The World Cup Excellent Adventure!!

[Boris Godunov]

Originally posted by Asher

You should be happy, I've found my part to be insulting.

Write your own then. That was the only way to salvage mine from talk of pink shoes.

[Ming]

The Angels found DanQ in the stadium bar drinking some multi colored drink with an umbrella in it... They joined him at the table...

So what's the plan Mr Q Ming asked.

A simple one... he responded. You two will wander the stadium and keep an eye out for the enemy. MLeonard has to meet up with Markos... Markos didn't tell me why, but just said he and MLeonard had to talk...
I will handle everything... as the referee for the big match, I will be in TOTAL control. This assignment is a piece of cake. Before you know it, the Turks will lose to Japan, and this mission will be over.

Great... MtG and I will find a place that has a good view of the crowd... MtG looked out the window of the stadium bar... This seems like a good enough place to me... WAITER...

DanQ headed down to the referee's locker room as MLeonard melted into the crowd in search of Markos...

As he sat in front of his locker in the dressing room, DanQ had to laugh... What an easy assignment he mused... The Turks won't know what hit them... He opened his locker and... Huh...

A figure dressed in black jumped out of the locker..

EVC... WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

EVC gave DanQ a big smile.... And you thought you were rid of me when Ming banned me... I am the greatest... I'm Number One... I'm your biggest nightmare... I am the World... I am the power... I am EVERYHING...

DanQ... uhhh... can you get on with it, you are delaying the story...

Oh... you pityfull human... bask in the glory of my power... and he smacks DanQ across the side of the head. He stuffs DanQ in the locker and dresses in the referee uniform. He activates his secret decoder ring and his face begins to change. His laugh can be heard throughout the locker room as he becomes a perfect duplicate of DanQ...

NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW... THE TURKS WILL WIN, AND THERE IS NOTHING THEY CAN DO TO STOP ME.

The match begins as Ming and MtG are getting hammered in the bar... Boy MtG... this is the easiest assignment we have ever had... drink, watch a great soccer match, and let DanQ do all the work...

In the 12th minute of the match, Umit Davala scores on a header off a corner kick to give the Turks a 1 - 0 lead.

Man... that DanQ is a real tease... He's letting the Turks get the lead before he puts the hammer down... He's just toying with them...

Yeah responded Ming... what a guy... Markos will be pleased as DanQ snatches victory away from the Turks... his revenge will be complete...

The Turks, launching several counterattacks, almost made it 2-0 in the 24th minute when a lofted pass found Hakan Sukur breaking into the box on the left. But his ambitious lob was kept out by Japanese goalie Seigo Narazaki.

Hmmm... I wonder what DanQ's plan is... Japan isn't looking too good here. Don't worry Ming responded, you can put this one in the bank... the Turks are toast...

Moments later, Sukur knocked the ball into the path of Hasan Sas, whose powerful shot from the edge of the penalty area flew over the bar.

Hmmm... Don't you think it's about time that DanQ did something...

The match continued on the wet and slippery field as the Turks were in total control of the match...

In the 41st minute of the match... on a free kick from the edge of the box, Santos gave it his best effort to tie the match, but his shot crashed off the crossbar...

Hmmm... something isn't right here... DanQ isn't doing anything...

Final score... Turks 1... Japan 0... The home town crowd was silent as they left the stadium in defeat...

I think we better go have a talk with DanQ...

[Ecthy]

where's my role?

[Solly]

With the loaf?

[Imran Siddiqui]

Boris: Good show!

---

The Battle

The Finns, in their hovercraft, for no apparent reason decided to go to Australia. At least it seemed like they had no apparent reason. As well all know, Finns like to go on joyrides from time to time. This was not one of those times. There was a mission here. They were to find GP, who had gotten very, very drunk and lost his submarine. Unfortunetly for the Finns, they did not know that at that moment, GP was bording a plane for Seoul. So the Finns were going for nothing. Of course this was all consistant with the Dark Lord's Plan.

The Dark Lord also foresaw that the Germans would try to disrupt the Finns, simply because of the German hatred for Stefu, which is well known throught the galaxy and several other multi-dimensions.

Rogan Josh was sitting in his vintage WW1 era U-Boat, now equipped with modern weaponry... like a disco ball and DVD player. Andz, his servant was busy doing important work, like mopping the floor.

Rogan: Soon, Andreas ve vill have the Finns and Stefu vill be ours for the taking! We will bring him to Berlin and ve vill be heroes!

Andz: Ve are going to be sandwiches?

Rogan: Not those heroes, you twit! Heroes like Hermann who stopped the evil Romans.

Andz: I kinda liked the Romans.

Rogan throws a DVD at Andz's head.

Rogan: Insolent youth. Ah, I think Stefu's hovercraft is within reach.

Andz: Vhy do you think that?

Rogan: Because that is what the script says! Don't you read your role, boy? For that you vill have to shine my shoes.

Andz: Ok.

Rogan: Ok Kaiser!

Andz: Ok, Kaiser.

Andz shines Rogan's shoes to a level that no man has ever shined before. He seems to have a knack for it. In another dimension, Andz would be shoe shining champion of the universe. Unfortunetly we don't have competition for shining shoes. Except Rogan, of couse.

Rogan: FASTER... you are slower than your best time!

Andz: (panting) Yes, Kaiser.

Rogan: Good, not far off your best. Now, go and pilot this submarine to meet with the Finns.

(On the Finnish Hovercraft)

Stefu: Ok, will everyone turn off their damned mobile phones!!

Kassiopeia: What? You don't like a mobile ringing every 3 seconds?

Stefu: NO! And will someone please put the Linux penguins in their cages. They are making a mess.

Lightening: Uh... Stefu. There seems to be something on the computer screen.

Stefu: Is that Windows?!! ARGH! We can only use Linux! Reboot!

Lightening: But!

Stefu: But nothing! What do you think we make sacrifices to Linus Torvalds for?

Lightening: Well...

Stefu: Don't question me!

Lightening sighed and slowly rebooted, but by that time a tickling torpedo was already coming full blast.

(On the U-Boat)

Rogan: Ha ha! Those Finns won't know what hit them! They'll be tickled until they fall over!

Andz: Yes, Kaiser, and then ve can rule the internet.

Rogan: Yessss. Vait? Vhat is that?!

Andz: Vhat?

Rogan points to a green spikey thing that is all ripped open. Andz inflates his chest.

Andz: That's my cactus. Had it since I was 3.

Rogan: Cactus?! That isn't German!

Andz: Neither is this DVD player, it was made in Japan!

Rogan: THAT'S NOT THE POINT! I don't want it on my bridge!

And with that Rogan snatched up the cactus, and ran to the bathroom and flushed it into the ocean.

Andz: NOOOOOOO! Cactus, I vill join you!!

Rogan: Vhat? Vhat are you doing?!

Andz prepared to dive. He was going to join his cactus on the bottom of the ocean. Of course the WW1 era sub can't handle the pressure that low. But Andz did not care... his cactus was lost. What did he have to live for now? Of course a good side effect, that bastard Rogan would go with him.

(On the Finn Hovercraft)

The Finns are fighting off the last of the Tickle Tornado.

Lightening: (giggle) They are diving!! But that sub won't be able to handle the pressure!

Stefu: It's a trick!! (giggle) We must dive to stop them!

Kassiopeia: (hehe) But sir.. this is a hovercraft (giggle). It can't dive.

Stefu: ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?!

Kassiopeia: No, it's the tickling. (giggle)

Stefu: Oh... I thought you were laughing at my girlish good looks.

Lightening stared.

Lightening: Girlish?

Stefu: (mutters) damn

The cabin erupts into laughter. Of course the Finns blame it on the tickle torpedo as Stefu, looking very girlish at the moment, gets redder and redder. Suddenly he exploded!

Stefu: DIVE NOW!

Lightening: But...

Stefu: I'll do it myself!

And with that the top secret hovercraft dove (more like fell into the ocean) and the Finns all drowned.

Let this be a lesson to you all... Finns and Germans only **** up a pretty interesting sounding battle on first glance. Of course this was all according to plan. Now both the Finns and Germans wouldn't be able to disrupt what was happening at the stadium..


Meanwhile at the Stadium, while all the patrons were about to leave, all exits were closed with a wierd, not of this world, substance. There was no way out, and everyone was trapped. Suddenly an announcement ordered all people back into their seats. The Dark Lord had arrived and had a show to perform. Imran hoped it would include clowns. He liked clowns. However, he doubted that it would be the case. Of course Imran was wrong, the show would include clowns, if you consider Ming and MtG to be them.

[Ecthy]

You misspelled my username.

[OzzyKP]

Ozzy - uhh...point of order?

Siro - what?

Ozzy - i've got a question.

Siro - oh, go ahead.

Ozzy - I'm not a huge soccer fan, and I suppose i've been busy spreading libertarianism, but weren't we at the Turkey/Brazil game?

Siro - I believe so..

Ozzy - well when did we get to Turkey/Japan?

Siro - erm... well, uh...

Imran - ya see Ozzy, its all due to the hyper-galactic, defibulating coaxile, apolyton time warp machine, that allows the past, future and present to just kinda twist in and out while having no direct connection whatsoever.

Ozzy - ummm.....

Siro - Also because Ming has a big banning stick and we don't want to point out that he is at the wrong game.

Ozzy - ahhh

[Ecthy]

And my accent is not nearly that bad. For evidence, I'll record a read-out of one of those lines

[Imran Siddiqui]

Ozzy:

Ecthelion, read the first post where you make an apperance. And for this story, you accent is that bad .

[Ecthy]

there's another one?

[Imran Siddiqui]

Another what?

[Ecthy]

post with me in it. where is it?

[Ming]

Markos watched in horror from his sky box as the Turks easily defeated the home team...

His temper tantrum caused the other people in the box to move away from him as the match ended...

I'M GOING TO KILL THAT CRAZY CANADIAN... WHERE IS MING... WHERE IS MTG... WHERE ARE THE COMMUNISTS... WHERE ARE THE HOMOSEXUALS... THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING.... WHINE... WHINE... WHINE...

A cloud passes in front of the sun... the sky darkens... there seems to be a disturbance by the exits...
The Door to the Skybox opens...

In marches MLeonard... Dressed in a dark robe with a hood that is covering most of his face... He looks older than one would expect for his teenage years...

Markos stares... and then begins to mumble...

YOU HAVE FAILED ME FOR THE LAST TIME MARKOS...

Markos prostates himself at the feet of MLeonard...

OH MASTER... I DID MY VERY BEST... I REALLY TRIED...

SILENCE FOOL...

But Master...

MLeonard pulls back the hood... a hush fell across the sky box... IT'S THE EMPEROR!

I gave you an easy task Markos... and you failed.
But master...

ENOUGH... as we speak the stadium is now under my control. The exits have been locked. I will now address my subjects...

The glass on the sky box explodes outward... and the emperor levitates himself through the window and rises above the masses in the stadium... the noise in the stadium is silenced as all the frightened people look up and see the great figure above them. WITNESS MY POWER HE BEGINS...

Back in the bar... Ming and MtG look up and see MLeonard rising above the crowd...
HOLY **** He's not just some lowly mod... HE'S THE EMPEROR! They hear is opening words and suddenly, a bright flash... and both of them are changed into two strange looking bozo clowns... WHAT THE HELL... Their bodies float out of the bar as they rise to meet the Emperor....

[OzzyKP]

On a tarmack outside of Washington, DC the Youth Rights Knights assemble.

Knight 1 - Where's Tommy?

Knight 2 - his mom grounded him, he couldn't make it out.

Knight 1 - crap, and what of Suzi, Billy, and 'Sir Rich'?

Knight 2 - Suzi is having trouble making it here, they just raised the driving age so she doesn't have a license.

Knight 1 - Well can Billy pick her up?

Knight 2 - Well the law prohibits more than 1 passenger for us teens, and Billy already is taking Sir Rich.

Knight 1 - damn bastards. So how many do we have?

Knight 2 - fourteen, but umm... we're gonna have a problem making it to Korea.

Knight 1 - why's that?

Knight 2 - cause there is some restriction about traveling while under 18, we can't get a plane ticket.

Knight 1 - damn! they've thought of everything! We are on an important mission to save the world from Communist Greek Homosexuals and we are too young to gt a plane ticket. Bastards.

Knight 2 - lets call el Presidente.

*whips out his cell and punches a call to Korea*

Ozzy - hello?

Knight 1 - hail Lord Ozzy!

Ozzy - oh, uh hello Knight 1, umm, i mean Sir Jimbo.

Sir Jimbo - we have problem, age restrictions are keeping us from getting to Korea. Any ideas?

Ozzy - yea, well you can probably hitch a ride with the Liberty Commandos, they are sending their exclusive A.-T.E.A.M. unit to assist. Their supersonic jet should get here lickety split. I'll tell them to pick you guys up.

Sir Jimbo - Hail!

Ozzy - uh, yea... hail... keep up the good work.

*click*

Sir Jimbo to Knight 2 - now if only we can ensure the A.-T.E.A.M. doesn't get charged with kidnapping and we can make it home before dinner.

[OzzyKP]

Siro- Ozzy, you just posted, don't get over-zealous.

Ozzy - yea i know, just a short teaser. I'm bored...

Siro- ok...

==================

In their evil and bright red hide out along the Korean border Chegitz inspects his troops. Waiting for the moment they have waited for.

Kamrat X - Comrade Chegitz, the night owl has left his perch, repeat, the night owl has left his perch.

Chegitz - wha?

Kamrat - ya know, the thing down in S. Korea with the World Cup and the Emporer and such?

Chegitz - oh yea! But why has the Emporer revealed himself, the plan was to hold the Turks hostage?

Kamrat - oh, didn't you get the memo? Mr. Q's mission failed. It was posted by Ming just a bit ago.

Chegitz - oh well it is time to move the troops then. Is General Dalgetti's infiltration of the opposition successful?

Kamrat - yes comrade, he awaits your orders.

Chegitz - good....

*evil cackle ending in akward post evil laugh silence ala Dr. Evil*

Provost Harrison runs into the encampment with a special message.

Provost - Sir! Reports are coming in that the Libertarian Hordes contingent, the A.-T.E.A.M., and a bunch of knighted young punks are on their way to the stadium to cut us off. Also it seems GP has recovered from his drunken stupor and is bringing the sub north to engage.

Chegitz - ah yes... things are still going according to plan. Just... complicated a bit.

Kamrat - well uh... things are going well, but I have two questions. How will we get the troops across the border and what about the Multiplayer Muppets?

Chegitz - ah yes..... the muppets....

(continue)

As the epic story winds down to its climactic...uh.. climax, what role will the infamous multiplayer muppets play? What side are they even on? How will the dynamic final show down *hint hint* between the forces of communism and liberty turn out? And where did I put that balogna sandwich?

These questions and more to be answered in the next chapter of....

THE WORLD CUP EXCELLENT ADVENTURE!!!!!