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Something To Offend Damn-near Everybody

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  • Something To Offend Damn-near Everybody

    1. What's the Cuban national anthem? ................"Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

    2. Where does an Irish family go on vacation? .................A different bar.

    3. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? ................They named him "Sum Ting Wong."

    4. What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? .........A speech impediment.

    5. What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-staff? ................They're hiring.

    6. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek? ............Because they're not going to work in the future either.

    7. What do you call an Arkansas farmer with a sheep under each arm? .............. A pimp.

    8. Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays? ................Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

    9. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? ................A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.

    10. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? ................Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell
    *BINGO*!

    11. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? ................A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this sh!t..."

    12. My, my, how times have changed. Years ago...When 100 white men chased 1 black man, we called it the Ku Klux Klan. ..................Today they call it the PGA TOUR.

    13. Why is there no Disneyland in China? ................No one's tall enough to go on the good rides




    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
    "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
    He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

  • #2
    Somewhere in Texas

    Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
    "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
    He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

    Comment


    • #3
      Postia ante deletia
      "Spirit merges with matter to sanctify the universe. Matter transcends to return to spirit. The interchangeability of matter and spirit means the starlit magic of the outermost life of our universe becomes the soul-light magic of the innermost life of our self." - Dennis Kucinich, candidate for the U. S. presidency
      "That’s the future of the Democratic Party: providing Republicans with a number of cute (but not that bright) comfort women." - Adam Yoshida, Canada's gift to the world

      Comment


      • #4
        You're just mad because Finn's weren't included.
        Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
        "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
        He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

        Comment


        • #5
          Long time member @ Apolyton
          Civilization player since the dawn of time

          Comment


          • #6
            I am offended that there was nothing to specifically offend me on this list. Exclusionary!
            Tutto nel mondo è burla

            Comment


            • #7
              Brahms sucks!

              Happy now, Boris?

              Comment


              • #8
                I'll be damned if I'm getting you on my case today, Boris.
                I need a break.
                Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by JohnT
                  Brahms sucks!

                  Happy now, Boris?
                  Oh no, you've brought him back again!
                  Attached Files
                  Tutto nel mondo è burla

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Just to piss people off:

                    When are you going to take off that santa hat, Boris?

                    12-17-10 Mohamed Bouazizi NEVER FORGET
                    Stadtluft Macht Frei
                    Killing it is the new killing it
                    Ultima Ratio Regum

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      ONE WEEK MORE!



                      Looks like mid-June now.
                      Tutto nel mondo è burla

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Mid June?

                        Get rid of it know!!!

                        Get rid of it!

                        Die Santa Die.
                        Grrr | Pieter Lootsma | Hamilton, NZ | grrr@orcon.net.nz
                        Waikato University, Hamilton.

                        Comment


                        • #13


                          That PGA joke was hilarious!
                          “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
                          - John 13:34-35 (NRSV)

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                          • #14
                            Nuke gay muslim whales?

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Imran Siddiqui


                              That PGA joke was hilarious!
                              It's sports. I knew you'd like that one.
                              Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.
                              "Hating America is something best left to Mobius. He is an expert Yank hater.
                              He also hates Texans and Australians, he does diversify." ~ Braindead

                              Comment

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