it's the revival of the corrupt wish game (II)

[Mr. Harley]

You new AI code takes over the world. Decides you should be the ruler. When you don't cooperate, you are deleted.

I wish my little girl was so precocious that she figured out how to use a potty seat at nine months (right now).

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted, but she figured out how to put your important papers there first.

I wish I could control the color of my hair.

[Theben]

Granted, but you must 1st buy Just for Mentm for it to work.

I wish there was a holiday where an insane fascist gave bananas to good little girls and boys by throwing them out of a helicopter.

[Q Classic]

granted. good little girls and boys are thrown out of helicopters into banana republics below.

babykiller.


i wish that people would just go away and leave me alone, because i'm sick and tired of fixing up their idiot mistakes on the computer.

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted. People all go away from you...never again does someone talk to you again.

I wish my daughter wasn't sick.

[Spec]

Granted. She is fully healed with an amazing boost of energy for the rest of her life. Never again will you do something in peace.

I wish I was at homw right now.

Spec.

[Q Classic]

congratulations. you're now in homw, capital of north elbonia.

i wish all pointy-haired bosses would die.

[Spec]

Granted, you die.

I wish I was at HOME!

Spec.

[Theben]

Granted. You are at home. Little did you realize that your new home is a small, cramped cubicle. You now live at work.

[Theben]

btw, I meant that the BANANAS were to be thrown from the helicopter!

I wish that I was singing in the rain.

[Q Classic]

you are. but it's acid rain. your new nickname is twoface, but that's because the whole top of your head is burned away.

i wish that deliberate misunderstandings were always funny.

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted. But unintentional misunderstandings are now never funny. Spontaneity is lost and a certain enjoyment in life is gone forever.

I wish they could really reattach Ted Williams head to his body.

[Q Classic]

granted, but 1000 years from now, fry and leela will never be able to meet his head in a jar. it will also turn out that fry is related to you somehow, and the shame of that blacklists you from any future breeding.

i wish idiots would never get on idiot tv programs like wheel of fortune. i mean, come on... we had a stupid woman say that brotherly love, cream cheese, and the liberty bell were all in new york for chrissakes. anybody with half a brain would know that the correct answer is boston. jeebus.

[Shogun Gunner]

Granted. Now idiots get on Jeopardy and the really smart people go to Wheel of Fortune. Both shows are ruined (perhaps they already were).

I wish there was only one time zone.

[ICBM]

Granted. You now live in the land of the midnight sun.

I wish I had chickens had three wings, so there would be more chicken wings to eat.