Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

I want to start a religion based on beer.

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #46
    maybe you should become a HeBREW

    http://www.shmaltz.com/index1.html

    'Genesis Ale:

    Our First Creation

    Crisp, smooth and perfectly balanced between a west coast style pale and amber ale, with a supple malt sweetness and a pronounced hop flourish.

    Malts: 2-row, Caramel 40L, Dark Crystal, Munich, Wheat

    Hops: Warrior, Northern Brewer, Willamette

    "4 Stars...This lovely ale deserves a wide interdenominational audience." - San Diego Union-Tribune'


    Or

    'Messiah Bold:

    It's the Beer You've Been Waiting For!

    **NEW RECIPE AND A NEW STYLE!**
    A deep, bold nut brown ale beautifully balanced with rich dark malts and a complex hop character converging to reveal a simply enchanting elixir.

    Malts: 2-row, Carapils, Dark Crystal/ Caramel 80L, Dark Chocolate, Victory

    Hops: Warrior, Cascade, Mt. Hood

    "HE'BREW could bring a whole new meaning to the term High Holidays...genuinely delicious brew!" - Jerusalem Report'
    "A person cannot approach the divine by reaching beyond the human. To become human, is what this individual person, has been created for.” Martin Buber

    Comment


    • #47
      I would.
      We must gather a synodus and establish church union with either wine or vodka; we'll make a nice crusade together and liberate our Holy Lands, whatever we capture, that is. 3 crusades against one shall be enough I guess, then we'll come to phase B. We must beware of internal enemies, as well - the pesky liquor drinkers living among us and the beer heretics. We must reveal the horrors of heresy of non-alcoholic beers (forgive The lord, their producents, for we shall not) and, as burning them on stake is not quite possiblle, we must overcome our disgust and drink it until there's not a single drop left!
      "I realise I hold the key to freedom,
      I cannot let my life be ruled by threads" The Web Frogs
      Middle East!

      Comment


      • #48
        Thou shall keep the sabbath holy during football season.
        And all women will observe such sabbaths with vows of silence and making sure that the holy beverage is in plentiful supply.
        It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
        RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

        Comment


        • #49
          Originally posted by Rufus T. Firefly
          Given recent developments in the beverage world, I must insist on this commandment:

          Only Beer is beer, and thou shalt have no other beer than Beer. The ale, the porter, the stout, the lambic -- these for you may be Beer. But verily, Zima is not beer; nor is Bud Extreme beer. And if it tastes more like lemonade, or fruit punch, or wine cooler than beer, then, even if it is called beer, thou shalt not drink of it, for it is not Beer.


          I was thinking of how exactly to phrase it. That's perfect.

          [q=tecumseh]ONE: 'Thou shall have no other suds before Me.[/q]

          One slight change: Thou shalt have no other drink before beer.

          For yay, it is a jealous beer, who must be drunk above all others and more than all others. And we bow our heads in forgiveness and drink more of the wonderous ambrosia.

          And of course, a prayer:

          Our brewmaster, who brewed this beverage, hallowed by thy hops
          Thy tavern come
          Thy will be done
          (drunken warblings till this end)
          “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
          - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

          Comment


          • #50


            Let's all bow before the new Beer-Messiah
            Blah

            Comment


            • #51
              beer
              Why can't you be a non-conformist just like everybody else?

              It's no good (from an evolutionary point of view) to have the physique of Tarzan if you have the sex drive of a philosopher. -- Michael Ruse
              The Nedaverse I can accept, but not the Berzaverse. There can only be so many alternate realities. -- Elok

              Comment


              • #52
                Beer thread!

                I have nothing to add except my avatar: have a beer.
                "Stuie has the right idea" - Japher
                "I trust Stuie and all involved." - SlowwHand
                "Stuie is right...." - Guynemer

                Comment


                • #53
                  what shall be done about the "light" beer heresy that spreads upon the land?
                  If you don't like reality, change it! me
                  "Oh no! I am bested!" Drake
                  "it is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong" Voltaire
                  "Patriotism is a pernecious, psychopathic form of idiocy" George Bernard Shaw

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Originally posted by shawnmmcc
                    The Vat of the Covenant. (SORRY I didn't resize it.)
                    I think we realized that

                    Blah

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      Why not open a brewery?
                      Pope's Pilsner, comes to mind.
                      Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                      "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                      He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        Originally posted by GePap
                        what shall be done about the "light" beer heresy that spreads upon the land?
                        I believe Holy War is the only proper action to take.
                        “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                        - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui


                          I believe Holy War is the only proper action to take.
                          Ditto for malt beverages.
                          Visit First Cultural Industries
                          There are reasons why I believe mankind should live in cities and let nature reclaim all the villages with the exception of a few we keep on display as horrific reminders of rural life.-Starchild
                          Meat eating and the dominance and force projected over animals that is acompanies it is a gateway or parallel to other prejudiced beliefs such as classism, misogyny, and even racism. -General Ludd

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Originally posted by BeBro
                            I don't trust Stoiber. He would fight just for some personal preferred beer. We need someone who would fight for TEH TRUE BEER, including inquisition and beer-crusades.
                            I thought Stoiber was anti-alcoholic? A german friend once told me that he never drinks beer, just poses with it before TV cams, because that's what people expect.

                            Comment


                            • #59
                              Originally posted by rah
                              Thou shall keep the sabbath holy during football season.
                              And all women will observe such sabbaths with vows of silence and making sure that the holy beverage is in plentiful supply.
                              Hey wait a minute thats not fair for those of us women who like the football season. for one I keep it holy with plenty of beer on hand. I demand a rewording if that commandment is to be considered( Or maybe sounds nicer if i make the request instead of the demand )
                              When you find yourself arguing with an idiot, you might want to rethink who the idiot really is.
                              "It can't rain all the time"-Eric Draven
                              Being dyslexic is hard work. I don't even try anymore.

                              Comment


                              • #60
                                i'm in.
                                I wasn't born with enough middle fingers.
                                [Brandon Roderick? You mean Brock's Toadie?][Hanged from Yggdrasil]

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X