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When can I call myself a Southerner?

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  • #1

    When can I call myself a Southerner?

    Well, I've been down here ten months, but I was born in the South, and I did live here a few years back in the late 60s and 70s. Unfortunately, most of the people around here are from the North, so I'm not picking up much of a Southern accent.

    When do I get to be a Southerner!?!

    Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...
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  • #2
    "When do I get to be a Southerner!?!"

    When you repent of your evil ways. Then we might think of letting you be one of us.

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    • #3
      Ugh -- I'm ashamed of you Chegitz.

      Why would any sensible person like you aspire to become a Southerner??



      *** runs to put on flame-retardant suit before David, Slowwhand, Tiamat, and others kill me ***
      A lot of Republicans are not racist, but a lot of racists are Republican.

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      • #4
        Re: When can I call myself a Southerner?

        Originally posted by chegitz guevara
        When do I get to be a Southerner!?!

        When you start wearing a cowboy hat, or speak with a southern drawl.

        A bull-horn hood orniment might also suffice.
        Rethink Refuse Reduce Reuse

        Do It Ourselves

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        • #5
          "When do I get to be a Southerner!?!"

          When y'all is common vocabulary.
          I came upon a barroom full of bad Salon pictures in which men with hats on the backs of their heads were wolfing food from a counter. It was the institution of the "free lunch" I had struck. You paid for a drink and got as much as you wanted to eat. For something less than a rupee a day a man can feed himself sumptuously in San Francisco, even though he be a bankrupt. Remember this if ever you are stranded in these parts. ~ Rudyard Kipling, 1891

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          • #6
            Exactly.
            Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
            "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
            He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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            • #7
              I say "y'all" all the time. (Even twenty five years in the North couldn't kill that.). . . As for the cowboy hat, I ain't buyin' one 'till I can afford a genuine Stetson.
              Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

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              • #8
                And don't forget the boots. Oh man, you should see my favorite boots. Beautiful multi-colored stitching.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

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                • #9
                  I had a friend who had purple cowboy boots. Oh good they were among the ugliest things I've ever seen. Theben's girlfriend.
                  Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

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                  • #10
                    These I'm talking about are 10 stitch Tony Lama bull hide.
                    They'll last forever.
                    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                    "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                    He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Have you eaten grits yet? That's the true mark, you know .
                      “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                      - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

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                      • #12
                        yech! I hate grits. Of course, Texas is Texas. Not really "The South".
                        Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                        "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                        He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          It really depends on how nice you are when you pass someone by in something like a hallway.

                          If you'll only see them for a couple seconds, you nod your head.

                          If you have a bit more time you say something like "Hey."

                          If there is a lot of time you say "How's it going?" - "Fine, how about you?" - "Fine." Or something to that affect.
                          "Yay Apoc!!!!!!!" - bipolarbear
                          "At least there were some thoughts went into Apocalypse." - Urban Ranger
                          "Apocalype was a great game." - DrSpike
                          "In Apoc, I had one soldier who lasted through the entire game... was pretty cool. I like apoc for that reason, the soldiers are a bit more 'personal'." - General Ludd

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                          • #14
                            I've never liked grits, least not the way Mom made them (she's a Kentuckian), butter and salt. Whole hominey, though, I love.


                            I was thinkin' 'bout gator boots, Slow, livin' in Florida and all.
                            Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

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                            • #15
                              Southern wimmin drive me crazy. They are TOO NICE! In the North they'd be flirtin' with you. Here they're just bein' neighborly.
                              Christianity: The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...

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