I'm split up with my wife agian.

[Kidlicious]

Cool Japher. I'll PM you.

Thanks everyone.

[Japher]

Yeah, let me know. Wifey is pregers and her family (in Kerman) and mine want to see her getting all fat. I haven't planned to get back, but I guess I should.

[Kidlicious]

Do you like Bar and Grills?

[Jon Miller]

good luck dude

JJM

[DRoseDARs]

Do whatever is legally necessary to get custody of your son.

[Rufus T. Firefly]

That sucks, kid.

Having seen my wife through her divorce with her awful ex, the only advice I can give you is: document every instance of atrocious behavior, then hire a shark. It'll cost you a fortune, but it'll be the best money you ever spend.

[Ben Kenobi]

Ditto.

Your son is worth the effort.

[Mr. Harley]

Kidicious - contact CPS, Child Protective Services, the first time your child is left unattended, or you can document she is taking drugs, etc. Document her unstable history from the previous separation, and check if anybody who kicked her out will come foward about the drug use. Make the point this is not for you, it's for the kid. Even jerks will sometimes help when phrased that way.

Please check with a lawyer first concerning these next items. Especially check about your access to you old apartment, i.e. are you legally barred yet. If not, try to get a hair sample (again, check this with a lawyer), for example from a brush. You may need to do this via a private investigator versus yourself, state law can get very strange. Move back in with her and support her for a couple of months if that is what it takes to get legal access to the hair sample - again, check with a lawyer.

Then you can have the hair analyzed for drugs. I have no idea what the ins and outs are in your state, so let me repeat this again - get a lawyer and check the legality of what I am suggesting in your state. However, as long it passes muster, this may be the best way for you to get custody if she really is drug using, unless you can get multiple witnesses as to her drug use, etc.

If you start divorce proceedings again, do so in your new county if possible. Your judge in your last proceeding turned down temporary custody for you, and it is only going to get worse. Judges handing a divorce in the US are some of the most awesomely powerful people in existance, and can deny due process, disovery, and even by judicial fiat ignore the germane laws. Thank God I've never been through one, but the number of harrowing stories I know of are frightening.

[Kidlicious]

Thanx shawnmcc.

I called CPS before. I even had people go to the house. They don't seem to want to do anything or can't.

The police have been called a few times. They know she's nuts. I tell them that she's a drug addict. I tell them my whole situation, but they don't do thing or give me any usefull advice.

One thing is wierd to me. Being her husband I can't just call the cops and say here's her drugs.

[Urban Ranger]

Hang in there comrade, and fight for your son.

[Mr. Harley]

Kidicious - that's a new one on me (you cannot tell the cop's heres her drugs. However, what to do is call CPS and say I am in my house and have found a stash of what are fear are drugs and that there is a five year old child in the house. Make absolutely certain you do not touch them, and ask CPS send someone immediately, or have the police come, and remove them. Then voluntarily undergo drug tests, including your hair (depends on the drugs). Offer to undergo a lie-detector test - bogus, but courts and police like the damn things for some reason - and then leave it up to her lawyer to explain what the problem is. Note - which I'll keep repeating - get a lawyer, a good lawyer.

Also if you know she is using, ask to talk to the narcotics squad in your city. Explain what the problem is, and ask exactly what you need to do. If they refuse, then (and again, get a lawyer) have counsel write a very nice letter to CPS and the police department (or whatever counsel recommends) stating that you have told them about the problem, followed procedure, and that you are now writing this letter to confirm your discussions in the case, quite likely with drug use, that something happens to your child to document negligence by the responding agencies.

Include the wife's ex-lovers who you've tracked down, and who indicate they are willing to help out your kid. Now you've done some of their homework for CPS or the police, hopefully making it a little easier for them/forcing their hand. Please note that these steps are ONLY to be taken in extremis, once you bring in the lawyer and write letters like this you will be on all and sundries sh*t list more than likely. You won't be able to jay walk without a ticket.

[Spiffor]

Re: I'm split up with my wife agian.

Originally posted by Kidicious
The worse part is that my son thinks everything is my fault because I yell. He doens't understand how hard it is not too.

That's harsh
Hang in there, Kid

[Saras]

Fight for your son. And WIN, for his sake.

And what Shawn said.

[Dinner]

Originally posted by Kidicious
Yes. I believe that the divorce is still on the books or whatever the word is. All you have to do is ask for another court date, but we lived in another county so I'm not sure.

That sucks. Which country? I ask because if it is Mexico then that country has strong Child protection laws and if you can show your wife is on drugs, is living with strange men, and/or commiting adultary you would likely get legal custody through their system.

[civman2000]

Originally posted by Oerdin


That sucks. Which country? I ask because if it is Mexico then that country has strong Child protection laws and if you can show your wife is on drugs, is living with strange men, and/or commiting adultary you would likely get legal custody through their system.

County, not country.