Please don't take this too seriously.

[The Mad Monk]

Sonny Bono, Al Frankin, every Kennedy ever.

[DaShi]

I'll be in Congress one day

I'd vote for you, Alpert.

[Bereta_Eder]

Well therapy is one thing.
Personaly (one year psychoanalytical. CBT has its opposers here. it is catching on but some regard it as short term relief. doesnt solve anything, but i'm sure that's wrong for many cases and the important thing, is to get therapy if you need it) I thought it had its ups and downs.

from one point forward, for me, we were just recycling things. It did help but run its course. (interestically my stress levels were up the roof during said therapy).

then everything can be therapeutic, a hot shower, or simply running/walking intensily in the sun as laz has said.
or a book. plunging yourself in one is one of the most relaxing things i can think of.
not political or economic but novels.

but what's more important I think (maybe after you complete your circle of therapy) is changing of circumstance.
for me a pivotal phase was getting my own place. i studied and lived alone, but it's different to be responsible for your own place, your own life, your own (godamn car that used to run fine when grandma was around and was blessing it - just joking and that i miss her).

Circumstance change I think is very important. I get bouts of stress, only once a while ago they verged on a panic attack but I countered it back with getting outside and walking like a bit of a loonie at 38oC celcius sun. but it worked. i came back to work sweating (but if you wear something of gray color it doesnt show) and drunk a lot of water. and puf, i was feeling better and no more mind playing games with panic attacks.

what's best for you. what works for you.

my main problem IS ALCOHOL. I've said it, I will keep saying it.
But since that awful experience when the cava master gifted me a second bottle of wine (and I couldnt stop drinking and I drunk that too, alone in the house) it banged on me that something needs to be done.
(alcohol for me means, posting in websites like this, aggresive stuff, then falling asleep and lose the next day of work. but i'm not in danger of loosing it, unless I loose it).

so something needed to be done.
something with time schedules, monitoring progress or regress, monitoring always doing that. avoiding that damn boxer against you.

from that dreaful night (when my weelky or bi weekly binge doubled just because of a gift) I try to MONITOR it.
It's been more than a month since then. I never drunk except one night.
So I spend 3 weeks without drinking. then the boxer hit me, then it's now one week without drinking.

BTW this means that if you get the urge (that's in the middle of the week or at friday) YOU DO SOMETHING else.
if that means going to your folks for that night, do that.

i now hate drinking because of one more thing. the next day, my mind is dissoriented. but maybe that's because when this happens I also don't sleep a lot.

I've read that not sleeping enough, gives priority to negative over positive thoughts in your mind. and thoughts DO produce feelings.

nothing can phase me when I've slept enough.
and of course it's always peachy when it's holidays with the SO. my happiest moments of life are there. only there.
that means that something in my reality bugs me (it could be the job or other things) but you have to learn to cope, not waiting for the rain to stop to do something but to learn to dance under it.

now a new week of stress, specially at work and financially is coming.
i wrote that. did that keep me from drinking wine?
yes. that's succesful for me.

oh. and another thing that i want to remember, it's a compass.
so one night alone at home.
hugely stressed.
so i say i'm stressed.
visit 'poly ok, then watch some tv.
hell, i can't sleep.
well, that's OK.
(no, you're not going out to buy alcohol).
stayed at home. still stressed. couldnt sleep.
well, that means that you won't go to work tomorrow. will you lose it? no, you've worked hard and people are pleased with you. you never took one full vacation. you have sick leave days.

now you need to not go to work. you need to not sleep. (and sleep untill the other noon) BUT YOU DON'T need to drink!
and so it happened.

[Lorizael]

One of the big things my therapist has tried to get across to me, paiktis, is that it's okay to screw up sometimes. We're all human and we're all going to stumble and make mistakes from time to time. But making a mistake doesn't mean that everything is falling apart and you're a failure and it's all hopeless (even if it might feel that way). It sounds like you're learning that lesson.

[Al B. Sure!]

Bereta_Elder is paiktis?

[Sava]

Yup. Mind blown, eh?

[self biased]

Bereta_Elder is paiktis?

Did you not get the memo?

[Bereta_Eder]

Thanks Lori.
The thing is that I am in a sort of a dilema and while I was thinking that this type of thinking (failure, or perceived failure on one thing) does not mean catastrophy for me anymore, it seems it percevers.
It has some things to do with your case seeing as in the heart of it is relationships and important facets of it like progeny.
I know I won't find answers here, or anywhere, and it's not something that can be "decided" on the spot.
When the week starts (and the SO returns) the harsh realities of life will take me by the hand and show me where to go and such mooshie thoughts will dissapear (hopefully not in the botom of a glass)

[Lorizael]

I shaved. My life is still terrible.

[Bereta_Eder]

But your "depressed" humour intact

[Sava]

I shaved. My life is still terrible.

At least people still try to convince you that you aren't a failure. That'll stop in a few years.

[Lorizael]

Well, I'm currently paying a professional to tell me I'm not a failure, so...

[The Mad Monk]

No matter how bad it seems, there are people who always have it worse.

This is a twenty-four part documentary on several such people.

[Lorizael]

What's with the hikikomori kick, TMM?

[dannubis]

I shaved. My life is still terrible.

Possible explanation: ugly face
Potential solution: grow beard again