Please don't take this too seriously.

[Aeson]

Only #4

Well we haven't really even started to cover the topic. We need some in-depth analysis about why Jesus was at a stripclub ... and conspiracy theories full disclosure about who it was that put the fungus in his edibles

[Lorizael]

Wrote 1,847 words this weekend. Not sure if the words are any good, but whatevs.

[Buster Crabbe's Uncle]

Good - writers write. Generating the first draft is job one. Most people mostly let their inner editor stop them before they get that far.

[Lorizael]

Woke up in the middle of the night feeling weird. Not sure how to describe it. Feeling kind of fuzzy, mostly. Then I shook uncontrollably for a little while, but I may have just been cold. Not sure. Pretty sure I was gonna die. Didn't, apparently.

[MOBIUS]

Glad you're still with us.

I must say that this drug sounds like a total shot in the dark with potential dangerous consequences - but I suppose you know that already...

Ever thought of filling up your time with free MOOCs?

Here's one that's about to start that might help you with your writing - or not - but here it is anyway: https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/...riting-fiction

[Lorizael]

I used to watch a lot of The Teaching Company's lectures. And some of MIT's open courseware stuff. I haven't done any MOOCs, although I did sign up for one of MIT's edX courses. But I'm not even going to my real classes, which I've paid for. So it seems kind of backwards to start taking fake classes during the time I should be attending/studying for my real classes.

[MOBIUS]

Maybe. Or it might kickstart you back into getting into the habit of doing those classes? Also, just do it in your 'spare time' instead?

Anyway, the only thing that got me through my degree was an extremely high class attendance, because I knew I wouldn't be doing any of the follow up work - I knew that if I fell off that particular wagon it would be extremely difficult to get back on.

Just find when your next lesson is and even if all you do is attend at the back or whatever, at least you got back into 'the habit' - then keep going...

[Lorizael]

My next lesson is in 1.5 hours. I have classes in the middle of the workday. Because I'm too ashamed to tell my boss/coworkers that I'm no longer going to class, I still leave and then come back at the appropriate times. While I'm "at class" I'm usually learning valuable lessons from the ceiling above my bed.

[MOBIUS]

Hmmm, I can see how that would pose a problem.

Is it too late to re-engage with your course?

If you go to your class it might help you break your current cycle - the alternative is learning valuable lessons from the ceiling above my bed - which doesn't sound particularly appealing in my book.

How about you just make the journey to your class without necessarily going in? Do you find the classes interesting? maybe do some background reading on the subject with the time you're supposed to be in class?

[MOBIUS]

You strike me as someone who could probably do their course effortlessly if they put their mind to it. That's my one get out of jail card - things have to be a pretty ****ing lost cause before I'm unable to rescue a situation at the very last minute...

Also happens to be my major downfall as I'm perversely rather proud of that fact - the **** truly hits the fan for me when I misjudge the minimum time possible to complete a particular task and fail - often in pretty spectacular ways...

[Lorizael]

Do I find the classes interesting? No, and that's my biggest problem (school-wise). It's probably just a symptom of the depression, because I don't find anything interesting right now. But for the last two years I've survived on the fact that all this physics and math I was learning was really interesting to me. I thought I'd figured out what I was actually passionate about. But now my interest has waned, as it always does, and everything feels just like it did the last two times I tried my hand at college.

The sad truth is that there are only two "things" I've been passionate about for more than a few years: writing and the evil bestfriend.

[MOBIUS]

Then why don't you concentrate on the writing?

[Lorizael]

Because I'd like to be comfortable financially.

[dannubis]

Then go to the ****ing class.

[MOBIUS]

Then therein lies the conundrum.

However, might you be better of being comfortable mentally than financially?