Jokes about the swedish navy

[BlackCat]

How do you sink a Swedish battleship?

- Put it in the water.

Why do the NEW Swedish Navy vessels have glass bottoms?

- To see the old Swedish Navy.

Why does the NATO classify the full Swedish Navy as submarine class?

- All the Swedish vessels are on the bottom of the sea.



Looks like yet another swedish warship sunk by danes heva been found

[Dinner]

Sweden has a navy?

[Kitschum]

It's very stealthy so you might not know about it yet. Google Visby class.

[Kitschum]

How do you sink a Swedish battleship?

- Put it in the water.

Why do the NEW Swedish Navy vessels have glass bottoms?

- To see the old Swedish Navy.

Why does the NATO classify the full Swedish Navy as submarine class?

- All the Swedish vessels are on the bottom of the sea.



Looks like yet another swedish warship sunk by danes heva been found

Btw, we have exactly the same jokes about Norwegians. Danes never feature in Swedish jokes because no one has figured out yet what they're mumbling about so there was never any need to retaliate.

[Lonestar]

It's very stealthy so you might not know about it yet. Google Visby class.

That's actually a pretty ****ty corvette.

[rah]

When I was growing up, all of these jokes had the Italian Navy as the target.

[Kitschum]

That's actually a pretty ****ty corvette.

Yes, it is virtually unarmed and useless. But you gotta find it to sink it, and more importantly, it works with my joke.

[BlackCat]

When I was growing up, all of these jokes had the Italian Navy as the target.

No offense meant, but I guess that your knowledge of scandinavian history may be a bit wague. Denmark and Sweden are probably those countries that has fought the largest number of wars against each other. Danes were best at sea while Sweden had the upper hand on land, so it usually ended without a winner.

[Ben Kenobi]

Except when the Storebaelt froze over.

[Kitschum]

Except when the Storebaelt froze over.

Yes, we won in the end because we got to keep Scania. I say "we" knowing this is historically a bit iffy since most of my family is from that very province.

[Zoetstofzoetje]

There used to be this massive city somewhere in the NL, Dorestad, which p00f vanished after the Vikings visited. Of course, how has Scandinavia distinguished itself after the Vikings, one might ask?

[Kitschum]

By topping "best place to live" lists.

[BlackCat]

By topping "best place to live" lists.

QFT. Add H.C.Andersen, Maersk, Lego etc.

Edit: That wasn't nice of me - there are also Volvo (isn't that actually ford ?), Nokia (yeah, finnish), statoil (norwegian), Nobel (he's responsible of lots of peoples death, but it's a nice price), SAAB should be here but , though, there are a famous swedish botanist (can remember his name), and then there are bofors - great guns.

[Kitschum]

QFT. Add H.C.Andersen, Maersk, Lego etc.

Oh I like that list, but it's just a start. I have so much more to add if someone would goad me on... Anyone?

BTW: Whenever I post on Apolyton I realize just how much of an insane raging nationalist I really am.

[BlackCat]

I think we have a nice little x-post/dansing