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  • #91
    Originally posted by Boris Godunov
    Ming: Naw, y'all seem to be doing ok by yourselves, I wouldn't want to destroy plot continuity with my rather Dickensesque writing style.

    Imran: Don't you even think about hooking me up with MrFun. One of my key requirements in men is a sense of humor.

    And all I have to say is this: There better not be at any time a point where the Boris clones get it on with each other. That would just be disturbing.

    *glances at mirror*

    Hmmm...or would it?

    *flexes bicep in mirror*

    Oooooh...
    Well.. the best way to insure that nothing funny happens to you is to write it yourself... glances at mirror... or I should say... since something funny will happen, you might as well be in charge. we need more writers... your style can't be any worse than mine.

    Just jump right in...
    Keep on Civin'
    RIP rah, Tony Bogey & Baron O

    Comment


    • #92
      Imran: Don't you even think about hooking me up with MrFun. One of my key requirements in men is a sense of humor.


      Don't worry... never in a million years .
      “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
      - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

      Comment


      • #93
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        Exult in your existence, because that very process has blundered unwittingly on its own negation. Only a small, local negation, to be sure: only one species, and only a minority of that species; but there lies hope. [...] Stand tall, Bipedal Ape. The shark may outswim you, the cheetah outrun you, the swift outfly you, the capuchin outclimb you, the elephant outpower you, the redwood outlast you. But you have the biggest gifts of all: the gift of understanding the ruthlessly cruel process that gave us all existence [and the] gift of revulsion against its implications.
        -Richard Dawkins

        Comment


        • #94
          Starchild


          Good to see you joining in
          Keep on Civin'
          RIP rah, Tony Bogey & Baron O

          Comment


          • #95


            SC: is that secure area you house perchance ?
            “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
            - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

            Comment


            • #96
              If by house you mean secret lair of many chains, then yes.

              Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.
              Exult in your existence, because that very process has blundered unwittingly on its own negation. Only a small, local negation, to be sure: only one species, and only a minority of that species; but there lies hope. [...] Stand tall, Bipedal Ape. The shark may outswim you, the cheetah outrun you, the swift outfly you, the capuchin outclimb you, the elephant outpower you, the redwood outlast you. But you have the biggest gifts of all: the gift of understanding the ruthlessly cruel process that gave us all existence [and the] gift of revulsion against its implications.
              -Richard Dawkins

              Comment


              • #97
                OOC: ROFL @ Starchild and Boris.

                (somewhere in Germany)
                (somewhere in Berlin)
                (somewhere on Leipzig St. 45)
                (somewhere in the basement)

                Rogan Josh: Andreas? Vhere are you, Andreas?

                Andz: I'm here my liege. I'm called Ecthelion now, my liege.

                Rogan: Your father-given name is Andreas. It is your name. Let's not deal wiz nonsense, shall we?

                Andz: But what's the problem with calling me Ecthelion? It's cool!

                Rogan: Come, I said! I shall have none of dis! You obey!

                Andz looks humiliated to the floor: Alright. Obviously my liege.

                Rogan: Now we have to vipe the history of our shameful decline in the 20th century.

                Andz: You mean? We have to recreate the Reich?

                Rogan: No, vi shall recreate the Empire.

                Andz: huh?

                Rogan: How dare you hum at royalty! Have you forgotten already! I'm the illegal second grand child of the Keiser!

                Andz: Yes, of course my liege.

                Rogan: The last person who laffed at me was Comrade Dan. You don't see much ov him lately, do you?

                Andz: Of course not, my liege.

                Rogan: Good. I have a plan. My intelligence tells me that the Vinnish have developed a combat hovercraft. Do you know vat it means?

                Andz: That they have way too much free time on their hands?

                Rogan: Vell… dat is true, but also, that ve must defeat it! And to do that, we shall use what our forefathers used!

                Andz: A racist supremacist ideology?

                Rogan: No, what are ve, Israelis? We use U-Boats!

                Andz: What?

                Rogan: Sbumarines. Don't you vatch cheesy American summer movies?

                Andz: No my liege. I will begin right away.

                Rogan: No, after we are done. Prepare the boat, we have Finnish to hunt. And shine my shoes while you're at it!

                (fade out)

                Comment


                • #98
                  *Natan swoops down on Siro, Imran, and co., while dressed in complete Ayatollah Khomeini costume*

                  Natan: Brother Imran! You have defiled yourself! You must pay the price!

                  Imran: Who? What?

                  Natan: In my capacity as head of the Popular Front for the Violent Liberation of American Goods from Middle Eastern Department Store Display Cases, I demand that you turn over the porn and ham immediately. And the schnapps too. You are under people's arrest for this behavior which is harmful to public morals.

                  Imran, brandishing bottle: From these cold dead fingers . . .

                  Siro: Natan? Natan?

                  Natan: Quiet! This is on highest orders from the leaders of our people!

                  Siro: You mean our teacher, master, and leader Ariel Sharon, may he live long and be blessed?

                  Natan: No, he's just a figurehead. History049, known to the masses by his Hebrew nickname Bob Dornan, is really in charge. And he's a Commie. He has ordered me to foil your plans through my Islamic fundamentalist movement which is really a communist front.

                  Siro: I think I'm going to cry.

                  Natan: Imran, you'd better behave yourself, or I'll send you to the Party Sub-committee for the Liberation of the Heads of Evildoers From Their Oppressive Capitalist Torsos.

                  Imran: Never! I'll show you what a real Pakistani-American libertarian deist college undergrad is made of . . .

                  * Natan grabs Imran in one arm, while holding schnaps in the other. Removes turban to reveal yarmolke, which sprouts electric beenie. Natan flies away with Imran while swigging alcohol *

                  Siro: Don't you know better than to drink and fly?

                  * Natan crashes into adjacent field, releasing Imran *

                  Natan: We leftists will foil your plans yet! Bwahahaha!

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    By this point, Boris had completely lost track of MrFun, who was determined to find the poor, lost kitten. Boris huffed in irritation. Everything was NOT going according to plan.

                    Somewhat dejectedly, Boris trundled down the maze of corridors under the Stadium, trying to think of a way to salvage the situation. MrFun had the sleep inducer, so Boris couldn't knock out the Turkish players and kidnap them. While he could still use his awesome Invisihomo (TM) powers, what point would there be if all he could do was just secretly look at the half naked socc---

                    Boris immediately made himself invisible, turned around and raced towards the locker rooms.
                    Tutto nel mondo è burla

                    Comment


                    • Siro: History049 has gone red? How could that be?

                      Natan: Beats me - but hey, he just turned 15. He's a teenager. Can you spell Moodswings.

                      Siro: M - u - d - s

                      Imran: Stop that.

                      Siro: Sorry.

                      Natan: So will you help me?

                      Siro: I have to choose between my loyalty to the country and my loyalty to the plot...

                      Imran: Come on, we made plans! It's a beautiful finish that we have instore.

                      Natan: Two words - World Domination. Three worlds - Jewish World Domination.

                      Siro: Oh GOD! I can't choose this! Help!!

                      Suddenly Natan falls to his knees and cries : "I hear you oh blessed is your name" as a beam of light strikes him from the heavens.

                      Siro and Imran stare at each other and then stare at Natan.

                      Natan: aha... yeah... ok... but I.... but I... ok... yeah... ahhh.. oooh... good.

                      Siro: I'm afraid to ask.

                      Imran: Ok, I think I'm going back to being religious.

                      Natan: aha, ok I was told not to interefere with your plans. It'll work itself out for the best I'll go to inform our leader.

                      Siro: But what did he say.

                      Natan: Sorry son, you should have read your Talmud better.

                      Siro: What??? What??

                      Natan takes out a donkey out of nowhere and rides to an undiscolsed location.

                      Imran: Ok, you know, I once doubted the jews being the chosen people and so on, you know...

                      Siro: and...

                      Imran: And now I lost all respect for you guys. I mean, you're total wakos. People of the book my ass. You're crazy.

                      reismark: Hey look it's MarkG?

                      Imran: Where?

                      The three run inside the stadium.

                      Comment


                      • After racing inside, Imran, Reismark and Siro were bewildered to see MarkG had vanished.

                        Imran: Now where the hell did he go?

                        Siro: Vanished again...maybe he IS a mirage...

                        Reismark: I hear footsteps to the left! Let's go!

                        The trio took off down the left passageway. Just as they rounded a corner, Imran ran head first into something unseen and was thrown back on his ass, knocking the other two down with him. As the collected their wits (a quick process, of course), they looked up to see Boris sprawled out on the floor in front of them. Having come into contact with human flesh, his Invisihomo was suddenly deactivated.

                        Boris: (Feeling his face) No damage? Ah! Good...

                        Imran, Siro and Reismark in Unison: BORIS!!!

                        Boris sprang up from the floor, and then gritted his teeth in disgust. The Repugnicans.

                        Boris: So! You three think you can foil our plans? Don't think you can stop me, you bastards!

                        Imran: You'll never make the world safe for social justice while we're around, Boris Badunov!

                        Siro: Ha! Good one, Imran! Badunov! Just like in Rocky and Bullwinkle. Cute play on "Godunov," yeah!

                        *Imran stares coldly at Siro*

                        Siro: Um, sorry, I'll, um, just be quiet.

                        Reismark: Can I do something?

                        All: No!

                        Imran: Your commie games end here, Boris!

                        With that, Imran drew from his pants...(heehee)...a gleaming scimitar! Siro and Reismark "ooohed" in appreciaton.

                        Boris: You call that a sword? This...is a sword...

                        And with that, Boris drew from his pants the largest bastard sword anyone had ever seen. Siro and Reismark gasped in awe, while Imran's eyes widened in fear.

                        Boris: Let's to it pell-mell. If not to heaven, then hand-in-hand to Hell.

                        Imran: Huh?

                        Boris: (rolling his eyes). Shakespeare, doofus. En garde!

                        And Boris lunged...
                        Tutto nel mondo è burla

                        Comment


                        • Siro (confused): What is this some kind of a thing communist gay men have about having the biggest tools?

                          * meanwhile, in N. Korea *

                          Dalgetti, Faded Glory and Chris62 are walking searching for communists.

                          Chris: I knew it. It's all the muslims fault.

                          Dal: huh?

                          FG: It's all dem terrorists. And you know they be muslims. Word.

                          Dal: English please.

                          Chris: Well obviously this is another one of Imran's plots. Ramo too. Them and the communists are all evil.

                          While he said this FG took a big American flag and started waving it around with pride.

                          After he continued it for a few minutes, the team felt it was time to talk about it.

                          Chris: Whatch'a doin'?

                          FG: I'm waving the American flag.

                          Chris: We can see that. Why?

                          FG: I'm proud of my country!

                          Chris: Why now? We're in enemy terrotiry.

                          FG: Hey, I'm a free man, and this symbolises my freedom. It's protected under my constitutional right!

                          Chris: Let me refer you to the definition of 'camouflage' : to decieve the enemy by means of disguise or hiding.

                          FG: But I'm proud, I'm brave, and I'm free.

                          Chris: You're stupid. Now give me the flag!

                          Dalgetti: Give me the pole. I want to ... measure something.

                          Chris: Now you stop that!

                          (cutout)

                          Comment


                          • ...and lunged and lunged again.

                            While totally straight and secure in his manhood, Reismark began to understand the appeal men have for homosexuals. Though not for himself of course, but he understands....
                            Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012

                            When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah

                            Comment


                            • (ozzy, while you predate me on the forums, i hardly know you, therefore it's tough for me to write you in, since i know little about you.

                              perhaps you could write yourself in? )

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Sirotnikov
                                (ozzy, while you predate me on the forums, i hardly know you, therefore it's tough for me to write you in, since i know little about you.

                                perhaps you could write yourself in? )
                                Thats cause I stay away from Mid-East threads. And despite my best efforts you OT folks never seem to acknowledge my presence.

                                And I already wrote myself in, didn't you read my post about the Libertarian Hordes?

                                I'm the Youth Rights, Metalhead, Libertarian, CNN Appearing fella.
                                Captain of Team Apolyton - ISDG 2012

                                When I was younger I thought curfews were silly, but now as the daughter of a young woman, I appreciate them. - Rah

                                Comment

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