Word up I agree with Capitalist this activity has got to be put to a stop quickly and I would get involved and explain to her all the nasty things that can happen and not just tell her to get off of the chat without an explanation.
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Originally posted by Joseph
Good for you. I did not let my 3 daughter date until 16.The genesis of the "evil Finn" concept- Evil, evil Finland
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There appears to be a hint of lynchmob mentality surfacing in this thread....
"He talked to a 12 year-old girl! Kill him! Call the police!"The genesis of the "evil Finn" concept- Evil, evil Finland
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It's a Counterglow in-joke. The equivalent of the DL dance.The genesis of the "evil Finn" concept- Evil, evil Finland
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My sisters would've killed anyone suggesting they were dating at 14 ...Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?
It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok
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When you rock 'n' roll with me...
On December 12, 1957, Jerry married his second cousin, Myra Gale Brown. A lot of ink has been spilled about his close blood relationship with Myra, and the fact that she was only thirteen and still believed in Santa Claus when the pair were married. For a man from his time and place, however, marrying at thirteen and marrying one's second cousin (twice removed) were both fairly commonplace occurrences, although Lewis further complicated matters by again marrying before the divorce from his second wife was final.
Did he say 13 ?Vive la liberte. Noor Inayat Khan, Dachau.
...patriotism is not enough. I must have no hatred or bitterness towards anyone. Edith Cavell, 1915
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Originally posted by Mercator
I'd start trying to talk to her. And do your best to treat her like your equal/an "adult".
Kids her age tend to feel they know exactly what they're doing and they're always right (well, maybe they are). If you're giving her the idea that you don't trust her, that she's just a kid and doesn't know what she's doing, tell your parents (if they don't know yet), let alone restrict her Internet access, you might alienate her.
Especially if her parents would just kinda tell her off and stop her from talking to him. It might work counter-productively adn lead her to start talking to him, say, at one of her friends' places. Or the worst thing that could happen is that she runs off to this guy.
Do you know if she's talking to many guys, or if it's just the one? If it's just one I wouldn't exactly call her a cam whore, though it may not be any less worrying.
Try to find out how she feels about/for him, what kind of relationship she has with him. Maybe you can ask if you can be with her when she talks to him, to meet the guy, so to speak.
I don't know...Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012
When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah
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Originally posted by Frankychan
This is the typical internet stalker/child molester at work. Screw her feelings. Get the parents involved IMMEDIATELY.
Although DRose is being nice. I'd go for total shock value. I'd punch the keyboard so hard while she was right there that the damned thing would snap in half. Then I'd chew her a** out. And if it's her computer, yes, I would put my fist through the monitor as well.
And worry about the stitches later.
No, I'm not bullsh***ing either, I would do this. If it were MY kids, I'd have my slippers ready for a paddling as well.Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012
When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah
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@Ozzy and Laz: Glad to hear I'm not the only sensible person around here.
Originally posted by Frankychan
This is the typical internet stalker/child molester at work. Screw her feelings. Get the parents involved IMMEDIATELY. (...)
The way I see it, there are two possible scenarios:
(1) She considers the guy nothing more than a friend and knows full well that she should be careful on the Internet about giving out any personal details.
Congratulations, your knee-jerk reaction means she hates you for being a total jackass when there was nothing to worry about. Not only that, but because she actually was being careful already she rightly feels that you think she's a worthless, immature little ***** who can't think for herself. Not to mention that you've just molested her more than that "child molester" ever would. Guess whose side's she's on now?
(2) She thinks this is her one true love, and the guy may very well be planning to do illegal things.
Considering that nothing actually happened yet, she'll hate you for ruining the relationship she thought she was having. Since the guy didn't actually do anything but talk to her, the police can't do ****, unless he actually turns out to be a pedophile.
That will also be the only case that you might be able to convince her that you were right. But then if he's the bad guy, why are you punishing her? This just doesn't add up. You're protecting her by beating her up or something? "It's for your own good" isn't it?
Even more, since she might very well continue to speak to him by other means, your bad actions might cause her to see you as the bad one who doesn't respect her, while her "boyfriend" does appreciate her. I'm sure a pedophile will know what to do with those kinds of feelings. If he isn't actually a pedophile he won't take advantage of that, in which case he shows you needn't have done it in the first place.
I'd say a better approach would be to tell her you're concerned but supportive. If you show you love her no matter what you won't leave the child molester much to go by. Just try and make sure that whatever she's doing, she's doing it where you can see it.
The worst that can happen, obviously, is that he is a manipulative child molester who will do anything to get to her. The kind of guys who say "Don't tell your parents". If she's reluctant to say anything about what she's doing and doesn't want you to see him, or if she says he doesn't want to see you, there's clearly a problem and you'd have to have a serious talk with her and make sure that you do talk to him.
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