely normal, just not as far off as you seem to think.

Amen to that!

[Lorizael]

That's certainly one interpretation of my dating history...

I've tried dating sites before with no success to speak of. Doesn't mean it won't work in the future, but it requires a great deal of perseverance.

[rah]

Life requires perseverance.

[Lorizael]

I know. That's why I haven't done too well at it so far.

[MOBIUS]

Well, you're still alive and have been for a pretty long time. Don't be so hard on yourself...

[Bereta_Eder]

That's not what I mean. I mean that the pattern of my successes is not consistent. There's no particular successful behavior for me to emulate, because how I've succeeded in the past has differed widely.

That's just because each girl is different.
Having some sort of confidence always pays off as does really liking the girl (then you don't have to lie about anything ; )

Just got back from holidays and have to say it's a wonderful world out there that sometime it will extinguish like a candle because you'll die. (as everyone).

It's hard, impossible to savour just how amazing life and the world is staying confined to the four walls of an appartment.