"I don't know if I'm in love with you any more..."

[Stuie]

Wow, Guy... this totally sucks. Definitely take the time you guys need to sort things out. I know it all hurts, but it's better to work through this before you're married than to have it crop up five years down the line.

Take care.

[Spiffor]

DanielXY:
I think you forgot one thing. She may be confused, and have shared her confusion. Women aren't creatures of rationality like we do. It is extremely common for them to speak while they think. As such, one shouldn't consider what they say as something calculated, especially in love matters.

Had Guynemer been going to marry a man, what you say would probably be relevant. But with a woman, it is very possible that her "I don't know" mean "I don't know" for real, and is a result of stress and confusion.

[DanielXY]

Yes, I agree Woman are most of the time confused and such with love matters and decide according to their emotions, etc.
But the blackmail thing as well as the usuall nice-breakup text is quite common I supose...

[Guynemer]

I want to thank all of you* for your support. It means a lot to me.



* = expect Spinky. **** off, *******.

[Solly]

The censor sure is working well!

[Q Classic]

hope things work out...

[MrFun]

Originally posted by Park Avenue
She's feckin someone else. Sorry.

Yeah -- because you have proof of this, right?


In any event, what a lame, tasteless joke.

[Japher]

@PA

If she is being honest, which I think she is, than she is probably not fecking someone else... Just goes to show how little PA really knows about women. They are evil and sinister, but in more of a "nails on the chalkboard" kind of way.

[Solly]

Yeah -- because you have proof of this, right?

It's in the thread title.

[Guynemer]

Horse****.

If you have even a shred of human decency, something which I doubt very much, you will stop posting in this thread.

[Solly]

Hey. Don't shoot the messenger. I feel for you.

[Spiffor]

Guy: why do you keep discussing with him? He only wants to drive you nuts, and there is no telling he actually thinks that way.

Just ignore him

[Drogue]

No you don't. You have no idea what's going on in his fiancee's head. You can fall out of love without it involving someone else. Moreover, you can question the nature of your relationship, and your own feelings, without falling out of love.

Having jitters before your wedding is quite normal. When added to the ungodly stress she's under, and the conflict she'll feel from her depression, feeling like that seems almost understandable, in the sense that part of her could feel that she doesn't deserve to be with you, and part of her probably feels scared that she'll mess it up and hurt both you and her.

Given the circumstances that she's said this, the stress, the depression and the bereavement, she may be subconciously trying to convince herself that she doesn't love you, because she's scared, as a defensive/safety reaction.

The chances of someone feeling something like that having wishing a relationship with someone else is very small. Add to that that she wants to try to save things with counselling, and I would very much doubt that there is. I have seen people who are depressed going and having flings with someone else, as a defensive reaction, however that has been in different situations, and not when they show a willingness to try to make it work. I have never seen someone in that state of mind and relationship having another relationship. I think Spink is talking out of his ass. Not only is his accusations completely unfounded, the situation would seem to suggest it less likely. We're not shooting the messenger. You're stirring something that doesn't exist, and it appears trolling where you really shouldn't be. I don't think you're that malicious, so I think you're misguided, but either way, it doesn't help.

Guy, it absolutely sucks what you're going through. I hope I never have to feel like that, as I can't imagine the extent it would hurt. All I can advise is to be there for her and help her to see her feelings. Whatever happens from here, I would doubt that she means what she says, and as Verres said, she's almost certainly confused or scared and doesn't know what she's feeling. I don't know her, of course, but I would think the circumstances, and her depression, is more likely behind what she said than any true change of feeling. I wish you all the best.

[Arrian]

Originally posted by Spiffor
Guy: why do you keep discussing with him? He only wants to drive you nuts, and there is no telling he actually thinks that way.

Just ignore him

Excellent advice. Trust me, the forum is a better experience this way.

-Arrian

[Tingkai]

Hi Guy, I hope everything turns out okay for you and your fiancee. It's probably just all the stress: two deaths, the pressure of a wedding, the medication and everything else. That's pretty heavy duty stuff. Hopefully you can work things out.