Weird conversation with girlfriend.

[Wernazuma III]

That's heresy!

(I actually do cook though I prefer to do big meal like BBQ, Thanksgiving, etc.. instead of the little every day meals.)

BBQ

When a BBQ is planned, immediately the husband volunteers to take up the work, and the following things happen:

a)Woman buys food
b)Woman makes salads, prepares side dishes, BBQ sauces, and desert.
c)Woman makes a quick marinade because Man "forgot".
d) Man puts meat on BBQ.
e)Woman gets plates and cutlery from the kitchen.
f) Man talks with friend, woman reminds that meat is already burning.
g)Man says thanks and orders another beer from his wife at the occasion.
h)Man takes meat from grill.
i)Man hands over the meat to the woman, relieves her from the burden of carrying the beer.
j) Woman puts meat, plates, cutlery, napkins, glasses, bread and sauces on the table.
k)Everyone eats.
l)Woman gets more beer for her husband.
m)Woman collects plates and glasses, makes the dish-washing and cleans the grill.
n)Everyone thanks the man for the delicious meal.
o)Man pats his wife, asking her how she liked not having to cook for once.
p)Man doesn't get sex for a week.
q)Man marvels about the mystery of women.

[Kitschum]

Consider yourself lucky you think that's weird

[Felch]

I always save my favorite part for last. If there's beef with broccoli, I eat the veggies first and then the meat. That's not to say I don't like broccoli, because I do. But I like keeping the really good stuff for last.

[KrazyHorse]

You have a wife?

I hope she

a)is not from Quebec
b)did not study Human Sciences (*, term will be referred to in subsequent posts)
c)does not call a distribution Gaussian when there's only a finite number of whatever
d)is really sweet when you're sour, or
e)possesses a good rolling pin and cast-iron pans.

a) I'm from quebec
b) She's smarter than almost everybody here, and is a physicist
c) She's far smarter than Hera
d) and e) None of your business, mother****er

[Japher]

BBQ

When a BBQ is planned, immediately the husband volunteers to take up the work, and the following things happen:

a)Woman buys food
b)Woman makes salads, prepares side dishes, BBQ sauces, and desert.
c)Woman makes a quick marinade because Man "forgot".
d) Man puts meat on BBQ.
e)Woman gets plates and cutlery from the kitchen.
f) Man talks with friend, woman reminds that meat is already burning.
g)Man says thanks and orders another beer from his wife at the occasion.
h)Man takes meat from grill.
i)Man hands over the meat to the woman, relieves her from the burden of carrying the beer.
j) Woman puts meat, plates, cutlery, napkins, glasses, bread and sauces on the table.
k)Everyone eats.
l)Woman gets more beer for her husband.
m)Woman collects plates and glasses, makes the dish-washing and cleans the grill.
n)Everyone thanks the man for the delicious meal.
o)Man pats his wife, asking her how she liked not having to cook for once.
p)Man doesn't get sex for a week.
q)Man marvels about the mystery of women.

We our planning a company picnic and I was recently offended by our stupid secretary when asked to ask my wife what we will be bringing as our side. F you, I cook!

[rah]

BBQ

When a BBQ is planned, immediately the husband volunteers to take up the work, and the following things happen:

a)Woman buys food
b)Woman makes salads, prepares side dishes, BBQ sauces, and desert.
c)Woman makes a quick marinade because Man "forgot".
d) Man puts meat on BBQ.
e)Woman gets plates and cutlery from the kitchen.
f) Man talks with friend, woman reminds that meat is already burning.
g)Man says thanks and orders another beer from his wife at the occasion.
h)Man takes meat from grill.
i)Man hands over the meat to the woman, relieves her from the burden of carrying the beer.
j) Woman puts meat, plates, cutlery, napkins, glasses, bread and sauces on the table.
k)Everyone eats.
l)Woman gets more beer for her husband.
m)Woman collects plates and glasses, makes the dish-washing and cleans the grill.
n)Everyone thanks the man for the delicious meal.
o)Man pats his wife, asking her how she liked not having to cook for once.
p)Man doesn't get sex for a week.
q)Man marvels about the mystery of women.

While that is quite clever and I found it amusing, that's not quite the way it works at my house.

While we normally split cooking duties depending on what the main course will be,
when my wife is planning meals for the week when she's at the store, she'll sometimes buy an entire week of main courses that are much better if done on the grill knowing that I always do the grilled meals.
Whoever does the main course prepares everything else unless a specialty is involved. So if I'm on the grill she just sits in her chair and grins. At least she'll thank me for a delicious meal afterwards.
In my house there is a bit less of the mystery of women.

[DirtyMartini]

I would actually prefer that my wife never cook. I've never met anyone elso who can dirty such an inordinately large number of dishes and utensils. Usually these remain strewn about the kitchen for 12-48 hours before they are cleaned up. The food isn't worth having to work around a kitchen full of **** for two days.

[KrazyHorse]

Usually when one person cooks the other should clean up. Just saying...

[DaShi]

Some of us clean while we cook. Although after we eat, it all goes in the sink.

[rah]

Usually when one person cooks the other should clean up. Just saying...

That's the way we used to do it when we first got married but then I did a dumb thing.
When our daughter was in day care we had agreed that I'd drop her off in the morning and my wife would pick her up. Then I changed jobs and couldn't drop her off, so I agree in exchange for that I would do dishes regardless of who cooked. My daughter is in her senior year in college and I"m still doing the dishes
Even though we share housework she probably does more than 50% so it could be dangerous if I pushed the issue.

[DirtyMartini]

I clean as I cook. By the time dinner is served, 90% of the dishes are clean, stacked neatly in the sink or in the dishwasher.

I used to agree to the one cooks, one cleans up arrangement, but you guys really have no idea the massive mess she makes for even the simplest food. If she toasts a bagel for breakfast, theres an open bag of bagels on the counter, a used knife, bagel crumbs, open jar of jam, open container of fake butter, OJ jug on counter, toaster is pulled out to the middle of the counter, has smeared butter finger prints on it. Plate with 90% eaten bagel and cup with 90% drunk OJ remain on counter. It is truly absurd.

[rah]

My wife claims I'm the messier cook, but she hasn't cleaned the dishes in 15 years, so who are you going to believe She is much messier than I because I too clean while I cook.

[Ben Kenobi]

I love bbqs, but this is how it goes if I'm the one cooking.

a) Make up the menu
b) Go to town and buy food
c) Make salads, prepare side dishes.
d) Make a quick marinade
e) Clean grill before putting the meat on.
f) Put meat on BBQ.
g) Woman gets plates and cutlery from the kitchen.
h) Take meat from grill.
i) Woman puts meat, plates, cutlery, napkins, glasses, bread and sauces on the table.
j) Everyone eats.
k)Woman collects plates and glasses, dish-washing.

[Fve Crathva]

or be happy with the rice and tell your gf you're hungry for some protein and will be back later after blowing a few dudes.

SP

[MikeH]