Well, it took me 21 years - but I've finally done it!

[MichaeltheGreat]

Pretty pathetic, ain't it?

[SuperSneak]

Well, I can't say that I haven't been close to being caught for bad stuff, but generally, I managed to avoid such blatantly and patently obvious foolishness--my overwhelming desire not to be punked in front of God, family and Law Enforcement caused me to avoid geeked out situations like that.

But I'm sorry, the dude sounds like he was one bong hit away from putting an arrow through somebody's head or something much more destructive...hope it's a wake up call.

A) Pick a better place to do a deal or smoke dope or put Ectasy suppositories up your butt or whatever.

B) Don't leave your car running.

C) Once you actually return to your car, get in and drive away, in the opposite direction of the police force, just for starters.

D) Don't ask permission to go potty when you gots a baggy in your pants. Eat it.

E) Uh...quit spending your parent's money on drugs.

F) Take a break, bro. It's a sign..a big, flashing red neon sign.

[SuperSneak]

But don't get all religious and weird, like some people around here.
Actually, "religious" and "weird" describes just about everyone here, one way or another.

You'd better stop coming to Apolyton.

[The Mad Monk]

Originally posted by Oerdin
So has anyone translated the Zylkaese and found out what happened?

I believe the following passages are key:

Basically my parents had taken me off the insurance for being bad as of late...

...Now things get worse, as they're checking my id etc...

...my insurance stands to go unrealistic...

The 'criminal record' appears to be driving without insurance.

[Rufus T. Firefly]

The point's already been made, but bears repeating:

If you're going to meet a "friend" to purchase "semi-legal substances," do NOT meet them on the grounds of an organization that HIRES FRICKING GUARDS!!!

You shouldn't be imprisoned for the substances, you shouldn't be grounded for taking the van, but you should be b!tch-slapped into next year for being so spectacularly stupid.

[Rogan Josh]

I still don't understand what the charges are. If they didn't find the 'package', it can't be for that, and if his parents 'dropped the charges' it can't be for taking their van. Did they get him for driving without insurance? If so, why would his insurance go up (it has nothing to do with them)? Or was it for parking on the College parking lot without permission (I hear they give you 10 to life in the US for that)?

[Cruddy]

Oh, big deal Zylka. A lot of Brit kids get arrested before they even turn 13. Especially for auto crime. Juvenile records get scrubbed at adulthood, so we usually make our mistakes before it really matters.

If it was me I'd plead guilty (no insurance, no excuse) and get on with my life.

[CerberusIV]

Perhaps you should go on the run, take a new identity, abandon any contact with your old life (including posting at 'poly) and resurface in 20 years and write a book about your experiences.

[Main_Brain]

Actually, "religious" and "weird" describes just about everyone here, one way or another.

Damn im not religious..
does this conclude im Weird?
I need a Bible

[Ecthy]

insane in the main brain, insane in the brain.

[Skanky Burns]

So what exactly did he get in trouble for?

[chequita guevara]

Originally posted by Cruddy
Oh, big deal Zylka. A lot of Brit kids get arrested before they even turn 13.

The little ****'s 21, not a jouvie. No record scrubbing for Zykla.

As for everyone who thinks I'm being harsh, Zylka's a big, hairy, ******* with dingleberries clinging to it, so yes, I'm damn amused by his getting in trouble. It gives my some hope that there really is justice in the world.

[LTEC!]

Originally posted by SuperSneak
That sounds like a pretty stupid event, compounded by some very stupid behavior.
But thanks for the mental image of you running around like a little boy with his pants on fire, crying about ****ting yourself and hopping in and out of some gypsy van you have not insured and shouldn't be driving.
And for ****'s sake, you're 21 and you're "in trouble" for "sneaking out" the night I assume you were "grounded"?
Let me guess, you're either an only child or the baby of the family?
Grow up, move out, get a job and quit making drug deals in the parking lots of institutions, where security is bored and pervasive.
Dumbass! Dumbass! Dumbass!

My thoughts exactly.

[LTEC!]

Re: Well, it took me 21 years - but I've finally done it!

Originally posted by Zylka
Arrested for the first time! Basically my parents had taken me off the insurance for being bad as of late,

1)Driving without insurance.

yet I took the van out for a little business late last night, after they had fallen asleep. At the parking lot of a college, myself and an upstanding young man parked and I hopped out of the van and into his, leaving the engine running.

2)Drug Dealing

The second I got in, campus security pulls up and the driver jets. I protest, and after a loop he drops me off at a nearby road and I hastily return. Upon my arrival, the guards ask me why I left so suddenly and I tell them that we were afraid that gangsters were coming to get us.

3)Not cooperating with authorities investigation.

~PANIC ENSUES~
I eventually ask the guards if I'm legally allowed to leave, and they hesitate, but I eventually recieve a "yes"
"So you're sure you want to leave before the police get here?"
"Is it my legal right?"
"Well... umm I think so, maybe"
"Alright, see you!"

4) Attempting to flee from the scene

I hop in the van, alas too soon. It seems the rule is that I can leave, but the van stays put, so I stay to try to avoid a hefty impounding fee. Now things get worse, as they're checking my id etc. - they notice the ignition casing has been broken off, as I was trying to start her up with a screwdriver (it had been stolen not too long ago and abandoned).

5) Attempting to remove an impoundable and apparent stolen vehicle.

Oh, wait! Having a borderline legal package in my pocket, I quickly ask if there's a bathroom still open on campus I can use.

6) Drug possesion with intent to sell

"What, do you have to piss?"
"Errr... little bit o' both, I have chronic diahrrea..."
"Ok, go ahead"
I enter the school and ask the guard where the washroom is. As he watches me like a hawk, he replies "I'd rather you just stay here, please."
"Oh, because the 2 guards outside told me they'd rather my taking a **** in the toilet, sir."
"No."
~RUN AWAY~

7) Attempting to flee the scene

I exit the front doors, and up strolls a cruiser. The package is thrown under a nearby tree right before they notice me and flash their lights.

8) Attempting to dispose of evidence

Enter the back of the cruiser, doors are locked... and I hit on the attractive driver before she tells me she's irritated with it and can make my time a lot worse if she so pleases.

9) Being uncooperative with authorities.

Sooo my parents are phoned, they decide not to press charges... I am given a court date to attend, and released. The package is scooped up before a hasty retreat, and I head for the hills in shame.
At home, the folks give me sh*t (surprise). Good Lord am I ashamed, my insurance stands to go unrealistic, and I'm actually going to have a fricking criminal record. I guess I deserve it
So, is there some sort of technicality I can indignantly ride out to freedom, or do I plead guilty? (probation will be the result)

No ****ing way. I am guessing the judge will not have mercy on your soul.

[chequita guevara]

LTEC!