how many is too many

[Ben Kenobi]

Maybe I should switch to Mariah Carey...

[Potassium]

... o_O Ahem. Getting back on track.

One of my good friends has slept with over 20. I don't remember the real number. He'll be turning 19 this year. gg

Anything over 15 is a little excessive.

[Drogue]

Originally posted by boann
its been posed to me that men prefer women lie about it. what do you all think about that?

I wouldn't care as long as she was truthful about it. I don't think it matters how many people you've slept with, but I would want to know that when it comes to sensitive things, they could be honest with me. If they feel they have to lie, then doesn't that mean they would be having a relationship under false pretences? It does depend on the bloke, but I would never want a girl I'm with to lie to me, however painful they think it would be to me.

[duke o' york]

This is one question that everyone lies about, but as a rule, men tend to add to the real total, while women subtract from it.

Society's dumb isn't it.

[Drogue]

I don't think everyone lies. I didn't, and I most people I know don't feel the need to. It's not a better or worse thing to have more or less, IMHO, and so there is no reason to lie.

However, I do agree somewhat with flipsides comment:

How many people have you ever slept with that you really, well......, liked a lot?
If that answer is more than five I woud be more upset than if you had slept with one hundred.
There is, obviously, a real difference between love and finding someone sexually attractive.

I wouldn't mind too much if someone had been in love repeatedly, but it might make me feel a little weird. Certainly more so than if they've slept with many random people.

[Jamski]

Heh, reminds me of the "Andy French Factor" from Mary Whitehouse Experience.

Men are allowed to multiply by 10 and/or increase by one order of significancy. Example :

1 time holding hands - we kissed 10 times
1 kiss - she let me touch her breasts !
Made out with one girl - had sex with 10.

Get it?

The only exception to the rule was Andy French, because 0 x 10 = 0 still

-Jam

[Dry]

Honestly... her x should be less than mine.
Hum, ... no,... let's not be honest, let's be nice...
her x should be less than twice mine.
That's really too much.

[Sikander]

Originally posted by boann
wondering if age is also a factor.
i mean if your only 20 and youve been with 30
then ... well thats a lot to me for that age.
but if your 70 and 30 is your number... well
i don't know... i think it wouldn't matter so much..
what do you think?

I agree about age. I'm 42 and have been with over 30 (at least, it's hard to make an accurate count as so many were when I was wasted) but less than 50 I'm pretty sure. I first had intercourse at 13 years of age, so that's just over one per year which doesn't seem so bad. I've been only with my girlfriend for the past 6 years, and there have been a few dry spells where I didn't have any sex at all in a particular year. I should make a distribution chart.

[Sikander]

Originally posted by Sprayber

Yeah I hate those guys that are around 30 or so and go after those 18 year olds

I know, it makes us 40 year olds really work for that 18 year old poon.

[Sikander]

Originally posted by Ben Kenobi
Well, I'd like a virgin.

I believe the bidding for Rosie is over 13,000 pounds. Good luck.

[Sikander]

Originally posted by boann
its been posed to me that men prefer women lie about it. what do you all think about that?

I never prefer a lie, but then again I never trade stats with my girlfriends either. At my age it's obvious that we've both been around a bit and their is no reason to make anyone jealous or create a "short arms" race.

[Jon Miller]

I think it depends upon age

and time frame

if someone has been having sex since they were 14, and they were 28 (probably the oldest I would date)

over 30 would not be too high

but if they had been having sex since 23 (my age) and were 28, I would probably think over 30 was high and would look more closely

and of course, fewer is for the most part better (although circumstances also matter, 5 boyfreinds are a lot better than 5 one-night stands)

Jon Miller

[boann]

well see i sort of think so too
i wonder about the logic some have said that
they prefer someone to have been with several
one nighters rather than several that they loved.

so some of you would rather be with the kind of person that doesn't look for love in order to be intimate?

i would rather be with someone with a large number of past loves rather than be with someone who had been with a bunch of whores or one nighters.

[Drogue]

I think there's more to live up to if someone had been in love many times before. I don't really mind whether the person I'm with has to have feelings for that person in order to be intimate. If someone has had a load of one-night stands before, you'd still feel special that it wasn't like that with you. However if someone has had many meaningful relationships before, then it might feel so special. It would be a bit corny to say there's a difference between having sex and making love, but that is really what I mean. If they have had sex for fun many times, then the chances are it would be completely different for them to make love to someone they care about. If they have already made love to many people, it maybe wouldn't seem so special.

Likewise with fidelity in a relationship. If someone I was with cheated on me as a one night stand, while I would be very upset, it wouldn't necessarily have to end the relationship (unless there was an underlying problem leading to it). However if someone had an affair, as in a relationship with another person while we were together, then I'm not sure I could continue it. Knowing that they gave in to a moment of weakness is one thing. Knowing they wantonly decided they'd rather be with someone else is quite another.

[Jon Miller]

but a number of one night stands would show someone was prone to one night stands, right?

JOn Miller