The Dumbasses Are Out In Force (Pekka and GT, also small guys who fight look here)

[Space05us]

My welcoming into the 'grown up' social life of Barrow, Alaska is being harassed by drunks and *******s. So far this week Ive been threatened verbaly and through gesture, both times by guys who would normaly be able to kick my ass like swatting a fly. This is where you guys come in. Im a small guy and have never really fought before in my life however its quickly becoming apparent that I will be in a fight soon. Most likely with guys twice to three times my size, since they are so bad ass they need to pick on us passive weak folk. I already have my posse, my gang, whatever to back me up and protect me, but they wont always be around and I'll eventualy have to prove my manhood ( ).

Teach me the effective (and tried if possible) ways to quickly neutralize a person bigger than me.

[KrazyHorse]

[Chemical Ollie]

Run

[Space05us]

Maybe I should have stated that no one up here fights with weapons since everyone is somehow related.

[Space05us]

Run

I cant run forever, there not always an opportunity to run, and I dont want to run.

[KrazyHorse]

I suggest you offer him a blowjob, and when he accepts you bite his dick off.

[Ben Kenobi]

Convince him that he has nothing to gain by fighting you.

If he beats you, considering how small you are, then what glory is there for him?

He can only lose by fighting, and by not fighting, maintains his position.

As for your manhood, obviously he's the better man since he can easily beat you in a fight.

[KrazyHorse]

I like my solutions more than yours.

[KrazyHorse]

Originally posted by Space05us
Maybe I should have stated that no one up here fights with weapons since everyone is somehow related.

...which means that you're likely to win, no?

[Space05us]

If he beats you, considering how small you are, then what glory is there for him?

I dont think drunks understand glory, honor, respect, any of those things. Nor do I think they are very convincible.

[Nubclear]

......

[KrazyHorse]

Ignore Ben.

Don't fight if you don't have to (i.e. don't start a fight). If you do have to:

a) If you're fighting a drunk idiot, he's likely to take a massive right hook as his first shot. If he does, keep your left guard up (your fist should be touching near your temple and your elbow tucked in against your side protecting your ribs). Step into him as his punch comes toward you (inside his punch; he should miss completely behind your head). Deliver a straight punch to his mouth with your right.

b) Don't make the same mistakes he just did. Keep your punches quick and tight. Return your fists immediately to your guard.

c) Keep moving. Don't stand there and slug. If he's bigger than you he'll destroy you this way.

d) Punch in combinations. Jab with the left, deliver a quick hook with the right, short but powerful uppercut with the left.

e) If you know any wrestling, you can use any time you're inside his guard to deliver a standing hip toss. Then either kick the **** out of him while remaining standing or control him on the ground (best position is for him to be stomach down and you squatting on top of him) while punching him whenever you get the chance.

[KrazyHorse]

Oh, and keep your head up. He's going to rock your world with an uppercut if you try to protect your face by pointing it downward.

Also, don't fall down when he hits you. Half of a fight is being psychologically prepared to get hit.

[Drake Tungsten]

e) If you know any wrestling, you can use any time you're inside his guard to deliver a standing hip toss. Then either kick the **** out of him while remaining standing or control him on the ground (best position is for him to be stomach down and you squatting on top of him) while punching him whenever you get the chance.

**** the hip-toss. Go right for the single-leg and then get him in the ***** stretcher...

[Chemical Ollie]

Stay home at nights, surfing 'Poly, until you get a chance to leave that craphole forever.