Who Pays On A Date...

[Elok]

Ah, I don't think you guys quite understand the nature of my problem. It's not a matter of bravery, it's that I quite simply feel no bond with most human beings. When I talk to most people all I do is transmit information in a crude, clumsy way; there's no practical difference to me between talking to most girls in person and talking to them online, probably due to one or another of my aspie social deficits. It's not to say that I don't find human company enjoyable, it's just that it isn't interesting to me in the same way it is to most. To put it another way, I have a sneaking suspicion that sex with most girls would be little different from cybersex. Possibly even less interesting in some ways, due to my unusual degree of sensory control.
Note that that's with MOST people. With family there's some actual communication going on. And it isn't just that I've had time to know them; I have met others, outside of family, who had a certain spark about them that gave me a better understanding of how they felt in an instant than I get with most people I know for years. Intelligence is one component, yes, but there's also some attribute of personality and thought process or something. Idunno. That's what I mean by a close match though. I think it's an autistic thing, maybe Odin knows what I'm talking about. Or maybe I'm just odd.
And Provost, believe it or not, it's true. I am Master of my Domain...

[Japher]

Elok: Try domination/S&M; definitly wouldn't be any communication problems.

Yes, finding someone who is intelligent or has a personality that you click with is hard to find. Yet, most girls never really open up until the 4th-5th date. You should give 'em time...

Not that we're trying to push you out there.... well, actually we are. Get off your butt and interact with real people!

[/japher bot sign-off]
;0

[Provost Harrison]

I don't believe in that bull****. Fair enough if you are celibate, it is something I am learning to live with too so my empathy goes out to you. But don't deny yourself one method of relieving that tension...and don't deny you get it.

[Bereta_Eder]

Originally posted by obiwan18
Eh, chivalry only works if you make the first move. Otherwise, it's extortion.

Well we did make the first move. It was a double date, my friend knew them from his photography classes or something. I remember picking them up from their houses, as they walked towards the car, they were dazzling! They had the character to go along with that I suppose.

I would say that if everyone's jealous of them, let the jealous fellows buy the drink.

Just a matter of putting them back in line I think, not relinquish them

That happened quite a long time ago, nice memories.

[Elok]

Originally posted by Provost Harrison
I don't believe in that bull****. Fair enough if you are celibate, it is something I am learning to live with too so my empathy goes out to you. But don't deny yourself one method of relieving that tension...and don't deny you get it.

Eh. Got it at first. It went away. No real problem really. I feel fine; in fact, aside from the lack-of-soulmate thing I'm perfectly content with my life. In my experience, contentment is true happiness. Giddy joy comes and goes, and if you get a kick out of it while it's there, good for you, but I prefer the continuous peace that comes from a total lack of worries. I gave up on....that because I can have more peace without it than with it.
And I repeat, with the most affectionate of exasperations: I am in an unusual situation due mostly to my own nature. I live with an invisible wall between me and humanity, and the people who can walk through that wall are few and far between. I'll actually let out a little secret if it'll get you guys to stop raining pity on me: I may have met such a girl. She's currently living too far away to really get in touch with, but I'll see her again some day, see if the feeling is true. If it is I doubt she could be happy with anyone else, and I'm young, so I have nothing to lose but a little of my time.

[Imran Siddiqui]

Women are like wars. Men keep preparing themselves for the last one they were involved with.

[Soul Survivor]

I really need to stop posting on this site..... its like a disease

[Dis]

while in theory I support this original post completely.

but I do like to get laid sometimes.

But what I do is not spend more than $40 on a date with a woman. If you spend lavish amounts of money on a woman, she will see you as a chump and a loser.

[Kaak]

i don't know. my dad raised me to be a "gentleman" and i always try to pay for everything. since i'm spending his money, it works out okay. I did however have a girl pay for my lunch today. We went to a restraunt, and when i put my card on top of the bill, she picked it up and stuck it in her back pocket (and yes, i did go mining for it later). It was nice for a change, but it made me feel uncomfortable. i'd rather pay...

[Ming]

Originally posted by Dissident
If you spend lavish amounts of money on a woman, she will see you as a chump and a loser.

[Dis]

Originally posted by Japher


I'll let you in on something Oerdin; Women don't like "gentlemen", they like the bad boys Then when you've hooked them, you do something like that and the praise you get is 10 times more than what you are getting now...

this gives me an idea. Instead of opening doors for women, I will intentionally slam doors in their face. This plan will surely get me some action.

[Dis]

Originally posted by Elok
Ah, I don't think you guys quite understand the nature of my problem. It's not a matter of bravery, it's that I quite simply feel no bond with most human beings. When I talk to most people all I do is transmit information in a crude, clumsy way; there's no practical difference to me between talking to most girls in person and talking to them online, probably due to one or another of my aspie social deficits. It's not to say that I don't find human company enjoyable, it's just that it isn't interesting to me in the same way it is to most. To put it another way, I have a sneaking suspicion that sex with most girls would be little different from cybersex. Possibly even less interesting in some ways, due to my unusual degree of sensory control.
Note that that's with MOST people. With family there's some actual communication going on. And it isn't just that I've had time to know them; I have met others, outside of family, who had a certain spark about them that gave me a better understanding of how they felt in an instant than I get with most people I know for years. Intelligence is one component, yes, but there's also some attribute of personality and thought process or something. Idunno. That's what I mean by a close match though. I think it's an autistic thing, maybe Odin knows what I'm talking about. Or maybe I'm just odd.
And Provost, believe it or not, it's true. I am Master of my Domain...

I suggest alcohol or Paxil. One or the other will work

also new research says the more orgasm a man has, the less chance of prostate problems later in life. Also it reduces the risk of impotance the more you use your penis. I can't rely on nocturnal emissions and morning wood myself. I tend to take a proactive approach to maintaining my good sexual health.

[geeslaka]

I agree with Elok on this one. Celibacy and contentment is much less stressful.

[Ben Kenobi]

For a time, I'd agree, though not forever.

I'm looking forward to when I get married.

[Dis]

Although I can relate to Elok in many ways. I'm in a transition point right now. I have stopped pursueing women. I've grown almost indifferent to dating. I've had several girlfriends in my lifetime- I even had 2 women interested me at the same time (though I didn't date them at the same time, I'm not that slick). But I never get very far on my dates, and I don't get laid that often on my dates.

My main problem is social anxiety. The only times I've even gotten women to go out with me is when I'm drinking. I tend to use alcohol as self medication because I don't want to use Paxil or Zoloft (though I'm thinking about it). But I have to be careful or I'll develop a nasty addiction. Because of this I don't drink very often. And I haven't been going after women in a long time.

You could say I have given up. But I don't think so. I am still interested in dating. But I'm not interested in casual dating anymore. I cannot relate to common people. But I do think I can find a woman who understands me, and whom I can relate to. Someone who is a little bit looney (in a non-violent way of course) like me. I realize I will never be able to "bond" with the average woman. And I have dated enough in my lifetime, to determine if I've met that woman I can relate to, or just another average woman who I will never get anywhere with.

I still hang out at bars sometimes. But I'm not really interested in those women.

What I'm looking for is a place to meet smart women. Is there such a place? College maybe. But college has hoards of stupid women more interested in stupid stuff. Are there any clubs to meet smart women?

I think someone should open up a bar just for smart people. It would probably fail though. But it's a thought.