Funny Pictures Again and Again

[duke o' york]

Originally recorded by Chas and Dave
Snooker loopy nuts are we
Me and him and them and me
We'll show you what we can do
With a load of balls and a snooker cue

Pot the reds then, skrew back
For the yellow green brown blue pink and black
Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Now ol' Milo as we all know's
Got loadsa dappa suits
London bred and he keeps his head
'Though he's got Italian roots
Emotional but he keeps his cool
'Til he reaches the finals
And whether he wins or whether he don't
'I always bite me eyeballs'

Now our friend Den, hours he spent
Down the snooker hall
On the old green baize his mates seem amazed
At skills with a snooker ball
And them long shots, he never ever got
Why? The old mind boggles
But nowadays he pots the lot
'Cos I wear these goggles'

Snooker loopy nuts are we
Me and him and them and me
We'll show you what we can do
With a load of balls and a snooker cue

Pot the reds then, skrew back
For the yellow green brown blue pink and black
Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Now Terry the taff was born in a gaff
In the valleys of the land of song
And as the reds he puts to bed
He likes to sing along
And if I win he says with a grin
It can only help me can't it
I'll celebrate, I'll buy another eight
'Hairbrushes for me barnet'

Now old Willy Thorne his hair's all gone
And his mates all take the rise
His opponent said cover up his head
Cos it's shining in my eyes
When the light shines down on his bare crown
It's a cert he's gonna walk it
It's just not fair giving off that glare
'Perhaps I ought to chalk it'

Snooker loopy nuts are we
Me and him and them and me
We'll show you what we can do
With a load of balls and a snooker cue

Pot the reds then, skrew back
For the yellow green brown blue pink and black
Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Now Steve last year come very near
To winning the snooker crown
But he never got to put it on his ginger nut
Cos the black ball wouldn't go down
His manager of all said 'Sod that ball'
But it helped him make his mind up
Now he don't care who wins this year
'Cos he's got the rest of us signed up'

Snooker loopy nuts are we
Me and him and them and me
We'll show you what we can do
With a load of balls and a snooker cue

Pot the reds then, skrew back
For the yellow green brown blue pink and black
Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Snooker loopy nuts are we
Me and him and them and me
We'll show you what we can do
With a load of balls and a snooker cue

Pot the reds then, skrew back
For the yellow green brown blue pink and black
Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Snooker loopy nuts are we
We're all snooker loopy

Snooker loopy nuts are we.....
We're all snooker loopy

[Grandpa Troll]

I don't think any non-UK native would get that. I've tried (O how I have TRIED) to get USers to play snooker but they won't. Too much maths, they said!

But yes, my "pot brown" and "pot pink" jokes don't get very far with this crowd. :/

Im pretty sure I have cleaned out both, voluntarily on many occassion, but Im a more serious type, I take my time to do my j-o-b when performing these acts of endearment

[duke o' york]

Act of endearment? Try telling that to Ronnie O'Sullivan's opponent as he gets 4 for the brown, 5 for the blue and 6 for the pink en route to a maximum.

[Zkribbler]

Funny Pictures Again and Again

Australia was advertising a job for an "Island Caretaker." It was basically to be a beach bum and paid $105,000/year. Among the responses they received was....

[Thoth]

Is the job still open? :hopefull:

[Zkribbler]

Is the job still open? :hopefull:

[Hides half-completed application behind his back.] Er...no...nope...job's been filled. Move along.

[AngieC]

That's not a picture

[Zkribbler]

Tanuki are a species of raccoon in Japan and in folklore have various magical powers. They also have really really huge furry round cojones carried in giant sacks that are so large sometimes they can carry them over their shoulders.

In other raccoon news:

(CNN) — In the ongoing battle between a pack of particularly ambitious raccoons and the White House groundskeepers, the raccoons appear to be winning.

According to White House spokesman Robert Gibbs, no raccoons have been caught on the White House grounds since the band of intruders were first spotted roaming the premises earlier this month.

The National Parks service set up several traps around the White House lawn earlier this week after determining one large raccoon and several smaller ones were causing trouble around the West Wing and the Executive Mansion.

If and when the raccoons are caught they will be released into the wild, the National Park Service has said.

But the traps, which include peanut butter and apples as bait, have yet to allure any of the pesky mammals.

"No raccoons that I know of have been caught or disbursed into other places in Washington," said Gibbs.

The White House press secretary also said he would be of little use in the hunt: "There are a few that roam in my backyard, so I don't have any particular tips."

[Zkribbler]

It's a moving picture. It's called a video.

[Zkribbler]

Oh damn. I just noticed that AC's "Return of the Revenge..." thread includes the phrase "Funny Pictures." I thought it was a raccoon thread, but it's a funny picture thread. This thread should probably be closed.

Or...renamed by a mod to be a funny video thread.

[Thoth]

Oh damn. I just noticed that AC's "Return of the Revenge..." thread includes the phrase "Funny Pictures." I thought it was a raccoon thread, but it's a funny picture thread. This thread should probably be closed.

Or...renamed by a mod to be a funny video thread.

AC's thread has degenerated into a discussion of snooker. Carry on with the funny pics.



PS: I have dibs on the beach-bum job.....union rules say I have seniority.

[Grandpa Troll]

Act of endearment? Try telling that to Ronnie O'Sullivan's opponent as he gets 4 for the brown, 5 for the blue and 6 for the pink en route to a maximum.

sorry, I was referencing something maybe different

[duke o' york]

Sorry, but union rules dictate that you have to pot an in-off on the red and line up perfectly for the black. Unlucky Thoth.

[Zkribbler]

Aaaghhh! [Zkribb is helpless in the face of union rules ]

[Thoth]

Sorry, but union rules dictate that you have to pot an in-off on the red and line up perfectly for the black. Unlucky Thoth.

Pah! Complicated rules are for management dweebs. Those of us who work for a living just have to hook you behind the nine-ball.



(nine-ball >>>snooker>>>pool)