Church + Girlfriend problem.

[Ben Kenobi]

The other thing I don't agree with is this 10% tithing. When did God come up with the idea of "10%"? why 10%? and how does one work out what 10% is of what you own?

Deuteronomy 18:21-5

"I give to the Levites all the tithes in Israel as their inheritance in return for the work they do while serving at the Tent of Meeting. From now on the Israelites must not go near the Tent of Meeting, or they will bear the consequences of their sin and will die. It is the Levites who are to do the work at the Tent of Meeting and bear the responsibility for offenses against it. This is a lasting ordinance for the generations to come. They will receive no inheritance among the Israelites. Instead, I give to the Levites as their inheritance the tithes that the Israelites present as an offering to the LORD. That is why I said concerning them: 'They will have no inheritance among the Israelites.' "

The LORD said to Moses, "Speak to the Levites and say to them: 'When you receive from the Israelites the tithe I give you as your inheritance, you must present a tenth of that tithe as the LORD's offering.

Even the priests tithe a tenth of what they receive, and this is where the tenth comes from.

Besides, it's quite contradicting, why does God say 10% but Jesus says 100%?

Good question. Let's see what Jesus says.

Matthew 19:20-2

"All these I have kept," the young man said. "What do I still lack?"

Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

The commandment that Christ left out in this passage is, 'do not covet'. One is not required to give all his possessions to follow Christ, nor even to tithe the ten percent. But one is encouraged to give all that he has to God. The tithe has become the traditional amount, for an offering to God, but it is certainly not limited to 10%, if one chooses to give more, one can certainly do so.

[Wezil]

Offering to 'God'?

He can have the cheque when he comes to pick it up.

[Ben Kenobi]

First, suggest going to a different church.

Say that you want to see what other ones are available (you can say you don't particularly like the Pastor's Sermons or something)

this is very common, and most faith communities can handle it

Certainly another option. If the only difficulty that snoopy has is with the prophecy and speaking in tongues, then he might be happier in another church. However, if he has a problem with church in general, then that would need to be resolved. Switching churches wouldn't help him much here.

[DinoDoc]

Anyway, what should I do? Stop going to church, face endless screaming and fighting (I never argue, shout, scream or get violent, but she does) possibly ending a 7 year relationship or continue to go to church even though I know it's all ridiculous?

Forgive me if this has already been suggested, but what is the problem with finding another church?

[Sava]

Originally posted by DRoseDARs

Your girlfriend is a vapid bimbo if she honestly and truly believes that you can't believe in God if you don't go to church. Dump her before she steals your soul and sells it on eBay.

[Dr Strangelove]

Yes, I was going to suggest asking her if the two of you could try another church too. You could try sampling some yourself and try to pick one you think she'll like, or invite her to come along as you search for a mutually satisfying compromise.

The Quakers are also into prophesy, but don't restrict it to the pastors. Anyone in the congregation may speak up.

[Sava]

Re: Church + Girlfriend problem.

Originally posted by Sn00py

Anyway, what should I do? Stop going to church, face endless screaming and fighting (I never argue, shout, scream or get violent, but she does) possibly ending a 7 year relationship or continue to go to church even though I know it's all ridiculous?

btw, talking to her about it won't work, I have tried that 2-3 times before, she ends up crying and depressed and I end up giving in and going to church just for her. But I just can't keep doing this for the rest of my life. It does not feel right.

sounds like an awful situation

GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN

(I never argue, shout, scream or get violent, but she does)

psychos

no p*ssy is worth that

[chequita guevara]

Originally posted by DRoseDARs
Or could it be that some people are too stupid to know the difference? Remember: "If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it ought to be good enough for the children of Texas.” --Texas Governor Ma Ferguson, est. 1924. Quoted in All Pianos Have Keys, 1994

Both the quote and the source are incorrect.

[chequita guevara]

[SIZE=1] then we talked about children. We decided that our children would go to church, be confirmed or whatever, until we thought that they had learned enough to make their own choice.

So .... yer gonna brainwash 'em until they can think for themselves??

[Sava]

[FrostyBoy]

FYI, the pastors have BMW's and Mercede's.

The main pastor, apparently receives "only $4000" a month. This is more than double what I earn, and here in Singapore, my wages are considered quite good.

All of them wear very expensive clothing.

Everytime I hear or see this, I get annoyed. Once, for about 2 months, I was frustrated to the point that I almost went out to challenge all christian leaders of the world to go to church wearing the same clothes as Jesus did. Just for 1 Sunday. (of course, I didn't know exactly how I would go about doing this ) I would be really interested to see how many manage to accomplish it.

[The Emperor Fabulous]

Re: Church + Girlfriend problem.

Originally posted by Sn00py
I have yet another problem with the church I attend.

I attend because my girlfriend goes.

As for my belief, well, I am indifferent, I do not wish to rule out God or rule out No-God. I seek answers in God (prayer) the same I would seek for answers in DNA (if I had the means).


When I attend church, I am probably the most abservant and the one watching out for hidden messages. I'm always trying to understand the pastors and the way they function the church's daily activities.

Recently, every Friday night session, someone from the crowd (a pastor) will have God "talk" through him/her. And at the end of their "amazing/inspirational" speech, they ALWAYS say "thus sayeth the lord". When I first heard it, I was like "what the? thus sayeth the lord?, God would not say "sayeth!"".

The second time I heard it, I tried not to laugh, and the 3rd and the 4th, with each passing time it happened, I became annoyed, why do they keep doing this, pretending that God is talking through one of the pastors? But from day 1, I have always known the answer, they simply want to encourage the members to do God's will; but this is just insulting.

This is just one of the many things they do that do not make sense, or are just plain insulting. (If there is a God, otherwise its just plain foolishness).

Anyway, on to my real problem, I am on the verge of discontinuing my attendance to church, I do not want to be apart of this charade anymore, I've had enough of it.

Unfortunately, my girlfriend (fiance), will take this incredibly seriously, she will take it as far as dumping me completely, she would never forgive me for it (ironic isn't it).

However, my point of view is that church is NOT NECCESSARY to believe in God, but my gf does not see it that way, she believes that you can only believe in God if you go to church.

It is starting to become clear to me, that she does not go to church for God, but she goes to church for church. And I would not be surprised if most women do. Not to sound sexist, but as far as I can tell, this is how it looks.


Anyway, what should I do? Stop going to church, face endless screaming and fighting (I never argue, shout, scream or get violent, but she does) possibly ending a 7 year relationship or continue to go to church even though I know it's all ridiculous?

btw, talking to her about it won't work, I have tried that 2-3 times before, she ends up crying and depressed and I end up giving in and going to church just for her. But I just can't keep doing this for the rest of my life. It does not feel right.

Go read or see "Major Babara" by George Bernard Shaw. One of the main characters (Anthony Cusins) is an active member of the Salvation Army only because Barbara, his fiance, loves it so much. He's actually a "collecter of religions". In the end he ends up inheriting a multi-million dollar Weapons factory.

I'm not sure how it will help you. All I know is that your problem was his.

[chequita guevara]

I should point out that this church is blaspheming by saying the lord speaks through them.

Aside from that, this is not an issue that is resolvable. The fact that she is willing to end your relationship over this is all you need to know about the situation.

She is in a cult. She is not going to have a relationship with anyone outside the cult. If you insist on trying to be free from it, she will end your relationship, because being in the cult is the most important thing in her life. It will take something bigger than you to break her from it, and maybe not even that could do it. Lots of people willingly took their lives at Jonestown (and the rest were forced). (Just cuz it's a Christian don't mean it ain't a cult, there are thousands of Christian cults in the U.S. alone.)

Get out and get on with your life. The sooner you do it, the more of the rest of your life you have left to get on with.

[FrostyBoy]

Oh just in case anyone is interested, they have a website: http://www.evangel.org.sg/

[chequita guevara]

Just cuz you are in love, it does not mean you will be happy together.