Bisexual?

[Asher]

Originally posted by Boris Godunov
Some people are just not attracted to black people. I can't say why that is, but that is something beyond their control and to judge them for it is foolishness. Small-minded foolishness. Not wanting to date someone who you are not attracted to is, I will wager, accepted as every person's right.

It's foolish to say people who refuse to date someone with a different skin color are being shallow, but it's not foolish to refuse to date someone because they have a different skin color?

Only if the rationale is that bisexuals are somehow bad, unfaithful, evil, etc. That is not my rationale, it is not monkspider's rationale, nor anyone elses that I have seen. You're inability to see anything beyond your own "It must be HATE" shows you're small-minded.

I never once mentioned hate, bigotry, or any type of phobia. Is this some kind of lopsided strawman you're trying to set up?

It's in your subconscious, and you're refusing to accept that.

Spoken like a fanatic. What a wonderful thing to think. Thank god most people are far more rational than you.

It's not rational for me to say I have a right to call people shallow?

That's what love/dating in general is all about, irrational emotions. You might as well hate the guy who doesn't want to date the overweight girl. You're being foolish.

Again, you're so eager to use the word hate when I never use it in my arguments.

And yeah, there is a reason most guys don't like dating overweight girls. They don't find them attractive for the most part, and biologically we have an instinct to mate with the most physically attractive mate possible.

Which is perfectly fine, it's everyone's right. But nobody here has ever said anything of the kind, only that for WHATEVER reason, you have no right to judge them.

You just don't get it, do you?
You're JUDGING people by refusing to date them because of skin tone, or if they're bi. Do you want me to repeat that several times?

No, the only thing that is obvious is that they do not want to date a bisexual, for reasons which they alone need worry about. The rest is...none of your business.

If it's none of my business stop posting it on the message boards. You do realize this is a public forum, not a place for internal dialog?

Well, the comment was quite rude and seemed rather homophobic in nature. Without you giving a massive explanation of why I shouldn't think you're homophobic, I will have to assume you are. After all, you're doing the same thing to me.

Strawman again. I've not used any term of phobia nor hate. Not once.

And you can go ahead and think I'm homophobic, it'll just be one of the many links in your chain of irrationality.

A statement you made seem to indicate that being bisexual was solely based on having slept with someone of each gender. I was pointing out that is bull****. I am 100% gay, but I have slept with a woman in the past. Being gay has nothing to do with who I have slept with, and neither does being bisexual.

No, I obviously didn't mean having sex with a woman makes everyone bi.

If you're asserting that the bisexual partner loses all attraction for females in such a case, I will call you a liar right here and now. I have plenty of bisexual friends (ones who have a lot of experience, too), and they would all laugh their asses off at this assertion.

What the HELL does attraction have anything to do with this?!?!?

They're in a MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIP with YOU. YOU are still attracted to people, THEY are still attracted to people, can you POSSIBLY explain the relevance this has on said peoples' genitalia?

One day, kemosabe, you will learn the difference between a personal attack and statement of general belief/preference. I am not the blind one here.

Of course not, I am. I'm the one dismissing dating people because they also are attracted to women. Oh wait, that's not me is it?

Child. We can consider this discussion closed, as you are incapable of civil discourse.

It was closed long ago when you refused to try logic or even thinking in your responses, basically replying with "I just don't wanna!".

[MrFun]

Asher, as I have pointed out in our private messages, I am reconsidering my choice regarding bisexuals and any monogamous relationship I seek.
Provost --- I hope you're reading this.


But still, let's follow this logic:

1) If you're white, black, or Hispanic, and you prefer to only date someone of your own race, you're a racist.
2) If you're a Christian and you prefer to only marry another Christian of the same denomination, then you're religiously bigoted.
3) If you're Christian, and you prefer to not marry any Jew, then you're anti-semitic.
4) And lastly, if you're heterosexual or homosexual, and prefer not to have a monogamous union with a bisexual, then you hate bisexuals.


I'm sorry, while I'm reconsidering my stance on this issue, the above list just does not make sense to me if you can relate to these different people on an equal basis, in all other aspects, except when it comes with whom you want to marry or share your life with.

If I hated bisexuals, I would be actively speaking out against all heterosexuals and homosexuals who want a relationship with bisexuals.
But I am not doing that, since I have never hated bisexuals. If a hetero or a homo wants to have a serious relationship with a bisexual, that is great for them -- it really is.

But when it comes to my own personal choice, unless I change this after reconsidering, I prefer a gay man over a bisexual man, because I can more completely relate with a gay man than I could with a bisexual man.
Does this mean that I protest against other heteros and homos who have relationships with bisexuals?? NO, NO, NO!!

[Provost Harrison]

I do urge you to consider, because you just seem to have no founding for your prejudice. And it is a prejudice. After all, if I was never vocal about it, yet still hated all homosexuals and wouldn't associate with them, would that still make me prejudiced?

[MrFun]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
I do urge you to consider, because you just seem to have no founding for your prejudice. And it is a prejudice. After all, if I was never vocal about it, yet still hated all homosexuals and wouldn't associate with them, would that still make me prejudiced?

But I DO associate with bisexuals on friendly terms in all other aspects.

And I would hate to lose your respect because of this.



Maybe even though I prefer a gay man over a bisexual man for a monogamous relationship, that does not mean that someday, I might meet a bisexual man who causes me to change my views.

[SpencerH]

Originally posted by MrFun

Maybe even though I prefer a gay man over a bisexual man for a monogamous relationship, that does not mean that someday, I might meet a bisexual man who causes me to change my views.

I would say that is a fundamental change from what you said previously.

[Zoid]

Originally posted by MrFun

And why has everyone ignored my racial relationship analogy??

Does mono-racial relationships indicate racism?? If not, then that means gays who do not prefer bisexuals for relationships are bi-phobic, right??

I would disagree, with both instances.

I´d say that YES, not having a relationship with a person cause he/she´s black/white/yellow/whatever IS racist. Maybe sub-conscious but still racist.

The same applies to homo/bi relationships IMO. I´m with Asher and PH on this one.

[Provost Harrison]

Personally I refuse to speculate on who would be the ideal woman for me, I don't know, it is so variable, depending on personality and how their looks come together anyway. What if you met a bisexual you really liked? If you don't say these things, you don't put your head on the block MrFun

[MrFun]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
Personally I refuse to speculate on who would be the ideal woman for me, I don't know, it is so variable, depending on personality and how their looks come together anyway. What if you met a bisexual you really liked? If you don't say these things, you don't put your head on the block MrFun

Ok, so I can at least hold this then -- while I prefer a gay man for a monogamous relationship, there is a possibility that someday, I might meet a bisexual man who would capture my heart.

[Provost Harrison]

Well it's not ideal. The fact of the matter is that you should meet the right man one day

And don't worry, I'm being called a racist bigot in another thread by paiktis22

[SpencerH]

IMO, this is an important bit too.

I prefer a gay man over a bisexual man, because I can more completely relate with a gay man than I could with a bisexual man

[MrFun]

Why do I get this eerie feeling that I have inadverdently subjected myself to psychological probing by Spencer and Provost??

[Zoid]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison

And don't worry, I'm being called a racist bigot in another thread by paiktis22

Why? Which thread?

[Provost Harrison]

The 'we may not have won Eurovision...' thread...

[Ecthy]

paiktis is just trolling the rest of the world there, again, nothing serious.

[Jarouik]

Originally posted by MrFun
Ok, so I can at least hold this then -- while I prefer a gay man for a monogamous relationship, there is a possibility that someday, I might meet a bisexual man who would capture my heart.

I agree. Earlier not having met anyone who considers themselves bisexual, I might have had misgivings about dating one in the past.

However, my current (and only) boyfriend thinks he is somewhat bisexual, since he had a girlfriend a few years ago and really was emotionally attached to her. During the past year or so he has made it rather clear he loves me, so I could no longer imagine liking him any less just because he loved (or thought he loved) a girl in his teens.

Whether he should be considered 'truly' bisexual or if he was only dating a girl because of social pressure to do so doesn't really matter - he liked her, but it would seem that I am the one he wants to spend his life with. I fail to see how his earlier relationship with a girl should affect the way I feel about him.