obession or devotion

[boann]

Originally posted by Whaleboy
Devotion is love/enfatuation when you're thinking/feeling only for the other person

Obsession is love/enfatuation when you're thinking/feeling only for yourself... knowingly or unknowingly playing Jesus to make yourself feel better.

really... what a concept

[Whaleboy]

Some things never work out the way you intend I guess, and whether or not someone's aware of their true intentions is probably another minefield.

At the risk of sounding like I have my foot caught in a euphamistic pothole, love is blind!

[Pyrodrew]

Originally posted by boann
what sort of actions would you think are obsessive?
but what things have happened to you
that made you feel uncomfortable ?

ok back ontopic... jezzz
so no one has any answers to these pressing questions

I've never had anyone obsessed me. I've experienced things that made the person appear needy, but not obsessive.

Obsession is love/enfatuation when you're thinking/feeling only for yourself... knowingly or unknowingly playing Jesus to make yourself feel better.

I'm not sure it's that clear cut. People obsessed with someone often neglect their own physical and mental state to a dangerous degree, let every other area of their life suffer because of their feelings for that person.

I agree, except not necessarily for one person but a one-track mind focused on having their fatansy (with that person) become reality. Their savings, job, family, friends, health all insignificant in comparison. And if they ever do obtain that fatansy (with that person) they hold on and never let go.

[Whaleboy]

That's de Clerembault's syndrome... which is obsession but obsession needn't be dCs.

[boann]

de Clerembault's syndrome is the delusion that someone is in love with you -- usually someone of higher social status, often a stranger, and sometimes a celebrity.

i think this obsession would be different that what we are talking about.. since its not based on a real relationship ..

[Sikander]

Originally posted by boann

huh?

In other words you can be obsessive without your partner complaining about it or even noticing it because they are too needy / co-dependent etc. People who have tended to obsess their whole lives through don't have a good baseline for self-analysis, which is why it's sometimes good to talk to someone who you thinks has sound judgement / a professional in order to diagnose the situation.

[curtsibling]

Re: obsession or devotion

Originally posted by boann
when does love cross the line between devotion to obsession.................

When the guy actually begins to enjoy watching soap operas with the gal.

[DeathByTheSword]

i am to bored to read the whole thread so sue me if this is already said:


obsessive devotion!

[Ben Kenobi]

I leave notes around the house for my wife to find when I'm not there. She likes it. A letter everyday might be a bit much, unless it is short like "have a good day, love you, see you tonight"

Phone calls? If you are in a relationship with someone I don't see why a half hour every night can't be tolerated, just to see how each others days went

I don't hear well, so an email letter serves the same purpose as a half an hour phone call. Otherwise, I have to completely agree about the phone call each day to ask how the day has been.

[Ben Kenobi]

When the guy actually begins to enjoy watching soap operas with the gal

Uh oh.

[Ben Kenobi]

As for obsession, I got labelled as obsessed by my first girlfriend. I would chat to her over the phone about once a week, it being long distance, so I never understood her complaint.

Then I found out later she had been cheating on me, so it made perfect sense

[Japher]

IMO, when you found the right person you can dote on them to your hearts content and they will never consider it obsession...

[Whaleboy]

Originally posted by boann
de Clerembault's syndrome is the delusion that someone is in love with you -- usually someone of higher social status, often a stranger, and sometimes a celebrity.

i think this obsession would be different that what we are talking about.. since its not based on a real relationship ..

Ahh! I read too much Ian McEwan, and by too much I mean "any".