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  • #31
    Originally posted by Lorizael View Post
    My awkwardness, though clearly a detriment to my success generally, played no rule in the cessation of activities here. I called it off because it got weird and complicated very quickly, such that no sex was definitely superior to this sex. In all honesty sex is not that important to me. It's physical closeness I miss most. If I were presented with a choice between (a) someone I could **** at my leisure or (b) someone I could hold hands with and lie next to from time to time, it would be a very easy choice.
    How do you lie next to someone and hold hands and that not lead to sex?
    "I hope I get to punch you in the face one day" - MRT144, Imran Siddiqui
    'I'm fairly certain that a ban on me punching you in the face is not a "right" worth respecting." - loinburger

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    • #32
      Originally posted by MRT144 View Post
      Yes, Yes, As unsafe as the people involved, no, different amd not what I prefer, no, no, no.
      I want to amend and agree with ming - some great sex was casual but the thought of the process to go through is daunting now that itd have be great, reason being, having been with my wife for 10 years almost and I dont have to do anything really to be intimate with her. Some people feed off the exploration and newness, but the stuff I'd have to do

      1. Put myself in situations to meet women
      2. Like their personality
      3. Be attracted to them on some level beyond personality

      Seems like a lot of work now.
      "I hope I get to punch you in the face one day" - MRT144, Imran Siddiqui
      'I'm fairly certain that a ban on me punching you in the face is not a "right" worth respecting." - loinburger

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      • #33
        Originally posted by MRT144 View Post
        How do you lie next to someone and hold hands and that not lead to sex?
        If I'm actively trying not to have sex for whatever reason, I just let my brain do its thing and take me to some alternate world where I'm having an intense argument about the meaning of life with a girl I saw on the bus once ten years ago or something. That's my default brain mode. Staying in the moment and interested takes effort.
        Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
        "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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        • #34
          Originally posted by Lorizael View Post
          If I'm actively trying not to have sex for whatever reason, I just let my brain do its thing and take me to some alternate world where I'm having an intense argument about the meaning of life with a girl I saw on the bus once ten years ago or something. That's my default brain mode. Staying in the moment and interested takes effort.
          Intimacy begets intimacy.
          "I hope I get to punch you in the face one day" - MRT144, Imran Siddiqui
          'I'm fairly certain that a ban on me punching you in the face is not a "right" worth respecting." - loinburger

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          • #35
            Yes, it is a rather vicious circle, isn't it?
            Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
            "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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            • #36
              Yes
              Yes
              Not if you are responsible
              No, if it feels good do it, with another consenting, informed adult
              Can be better or worse, all depends
              No
              Nope
              Nada, sorry you went through that, now get out and get on with your life.
              (\__/)
              (='.'=)
              (")_(") This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny into your signature to help him gain world domination.

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              • #37
                Originally posted by Giancarlo View Post
                Some of these posts lol. I'm glad I'm gay... Even in my relationship there is less of a hangup on sex. We know each other well enough to be honest... Certainly not using sex to gain leverage over the other lol.
                Not sure what this is about, to be honest. Don't recall anyone mentioning using sex as leverage. Don't get me wrong; I have a ****ed up relationship history, but honesty about physical intimacy was never where the problems lay.
                Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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                • #38
                  Originally posted by Lorizael View Post
                  Not sure what this is about, to be honest. Don't recall anyone mentioning using sex as leverage. Don't get me wrong; I have a ****ed up relationship history, but honesty about physical intimacy was never where the problems lay.
                  Let's just say guys understand guys better and we don't lie about ****. At least that is my experience. Being gay isn't all wonderful... some love to cause drama, but my relationship is one of open communication.
                  For there is [another] kind of violence, slower but just as deadly, destructive as the shot or the bomb in the night. This is the violence of institutions -- indifference, inaction, and decay. This is the violence that afflicts the poor, that poisons relations between men because their skin has different colors. - Bobby Kennedy (Mindless Menance of Violence)

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                  • #39
                    Well, good for you and your relationship, I guess. I just don't know what the relevance to the thread is. Nevertheless, I'm confident that gay relationships are filled with just as much ****ed up bull**** as straight relationships, because gay people are people, too.
                    Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                    "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by Lorizael View Post
                      Well, good for you and your relationship, I guess. I just don't know what the relevance to the thread is. Nevertheless, I'm confident that gay relationships are filled with just as much ****ed up bull**** as straight relationships, because gay people are people, too.
                      Oh sure. But he and I are more at the same wave length. Far easier to talk with each other way.
                      For there is [another] kind of violence, slower but just as deadly, destructive as the shot or the bomb in the night. This is the violence of institutions -- indifference, inaction, and decay. This is the violence that afflicts the poor, that poisons relations between men because their skin has different colors. - Bobby Kennedy (Mindless Menance of Violence)

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                      • #41
                        Originally posted by Lorizael View Post
                        Well, good for you and your relationship, I guess. I just don't know what the relevance to the thread is.
                        Hmmm... I had the same response when I was reading his post
                        Keep on Civin'
                        RIP rah, Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                        • #42
                          My point was about what sex is to me.

                          And I did talk about casual sex.
                          Last edited by Giancarlo; September 5, 2016, 11:32.
                          For there is [another] kind of violence, slower but just as deadly, destructive as the shot or the bomb in the night. This is the violence of institutions -- indifference, inaction, and decay. This is the violence that afflicts the poor, that poisons relations between men because their skin has different colors. - Bobby Kennedy (Mindless Menance of Violence)

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                          • #43
                            I want to see moar emotion and curse words out of you guise. Let the hate FLOW through you. None of this weak-sauce.

                            Thanks!
                            Order of the Fly

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                            • #44
                              Originally posted by Giancarlo View Post
                              Oh sure. But he and I are more at the same wave length. Far easier to talk with each other way.
                              Well, that's one of the reasons why I've always avoided casual sex. I am not good at intimacy in general, so I've never wanted to be physically intimate with anyone I wasn't good at communicating with.
                              Click here if you're having trouble sleeping.
                              "We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones." - François de La Rochefoucauld

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                              • #45
                                Fair enough.
                                For there is [another] kind of violence, slower but just as deadly, destructive as the shot or the bomb in the night. This is the violence of institutions -- indifference, inaction, and decay. This is the violence that afflicts the poor, that poisons relations between men because their skin has different colors. - Bobby Kennedy (Mindless Menance of Violence)

                                Comment

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