Little Known Facts About Texas

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by SlowwHand
Yes, we certainly do. 180 Texans kicked the **** out of a few thousand Mexicans for a couple of weeks.
Then, Goliad.
Finally, San Jacinto.

I've seen the official timeline for the Battle of the Alamo. It took the Mexicans a few weeks to gather together forces that had become scattered on the roads over the one thousand mile + march from Mexico City to Texas. They would have needed to do this before marching further into Texas anyway. Once the Mexicans mounted an attack it only took a matter of a few hours to overrun the Alamo.

San Jacinto was a masterpiece though.

[Lung]

Re: Little Known Facts About Texas

Originally posted by Tiamat
Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

Armadillos. What funny creatures they are

Roadrunners don't say "Beep Beep."

I suppose yer gonna tell me coyotes don't carry knives and forks, too?

Armadillos love to dig holes under all bedding plants.

Armadillos

Nothing will kill a mesquite tree.

Sounds like Queensland. Nothing will kill a cane toad

Texas has 6 seasons:


Spring - Feb 16 to April 15;
Summer - April 16 to July 15 (temp 90 to 98 degrees);
Super Summer - July 16 to Sept 10 (temp 100 to 115 degrees);
Summer - Sept. 11 to Oct 1 (temp 90 to 98 degrees);
Fall - Oct 2 to Dec 1;
Winter - Dec. 2 to Feb 15

Hey! That sounds just like Ivanhoe! In my little outback home town, we had six seasons too!

Spring - Sep 16 to Sep 29
Summer - Sep 30 to Dec 15
Hell - Dec 16 to Mar 1
Summer Mar 2 to Apr 15
Autumn - Apr 16 to Apr 29
Winter - Apr 30 to Sep 15

Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic and they multiply even faster than rabbits.

So you're the culprits!!

Coldbeer is one word.

Damned tautologists!!!

When a buzzard sits on the fence and stares at you, it's time to
go to the doctor.

Pretty crappy morning songbird, if you ask me!

Opossum is pronounced "possum" and resembles a big hairless rat.

They don't mate in your ceiling, do they?

[SlowwHand]

Y'all are nothing but Texan wannabes.

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by SlowwHand
Y'all are nothing but Texan wannabes.

Don't give me that. Why would I wannabe a Texan. I'm originally a Tennesseean, and we Tennesseans know all we need to know about you Texans. Most of the early (non-Hispanic) Texans came from Tennessee. Texas was sorta like our version of Australia, a place to stash the riffraff. Contrary to the song the "Yellow Rose of Texas" never beat the "Belles of Tennessee". Go ahead, try and prove it, find a source. So why would I wannabe a Texan?

[Boris Godunov]

IOWA = I Owe the World an Apology

[Boris Godunov]

Originally posted by Dr Strangelove


Don't give me that. Why would I wannabe a Texan. I'm originally a Tennesseean, and we Tennesseans know all we need to know about you Texans. Most of the early (non-Hispanic) Texans came from Tennessee. Texas was sorta like our version of Australia, a place to stash the riffraff. Contrary to the song the "Yellow Rose of Texas" never beat the "Belles of Tennessee". Go ahead, try and prove it, find a source. So why would I wannabe a Texan?

Well, whaddaya know. I was born in Murfreesburo.

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by Boris Godunov


Well, whaddaya know. I was born in Murfreesburo.

I was born in Knoxville, but my Dad was from Paris and my Mom was from Memphis.

[Boris Godunov]

I lived in Memphis for 8 years. Moved away shortly before they built the Pyramid.

[David Floyd]

Tennessee - The Volunteer State.

Obviously they don't breed 'em smart in THAT state

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by Boris Godunov
I lived in Memphis for 8 years. Moved away shortly before they built the Pyramid.

What Pyramid?

[Dr Strangelove]

Originally posted by David Floyd
Tennessee - The Volunteer State.

Obviously they don't breed 'em smart in THAT state

Oh Yeah!? Well..... uhhh.......George W. Bush is the best that TEXAS has to offer!!!!! Take that!!!!

[David Floyd]

oh hyeafff? wellllllll i like beert goddfgamit!

[Sarxis]

Fact:

Texas is the size of the meteor Dottie in the movie Armaggedon.

[Mr. President]

New York, New York, it's a hell of a town. Texas, Texas, it's a Hell State.

[Lonestar]

Originally posted by Mr. President
New York, New York, it's a hell of a town. Texas, Texas, it's a Hell State.

Texas: Heaven for men and Dogs, Hell for Wimmim and Children.