how do you do it?

[Q Classic]

every so often, i'll see one of the threads here on 'poly ot about how one's life has suddenly taken a turn for the worse, or of a similar nature.

how do you do it? how do you summon up enough courage or ...something else, i don't know what, that isn't courage... to post here to friendly strangers the troubles that are occuring in your life? on the internet, where it's open for the whole world to see...

don't get me wrong, i find all you guys here on 'poly as good menschen, but ...

[Thorn]

For me, I have no shame... it is almost an alien concept to me....

[Spiffor]

I've never done it, but I suppose this place is excellent to talk about things you'd better not talk about to people you know IRL. Here, you have people who know one aspect of your personality, and who knows this aspect of you well enough to have developed opinions about you. Just like acquaintances.

But unlike acquaintances, whatever the thing you have done, Polytubbies will hardly act against you. You won't notice it if people ignore you, and people who choose to talk with you generally are helpful. Besides, if a poster is acting like an ass in these moments (you don't need that since you are supposed to be fragile in those moments), you can always ignore him.

This is the best place not to be too ashamed of your bad deeds, and to be able to discuss about them, to open up about them.

[Ming]

Originally posted by Thorn
For me, I have no shame... it is almost an alien concept to me....

Isn't that the truth... that's why I end up deleting your almost daily "I want to kill everybody thread"

[Q Classic]

yes, i realize the anonymity is a good thing... even so, i don't understand why others seem not to have the same reservations i do about releasing such sensitive information at all to a non-locked source.

[Flare]

~Shrugs~ Hell, I tell all my friends about my soap-opera life anyway, so why not here? The people here are generally nice people & seem to care. ~WEG~ Besides, misery LOVES company. ~Shrugs~ Also, maybe someone would have ideas that help. OTOH, ranting about how bad your life is helps make that person feel a little bit better.

[Cruddy]

Originally posted by Q Cubed
yes, i realize the anonymity is a good thing... even so, i don't understand why others seem not to have the same reservations i do about releasing such sensitive information at all to a non-locked source.

Well, personal choice. Some people find it easy to open up on the keyboard and some don't.

I can't really see much harm in it, so long as you are prepared for some random answers.

Complete strangers have no preconceptions about who you are, so they can often offer a less biased view.

[DaShi]

It attracts attentionto themselves. Plus, they want the sympathy.

[VetLegion]

QCubed, I agree with you. I would also feel very uncomfortable to discuss intimate matters here, although I am generally extrovert. It is a culture thing perhaps.

I also avoid the threads here where other posters talk about their intimate stuff, because reading that also makes me feel like a voyeaur (sp?) spying

Guilty of skimming a couple of such threads by Pekka though, but I only post if it is not a dramatic issue involved.

[Ben Kenobi]

OTOH, ranting about how bad your life is helps make that person feel a little bit better.

Exactly the point, for many, why they post personal details.

[Q Classic]

i suppose the other issue i have is that i've noticed while anonymity helps the poster, and does bring lots of good suggestions, that same anonymity helps detractors who are intent on making things worse...

[Dis]

one word: anonymity

[Ecthy]

Q Cubed, first of all, what made you call us Menschen?

secondly, anonymity is the key, I was able t otalk about almost everything straightaway from the point when I registered... however, as you build up an identity, things like dignity (that should be there from the start though) and shame and either way certain limits evolve.

for example, I couldn't tell anyone what I've been up to while I was away

[Q Classic]

i called you guys menschen because i like to imagine you're all separate individuals, and because most of you seem like good people.

as for dignity and shame, i suppose that's can be a factor. even if one does post from the beginning and can say anything at all, those threads are where one is baring one's private self to the public with no guarantee of protection or confidentiality. that's what eludes me, the reasoning that allows such things.

[PLATO]

Poly is the class of the internet. If you can't share it here, you wouldn't want to anywhere else on the internet that I have been. I agree with Q Cubed...Most everybody here seems like really decent people and a fantastic variety in points of view as well.