Interfering in Other Peoples' Sex Lives

[Tingkai]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
It is amazing how mature some 14 year olds are. You have to judge each situation on it's merits.

But if we believe that a law is necessary to protect the young from older sexual predators then that law cannot be based on individual situations. It must be based on the general situation.

In general, the vast majority of 14-year-olds are not mature. They lack the ability to think about certain concepts.

[Sava]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
Come on sava, you've slurred this man enough times. He has a difference of opinions with you but at least you can respect his opinions rather than implying he is a sexual deviant or immoral. It is all about the choice of the individual. It is amazing how mature some 14 year olds are. You have to judge each situation on it's merits.

Unfortunately the overwhelming majority of 14 year olds aren't mature enough. It's a numbers game Provost. You can't set up a maturity test for people to see if they are ready for the responsibilities associated with a sexual relationship. Somewhere the law has to draw a line. I know the world isn't black and white, but this is the best way of doing things at this time. It is like capitalism. It has its flaws, but its the best system around.

I'm not trying to slur him, I'm trying to change his views. Would you vote a 14 year old to be the leader of a country? Of course not.... and why? Because he or she would not have enough experience and isn't ready for that kind of responsibility.

There is a reason many of the people opposed to pre-18 sex are adults and older people. They know more and have had more experience in life. I'm only 21, yet I am much more experienced then I was at 20.

I still can't believe that there are people arguing against me. It seems inconceivable that anyone would think that its okay for a 14 year old CHILD to have sex. Not just with other 14 year olds, but an older man. I can see that humanity has a long way to go. I think the people on Apolyton are, in general, smarter than the majority of the world. Yet there are still some that can't even understand why this issue is so important.

I'm done with this thread. Go on and have sex with 14 year olds Tom. Just don't come to my neighborhood.

[Provost Harrison]

Ooooh, don't draw me into the 'capitalism is the best system' debate, that's thin ice for you there

[Sava]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
Ooooh, don't draw me into the 'capitalism is the best system' debate, that's thin ice for you there

It's not a debate. It's fact. The cold war was like evolution. The fittest survived. Capitalism IS the best system that exists. Regardless of what ideoligical systems would be better in theory, I'm talking about what is in practice in the real world.

[Provost Harrison]

That's why this system can't cater for the most basic needs of the population of this planet. But that is a different argument. Let's stick to the paedophilia for this one

[Zevico]

Wow. 14 years old and having sex. Nothing going that far in my school (although apparently about one third of my year takes marijuana).

[Tom201]

Would you vote a 14 year old to be the leader of a country? Of course not.... and why? Because he or she would not have enough experience and isn't ready for that kind of responsibility.

Would you vote for a 18 year old. Or rather for someone 30+? If you pick the second - why allow sex with 18 and dont draw the line by 30? The older ones have more experience, thus can make better decisions to have sex or not....

Go on and have sex with 14 year olds Tom.

Actually the youngest girl I had sex with was 16 with me as the younger part (13). Despite that I dont get any nightmares or whatever

Just don't come to my neighborhood.

And if someone with a relationship with a younger girl comes to your neighborhood, what you gonna do? Beat him up? If thats the way you try to enforce you personal Morals, I feel sorry for you.

[Sava]

Originally posted by Tom201
And if someone with a relationship with a younger girl comes to your neighborhood, what you gonna do? Beat him up? If thats the way you try to enforce you personal Morals, I feel sorry for you.

No I'd call the cops and that sicko would get locked up. Don't feel sorry for me, I don't have sex with kids.

[Bugs ****ing Bunny]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
It is all about the choice of the individual. It is amazing how mature some 14 year olds are. You have to judge each situation on it's merits.

The problem is that we don't have boards of trained counsellors, psychologists, social workers and judges available to reach a decision on every couple wishing to have sex to determine if they're ready for it. I think that might prove unworkable, don't you?

These laws aren't enacted to repress to downtrodden youth or uphold Victorian values. They're enacted to protect children from exploitative older people. As such, a cut-off point is required. Whether it's a flat age cut-off, or a sliding scale is a moot point, but it's still a cut-off point.

[Gibsie]

Whew, interesting thread to read during my lunch hour

Anyway, just to clear some stuff up...

And why is that? Some religios believe?

No, not at all. There's just something inside me that says 14 year old girls having sex isn't right. But, it is somewhat irrational, as I think I said; the reason I don't think 14 year-olds should have sex is because they're not as mature, ready or able to deal with the consequences of sex as older people. HOWEVER, not every 14 year-old is like this.

As the guy commented to me, he didn't know her age when he started dating her, and although I did, I do think she seems well above herage, physically and mentally. But not so muchas to excuse a sexual relationship.

About the guy, he's not an increidble loser or a paedophile, as far as I know. I was quite taken aback at his words, because they didn't seem like him. I never thought that he would actually be having sex with a 14 year-old, it doesn't seem like him. He seems quite confused, as as well as saying that he prefers "getting in there and sorting things out himself" over BJ's from the girl, he said he wouldn't have hot monkey sex with a girl younger than 16 years. But then he added that if he got along well enough with her - and they claim to be in love with each other - then he'd go for it.

But does this call for interference? I doubt I could do anything without alienating everyone, him, her, our friends, anyway...

[Tom201]

Do you mean with "consequences of sex" pregnancy or something else?

[devilmunchkin]

here's a new quandry:
teenage pregnancy.

if the girl is living at her parent's house and get's pregnant, should she move out? to what extent to her parents have repsonsibility for her child? and what if her parents have other children living in the home? isn't that unfair to do to them just because some girl can't take her birth control normally? SHould she be made to give it up for adoption? abortion?

specific situation: the girl hasn't graduated from high school; in fact, she's dropped out. her abusive boyfriend that she refuses to break up with also is a drop out and never works..no job. he mooches of her, who in turn steals from her dad...who just takes it despite the fact that he has 6 other children! what about them? They're pro-life, and after moving out for awhile, the girl returns home and announces to the household that she's pregnant, and takes on the front that everyone will just have to deal with it. Her father is angry, but he never puts his foot down with her. THis girl will be 18 in july. Does anyone have the right to step in? If so, in what way.

[Shi Huangdi]

Sick.

A 14 year old is not mature enough to make decisions for herself, and it is too young to be sexually active.

Gibsie, I reccomend you threaten to call the police on this guy to stop this exploitaiton.

[nationalist]

Originally posted by Gibsie
And if your 21 year-old boyfriend pushes to have sex with you, what 14 year-old girl will say no? Hopefully more than my low expectations assume...

Your friend should go to jail. What the **** is a 21 year old doiing screwing a 14 year old? Tell him to get a girl his own age and stop screwing with a 14 year old. She may think that she's a grown up, but I'm sure that her parents and the cops would beg to differ.

[Tingkai]

Originally posted by Gibsie
But does this call for interference? I doubt I could do anything without alienating everyone, him, her, our friends, anyway...

The real question is what is the right thing to do?

I think you need to tell him:

a) what he is doing is illegal and could get him thrown in jail (assuming this is true)
b) What he is doing is morally wrong (assuming you believe that)

If you don't tell him what you think then you are passively condoning it.

From my perspective, if you stand by and do nothing while a friend does something that you believe is wrong then you are a partner in the crime.