How Many Times Have You Been in Love?

[Lorizael]

Never been to a Poly meet?!

One. Taken together, they may have surpassed me.

[Jon Miller]

Because (here People are one or both of the people in the failed relationship):

1. People don't communicate.
2. People are too selfish.
3. People just really want that initial giddy feeling and not real love.

Some common ones, at least.

JM

[MikeH]

Then why oh why do so many relations fail ?

People don't pay attention, people are selfish, people don't care, situations change, people change, people get into bad relationships, just knowing someone is pissed off or unhappy doesn't solve anything...

[dannubis]

So because it is not so obvious when someone is unhappy if you are nose-deep into a relationship.

[MikeH]

Comes under "people don't pay attention" for me. Very common to take things for granted, and very hard not to do that.

Saying it's easy to tell if you pay attention doesn't mean that making sure you always continue to pay attention is easy.

[Provost Harrison]

Honestly, I suspect that some of the reason PH hasn't found anyone is similar to why Alby hasn't, girls (especially the more interesting girls) almost all believe in Love.

JM

I jest in my earlier post. My reasons are entirely different to Albie's. Entirely different, trust me. In terms of absolutely everything else I get on with men and women alike (in fact I get along with women far better than the average man it would seem). But I have no self confidence with women. Too many years have eroded any kind of confidence in that respect, and it also made me so self-critical that I have a very deep problem in that I could never see how any woman could see me attractive. Sounds silly, and it is, but it is a veritable death sentence. At this point in life the cost of this problem is more than I could've ever thought - no companionship, no family, nothing. I don't like to feed the piranhas at this place but I feel this needed to be said. I do put on a lot of bravado regarding my situation, but the truth is rarely so simple. Funny really, everything else is life has been going like a dream - far better than I could've ever predicted. I've managed to sort out the difficult stuff in life and f**k up the real simple basics that everyone else takes for granted.

But trust me, I do not regard women in the same way as Albie. Many of my best friends are women, unlike Albie who just wants a [ferengi]FEMALE[/ferengi] to bear his offspring.

[dannubis]

When you are generally feeling good about yourself and your professional accomplishments and are not f(erengi)ugly you should have no problem in attracting womens attention. So stop worrying about it and enjoy the ride.

[Provost Harrison]

If I had a penny for everyone who has told me "it will just happen" I'd be a very rich man. Isn't true though.

[dannubis]

I didn't say it will just happen. I said you need to enjoy the ride and then you can make it happen.

[Provost Harrison]

Hmmm...well I definitely enjoy the ride but, well, this kind of stuff is just beyond me. I'm not like Albert where it drives me into some horrendous misogyny...but I can understand how some end up at that point.

[MikeH]

Sometimes it just happens but it's much more likely to happen if you work on it.

If you can somehow muster the confidence to put yourself out there you'd get there eventually PH. You're a great guy, nice, generous, decent looking, intelligent and funny and you are interested in a proper relationship, not a bastard. Trick is believing us when we tell you that I guess.

[dannubis]

You see PH ? Mike here already wants to share a room with you...

[Provost Harrison]

I know, the believing it is hard bit, especially believing it to the core. But it just seems that women never quite see me in that way anyway. It never seems to matter how well I do over the things I have control over, I'm never quite right. Hmmm...

[Provost Harrison]

Perhaps I should make a "Recommend Provost a New Girlfriend" thread

[MikeH]

I know, the believing it is hard bit, especially believing it to the core. But it just seems that women never quite see me in that way anyway. It never seems to matter how well I do over the things I have control over, I'm never quite right. Hmmm...

Keep getting back on the horse.

And don't call her a horse to her face...