Strange behavior of new gf ;)

[MattBowron]

Dear DanielXY,

sometimes girls who are treated badly by parents, particularly fathers, makes them develop low self-esteem. Women who have had abusive fathers tend to either have incredibly low self esteem, or tend to date men who treat her similar because unconsciously she is trying again to win love from a similar father-figure. Low self esteem girls may also have trouble with relationships, thinking they're not worth being loved, and thus may push men away. Othertimes they may go the complete reversal and try their hardest to please guys to make up for the lack of love they've received in their life. This is just a point of view based on their past experiences.

Now none of this may apply to your girlfriend, but if it does happen to be the case, and if you want a serious long term relationship, she will eventually have to confront said issues. You'll just need to help her find the strength and confidence within herself by being supportive as in ready to listen and hold her when you're able to do so. Eventually she'll develop enough support to relax, see herself in new light and change her views over time.

And if this isn't the case and she's just a nice girl, then congratulations my man, and i wish the best for the both of you. Pardon if my advice may have gotten you worried, just looking out for both of you, since relationships with people with low self esteem can be quite taxing now and then, as I myself have been in relationships and friendships with girls with low-self esteem.

Yours sincerely

MattBowron

[Arrian]

Bizzarre. I totally missed page 3 of this thread when I went to post. Heh. So she ended up flaking out, huh? Well, it could've been worse. It could've happened much later (doing far more damage).

-Arrian

[chequita guevara]

Can I pick 'em or what?

Anyway, congrats man. The only important thing is that you're doing what makes you happy. Just don't listen to this advice:

"She sounds like an awesome girl who perhaps was treated badly in the past. Treat her like a princess and she will make you the happiest man in the world."

That's what women want you to think will happen. That might even be what women think that they want. What will really happen is the old dictum will be proven true - "Nice guys finish last". I'm not saying be a dick, but I am saying don't pamper her like a princess and expect to live happily ever after.

Everyone has some issues, everyone. If you keep waiting for the person with no problems, you'll be single a long time. The point is to know what kind of issues you're dealing with and whether or not you can deal with them.

[Supr49er]

Congrats Murg you got it right. She doesnt love me indeed... Today she told me her feelings changed etc... lets be friends... wtf? Ah well another one down the drain... next...

Happy new year hu?

I got the feeling someone is gonna get seriously drunk today....

Sorry to hear it. Almost no point trying to figure out what happened.

Enjoy your whisky.

[MikeH]

She sounds like an awesome girl who perhaps was treated badly in the past. Treat her like a princess and she will make you the happiest man in the world.

Good luck!

The best post in the thread.

[FrostyBoy]

So she's available?

[rah]

She probably had been treated bad, so had low self asteem and went out with you and did everything to keep you. You treated her well. (including taking her home for the holidays) and her self asteem has risen and she now figures she can do better. Good riddance.

And be happy that she came to this decision because if you were the one to break if off, she sounds like of those unstable typies that might have turned psycho on you.

Enjoy a good drunk, but remember the happy moments.