Advanced Hellenistic Era NES - Part 2

[bipolarbear]

Idle Hands are the imagination's tool

So I had free time for my mind to wander aimlessly (bored in math class) and decided to lay out who exactly to some degree is employed by the Persian government.

Persian emperor: Morgan "Badass" Freeman

Persian General: General Mills

Rnadom Persian Satrap: Al Roker

Persian advisor: Tom Brokaw

More will come soon.

[appleciders]

What about General Electric?

[bipolarbear]

He died. Hit by a bolt of lightning.

(I'll have all of you know, that I ma personally avoiding the Col. Sanders joke b/c it is entirely obvious and thus not as menacing as General mills)

[bipolarbear]

Update soon?

Persia Semi Daily Tidings

The Persian Emperor has commanded all good freedom loving citizens of Persia to do the holy dance of the update (Also known as the funky Alphonso)!

The Persian Emperor Morgan Freeman, and his trusted advisor, Tom Brokaw, and the random Satrap, Al Roker, and the charming Persian Suspender Master General, Larry King, were all seen doing this dance and shinging (shout/singing) this instructsong (instructive song)

Morgan "Badass" Freeman:
It's just a jump to the left.

All:
And then a step to the right.

Tom:
With your hands on your hips.

All:
You bring your knees in tight.
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane.
Let's do the update again.
Let's do the update again.
Persia Pwns All!
Your country is teh $ux0rz!
(repeat ad nauseam or until update)

Persia has been feeling the heat wave of this dance craze, its the hottest number since the governmnet forced dance craze "Dismember a Heathen!"

Boy those were the days!

Currently
Persian Leader Morgan Freeman, and his "Persia Posse" (Tom Brokaw, Larry King and Al Roker)

Are temporarily traveling all about Persia doing shows to benefit the military in which they sing and breakdance to their hit song at the same time. In the middle Morgan Breaks it down with some ill rhymes:


Morgan Freeman and the Persia Posse- Ninja Rap Lyrics

Microsoft Word up!
YO! it's the black machine--
gonna rock the town without bein' seen
have you ever seen a Persian Get Down?--
Slammin' Jammin' to the new swing sound
Yeah, everybody let's move--
Freeman is here with the new Jack Groove
Gonna rock, and roll this place--
With the power of the Persian ninja turtle bass
Freeman, ya know I'm not playin'--
Devastate the show while the Persians are sayin:

chorus:
Freeman Freeman, RAP! Freeman Freeman, RAP! Freeman Freeman, RAP!
GO GO GO GO
Go Morgan, Go Morgan, GO; Go Morgan, Go Morgan, GO!
Go Morgan Go Morgan, GO; Go Morgan, Go Morgan, GO!
GO GO GO GO

Lyrics, fill in the gap--Drop that bass and get the Persian Coast RAP
Feel it, if you know what i mean--
Give it up, for the heroes in the East
Just flowin, smooth with the power, kickin it up, hour after
hour
Cause in this life there's only one winner--
You better aim straight so you can hit the center
In it to win, with a team of four--
Persian Posse that you gotta adore it's the:

chorus:

Villians you better run and hide--
Because one day you might not slide
So Choose your weapon but don't slip--
MC Morgan's in control with the flex of the mic grip
Rockin' the crowd the way it should be rocked--
With the Tyana drop that you like alot
You know, its Hittin' like a Persian Immortal when the bass kicks
in--
You better check your level
The power of Persia is strong--
Fightin' all the Crackers until they're all cold gone.

chorus: (x2)

[laurentius]

we love you good old trippy bipo

/me does the update dance


/me orders the whole roman republic to do it

[1889]

Is the Persian Posse available for weddings or bar mitsvahs?

[bipolarbear]

No bar Mitzvahs until the situation in Judea is setteld. But weddings by all means!!!!

Do you wish to trade for them?

[Tassadar500]

The update has taken 27 hours now.

[Micha]

UPDATE - 275 to 270 b.c.

Greece and Asia Minor
Macedonia
Athens, the thriving Metropolis, largest city in the world by now, urgently needed the territorial expansion which has now been provided by the new second city wall. Although quite useless in battle it is a first step and finally allows Athens to breath again. Within the first wall, additional granaries and wells have not only improved the health situation but, more importantly, prolongened the timespan the city could survive in the event of a siege.
While these facilities were built, envoys of Rome met the Macedonian king at the academy „to sign a permanent peace agreement between both nations, recognising the souvereignity of both
and affirming the commitment of Rome and Macedonia towards peaceful coexistence.“

In the far north, the Moesian army has been disbanded. The warriors founded a settlement called Tarsaticon; Although now a Macedonian town, it lacks all of the benefits of the Greek civilization.
Fort Dalmatia hasn´t been equipped with commodities either, so some of the miners there are already migrating to more prosperous parts of the vast country.
In Moesia there´s now plenty of farmland and much room for colonies; The Greek, however, would be much more encouraged to settle there if the „towns“ would feature something better than tents and wooden palisades... The largest Moesian settlement is Serdicon (today: Sofia), there some Macedonians have already married Moesian women.
North of the current borders several new tribal armies have formed! The Western Moesians, Dacians and Bastarnae. Until now no hostilities broke out, but it is advised to guard the border wih something more than cartographers...

Reinforcements for Alexander´s army were sent to Egypt, where they were to engage the Carthaginian war hero Hamilcar Barca. See part „Egypt“.

Lydia
King Maeon´s army reforms went into a new stage. A new stadion in Sardes will now feature exciting fights between the best warriors of the kingdom. The first „King´s champion“ has already been credited with his name on a marble tablet at the gates of the stadion.
New training facilities at the army camps will ensure to maintain the high level of fitness for the soldiers.
When the Lydian fleet set sail to combat the pirates at their bases, it was soon discovered that those were in fact Cretean towns on the various Aegean islands. Since there´s a peace agreement between Crete and Lydia, the naval commander decided not to engage in land combat. Besides, he didn´t have any troops with him anyway.
Far up in the mountains of the Mysian province, king Maeon ordered a mining camp to be set up. The rich silver deposals in the area will provide a good source of cash for several centuries, as it seems. A new road connecting the mine with the capital ensures a fast delivery of the silver to the smiths. Since most of the allocated ressources had to be used for the road, the mine is somewhat lacking equipment. It is also recommended to use the military for security purposes, especially during the transport of the mined metal...

Italian peninsula
Rome went into week long celebrations after the defeat of Pyrrhus, featuring triumphs by both the legions and the Spartan mercanary corps. Though the latter had to leave soon, since business was already awaiting them.
Shortly thereafter, the latest call to arms drew almost 10,000 young Romans into the legions. Only this time they felt proud to join the ranks of heroes that have saved Italy from Greek domination. One will find that the overall morale in the army is rising since the enemy was beaten, and with many young officers getting promoted to command their own legion the performance of the Roman war machinery keeps on improving.
The captured triremes of Pyrrhus have been refitted in Neapolis, revealing a superior construction compared to the Roman ships. The oars are now more robust and can be lifted more quickly in case of an enemy ship running past. The changes have been applied to all Roman ships. During this refitting process some shipbuilders proposed the addition of a boarding plank with a huge spike on one end, so the legionaries could easily board other ships during battle and so bring the Roman´s strength - land battle - to the enemie´s naval forces! It is estimated that such planks in addition to legionary quarters will cost roughly 20 talents to be added to each ship.
The conquest of southern Italy was - though quick and unspectacular - not without costs. Especially Croton put up quite a fight, the citizens taking whatever they found as arms, using traps and ambushs as well as burning parts of the city when the Romans entered. The fighting was fierce, but the legions crushed what little resistance they encountered, but took quite some casualties during the unexpected night raids. Fivehundred foot soldiers died when they got trapped in a quarter of the city that caught fire.
After the fall of Croton, Rhegion surrendered to Rome. With this last step the entire peninsula - from the Straits of Messina to the river Padus - became Roman territory. Now it was up to the Senate to decide about the status of the new territories. Many senators are in favor of deportating the population of Croton and replacing them with Roman colonists. As a stronghold of Pyrrhus the „Romanization“ of the city of Tarentum should also be considered.
To the north, a vastly reinforced Legion II continued the siege of Mediolanum. After several weeks the Celts finally gave up, opening the gates in exchange for food. Despite the usual practise in dealing with barbarians, the Roman army restricted herself to simply fortify in the city. No plundering, no burning and no civil punishment occured. While this will surely helps keeping peace in the region, many (young) Senators are demanding immediate Romanization of Mediolanum, meaning the deportation of the Celts to several southern city and the redistribution of the farmland to Roman families.

In Sicily, the construction of a large stronghold near Syracuse is being reported.
Pirates have plundered Panormos.

Western Mediterranean
While Carthage organized the defences in the Cyrenaica, Macedonian ships were already transporting the invasion force to Alexandrograd. The Carthaginian fleet, equipped with strengthened iron coating and an reinforced ramming thorns, engaged the Pharos Fleet which was patrolling along the coast.
Although the first clash of the two navies proofed to be a success for the heavier armoured Carthaginian ships, they had severe problems maneuvering. The lighter Macedon triremes were much faster and managed to cut off the oars of many Punic warships. Of course the Greek played for time, ensuring a safe departure for the main army.
When the Carthaginians realized that, they gave up the fight and instead tried to get through to the transporting ships. Unfortunately they were much too heavy so the Macedonians could easily surpass them. Eventually the Punic captain gave order to just break through at whatever cost.
While one transport could be sunk, all attacking triremes were finally rendered unmanoeuvrable.
All 42 hetaires on board drowned.
Due to the good armour, only four Carthaginian ships sank. The rest has been captured and can be refitted for 11 talents. Twenty-nine Greek ships were sunk in the battle.
When Alexander´s army pulled back, the defenders sighed with relief. Both citizen armies as well as heavy reinforcements from the core cities have met at Cyrene and prepared defences there. However, they waited in vain. There was no battle to come.
A little later the Spartan Mercenary Corps arrived, but the payment couldn´t be provided, so they left for Sparta again. Next time the pay will better be at hand...

Middle East
Egypt
An increased secret police spending allows for much better operations behind the line an enemy considers the „front“. This is exactly what the Egyptians are doing in this critical state of the kingdom.
Known as the best doctors since centuries, the Egyptians also have a wide knowledge of herbs and natural poisons. With the capital lost and an enemy army marching towards the only harbour, there was little discussion about whether the new strategy was too risky. All over Lower Egypt, wells have been poisoned and granaries burned. Lifestock was killed or taken away in order to not allow the Carthaginians to supply themselves from the fields and farms.
At the same time the arousing speeches of the Pharao let many young Egyptians flock to the flag, while there´s also an increasing number of partisans in the Northern plains...
Egyptian spies in Memphis soon learned about the Carthaginian attempt to get the Nubians into a war with Egypt; The threehundred horsemen sent south have been intercepted and annihilated by an Egyptian ambush.
While the Carthaginians in Memphis were resting to gather enough supplies for the further march north, the partisan attacks on sentries, outposts and patrols increased. Many soldiers got ill after fetching their weapons from the smith. Most of them died a few days later. After an entire patrol team died of poisoned water, the Carthaginians forced townsmen to taste any food before it was distributed.
These measures drastically lowered morale within Hamilcar´s army. Hungry soldiers robbed food from Egyptian homes, but even there some of it was poisoned. A kind of Paranoia formed, eventually making Carthaginians kill comrades in believe of having found a spy or traitor...
When the first casualties were reported, the oats for the horses was already mixed with henbane. More than 800 horses died within the following days.
Even two elephants had been poisoned, though it looks as if the concentration of the henbane was much too low to actually kill an elephant.
A riot of the Memphis citizens was brutally put down, killing thousands. Hamilcar had his war elephants trample the civilians in the narrow streets, causing a bloodbath with little casualties for his troops.
In response to these events, the Carthaginians left the city and headed north. Behind them, Memphis was burning for almost six days, leaving nothing but the bare temples. About 40,000 Egyptian civilians died. Thirty talents worth of loot disappeared mysteriously from Hamilcar´s treasury...

When Hamilcar was crossing the Nile river in order to get to Tanys, he found several small boats he could use. Ferrying over, his troops were greeted by a rain of arrows! It appears as if many of those were poisoned, too, since men that got hit never got up again.
When finally enough troops had reached the shores, Egyptian chariots attacked the landed. This went on for several hours, until a beachhead was established. Carthaginian scouts were sent out, but didn´t report back.
During the nights there were occasional raids by Egyptian cavalry, coming out of the dark without being detected. Tents were ignited, killing many soldiers asleep. One of these raids even managed to break into the elephant enclosure, setting free nine of the beasts. Those, hit by arrows and burning torches, ran amok in the camp and devastated parts of the supply stocks.
The hastily mounted cavalry went after the raiders, but many didn´t return and none managed to find the Egyptian base.
The following nights, when the Carthaginians didn´t dare to sleep, nothing happened. After some weeks the core of Hamilcar´s troops was hungry, scared and overtired. There was an increasing number of soldiers who suffered from diseases, many wounds became inflamed. More and more animals died from poisoning or simply starved.
When reaching Tanys, Hamilcar first plundered the granaries at the harbour, since those - containing export grains - weren´t poisoned. Strangely there were no merchant ships in the city; Even more strangely, there wasn´t any sign of the immortals either. Instead his scouts reported Macedonian warships patrolling the coast.
Hamilcar realized what that meant: Alexander´s army!
Taking positions just outside the city walls, he hoped to take advantage from the Greeks´ need to cross the Nile.
Supported by the fleet, the Macedonians performed several landings at once, stretching Hamilcar´s defences. Of course the whole operation was costly at the side of the Macedons, as many first-wave troops were slaughtered by the war elephants and bowmen.
The Persian immortals struck when the second wave of Macedonians landed. Breaching the defender´s lines in the rear, the elite warriors did quite some damage to the Carthaginian core, so that Hamilcar was forced to redeploy his elephants to the rear. Though that stalled - and pushed back - the Persian troops, it opened up the Macedon front. It was there where the first hoplites were brought into battle. The weakened foot soldiers, stood no chance to hold against the superior heavy infantry of the Greeks.
By that time the Egyptian main force arrived, distracting the Carthaginian defences further from the landing zone. Hamilcar had to split his elephant force, and the animals caused as much damage to the enemy as they did to their own forces. On the Nile banks, the first reek catapulta had been deployed. They proved to be a quite useful weapon when used against large formations or elephants, though it was hard to hit those.
Eventually the Carthaginians were so badly outnumbered that Hamilcar gave the order to launch an all out attack towards Judaea, hoping to reach the Jewish controlled territory with at least parts of his army. He didn´t know of the events in Persia yet, though...
Some thirty kilometres outside Tanys, the Carthaginians were finally encircled by the vast numbers of allied cavalry. Refusing to surrender, the Macedonians stormed the pocket as soon as the infantry arrived.
The following bloodbath was neither heroic nor single-sided. While Hamilcar´s infantry bas badly mauled, the elephants did extreme damage to the hordes of Greek infantry as well. Egyptian chariots charged into the Punic defenders to open lanes, and several poisoned projectiles struck down the giant beasts of Hamilcar. The battle went on for many hours. Hamilcar, the hero of Carthage, was shot from his horse and died in a chariot charge.
Finally the Carthaginians surrendered, though several dozens of elephants were still on a rampage. Most of those fled into the desert when the circle was opened...

The treasury remained at Tanys and was added to the Egyptian vaults. It will hardly be enough to rebuild what had been destroyed, but maybe the new structures will be even better than the old ones.
The prisoners got their thumbs cut off and were sold into slavery, providing another 30 talents.

Egypt lies in ruins. The farms are burned, granaries destroyed, wells poisoned, the capital obliterated and much of the infrastructure badly damaged.
All grain exports have been cancelled to feed the own population. Fortunately the papyrus farms are still operating, since they were concentrated near Naucratis at the Western Lower Nile.

Both Egypt and Macedonia have gained valuable experience in fighting elephants, resulting in more disciplined soldiers when facing those animals.

[Micha]

Persia
The Persian great king returned to the stage with a speech at Persepolis regarding the state of the empire and the actions he´s about to take. In this speech he mentioned the inferiority of Carthaginians when compared to the Persian people, earning him much applause; However, he has stated his wish for a peaceful end of the Judaea crisis, which upset many of the ruling class. Of course this was soon relativized when he added „It is a mistake, a very big mistake for which they may pay dearly!“.
The military was undergoing some reforming in the training of officiers, whic his supposed to help closing the gasp between the performance of Persian troops compared to the neighbouring countries. There were talks about Egyptian training supervisors, but so far they have yet to arrive.
On the social side, a very small gift was given to the poor in the Persian mainland, and even there only in the bigger cities. As a rather symbolical act it has of course no effect beyond being a „sign of goodwill“.
To the East, a large group of diplomats, merchants and adventurers has been sent to explore new trade routes with the Asian empires. A few new suppliers for silk and tea could be found, lowering the import costs of both. Also contacts have been made to various Eastern rulers providing a solid base for further negotiations.
The western merchants currently experience a booming export branche as the great king confirmed dozens of trade agreements with Egypt, Macedonia, Lydia and Rome. However, some of those merchants complain about the ridiculously low prices that have been agreed upon. With the exception of the tea and spices exports all products have been sold beneath the local prizes; Especially cattle was given away literally for free...
Meanwhile, the fight against corruption progresses slowly; It is believed that a state of this size with the given plurality of cultures will never become corruption-free...
One of the biggest projects of the upcomming years will be the reformation of the educational systems in Persia. The plan is to advocate education throughout the lower classes and to provide better opportunities for those capable of higher sciences. It is estimated that such an effort will cost a lot more money than currently stated and will raise the demand for paper to at least 20 talents/turn.
Until now the core cities have been provided with several state-owned lycaeums teaching maths and engineering sciences to the wealthier family´s sons. In order to educate the masses there will be the need for a literacy program. Currently only one out of thirty Persians is able to read and write...
A first effect of the new programs is a slightly increasing farm output, as the fields are now organized more efficiently; Mines will, once the program has fully started, surely be run more efficiently too.
In Judaea, the secret police is harshly enforcing Persian law and is rapidly gaining ground. Every evening dozens of Jewish rebels disappear from their homes, few of them ever to be seen again. Of course the order to catch them „without much fuss or show and without many people knowing“ is impossible to be enforced when one looks at the 4,000 dissidents nailed to crosses just outside Gaza...
The spread of the revolution has been contained somewhat, though the reasons for that remain hidden. Somehow the population in the northern towns isn´t that susceptible to the idea of rebellionanymore.
In Gaza the nightly raids have ceased after the Persians set up ambushs and traps as well as wardog patrols. With the intense interrogations by the secret police and the demontration of force in the streets, the centre of Jewish resistance has focussed on Jerusalem.
It is there that the Persian „Army of Egypt“ launched the final attack to put down the revolt. Still the city was held by more than 20,000 armed men, most of them hiding behind barricades and inside the buildings. The temporary headquarters for the Jews had been set up in the great Temple of Salomo.
Trying to get into the city, the Persians took severe casualties due to the lack of siege equipment.
Once the walls were taken by the use of ladders, the cavalry and chariots could rush into the city through the now opened gates. There a street fight developed, bloody and ineffective at the same time; Since the Persians chose to attack at night, they were carrying torches with them hindering their freedom of movement and being a nuisance in fights. On the other hand, the Jewish fighters found it extremely difficult to approach the Persian troops and patrol unseen...
At early morning, Persian charges went as far as the temple of Salomo. There they met fierce resistance and took quite heavy casualties; Of course the lightly armed Jews were literally slaughtered by the heavily armoured immortals, while the chariots could not be used in the narrow streets.
During the fightings, many torches have been dropped or knocked away, setting large parts of the city on fire. This was not intended by the leadership, but hard to avoid. At some point even the temple caught fire, destroying it completely for the second time.
Fleeing the fire, many Jews put down their arms and surrendered. Against their fears, the Persians accepted and most of the Jerusalem warriors went into Persian captivity.
With this day the short story of the Judaean Kingdom ended...
However the population in the area is now furious about the destruction of the Temple of Salomo, so the military commanders decided to not carry out further orders regarding „redeployments“.

NPC orders / Events
- "Jerusalem immortals" lost 225 immortals
- "Army of Egypt" lost 9,450 foot soldiers; 264 light infantry; 423 immortals; 856 horsemen; 421 swordsmen
- „Jewish Army“ surrendered
- "Legion IV Augusta" (Quintus Servilius Fidenas) lost 305 legionaries; 98 horsemen; 436 foot soldiers
- „Legion V Liguria“ (Vappa Monterus) lost 265 legionaries; 554 foot soldiers;
- Rome has now access to an oil and a wine ressource; Sicily lost both.
- Lydia now has access to a silver ressource
- new army: „Western Moesian tribes“ - West of Moesia - 4,500 horsemen; 6,000 foot soldiers
- new army: „Dacian Army“ - Dacia - 5,500 swordsmen; 2,000 horsemen; 3,000 foot soldiers
- new army: „Bastarnae Warriors“ - Bastarnae - 7,000 swordsmen; 1,500 horsemen; 4,000 foot soldiers
- "Pharos Fleet" lost 29 triremes
- "Cathage Battle fleet" surrendered
- "Cyrenaican Army" (Hamilcar Barca) annihilated
- "Alexander´s Army" lost 1,885 Hetaires; 615 horsemen; 1,145 swordsmen; 4,010 hoplites; 5,879 foot soldiers
- "Pharao´s Army" lost 590 war chariots; 3,354 horsemen; 1,098 swordsmen; 1,112 foot soldiers; 1,087 light infantry
- [Persia] „Persian Elite Guard“ lost 1,876 immortals
- Sicily spent 55 talents on building fortifications at Syracuse
- Bosporian Greek spent 50 talents to found the colony of Pityos

[Micha]

Originally posted by Lord Nuclear
The update has taken 27 hours now.

Three of which I spent drinking discussing politics ( ) and 11 hours I needed to get sober write my second doctoral thesis... ( )

Who is gonna challenge the Mod?

[Tassadar500]

To: Egypt
From: Carthage

WILL YOU NOW ACCEPT PEACE? You have ordered the destruction of both of our nations. Please accept peace, you must. We have nothing left to give you.

[laurentius]

GJ Michael

So what does Massilia, Niacea and Adria respond?

[Micha]

Greek Polii to Rome
While we are willing to sign a mutual defense pact and while we acknowledge your status as hegemonial power in the region, we cannot stretch our militaries so far to go after the vast northern hordes without significant Roman support.
We will of course assist in a joint army campaign if the Senate should decide so.

[laurentius]

Rome to Greek Polii

We understand your concerns and assure you no such thing will be done. In fact we were merely referring to the Southern Gauls between Nicae and Massilia. If you agree to this treaty our Legion II Italica will attack with you against these barbarians.

We seek only peace an in fact will in few years attempt to pacify the Rhodanus river Valley and proceed to Arausio with your help. That is all we want. If that succeeds the areas surrounding your Polii are pacified and safe and our Roman objectives are met. This is all we ask.

Of course the situation might change if a new barbarian horde crosses the alps or if the Aquileans start to move West...

What do you say?