Tweet
Well, it took me 21 years - but I've finally done it!
Arrested for the first time! Basically my parents had taken me off the insurance for being bad as of late, yet I took the van out for a little business late last night, after they had fallen asleep. At the parking lot of a college, myself and an upstanding young man parked and I hopped out of the van and into his, leaving the engine running. The second I got in, campus security pulls up and the driver jets. I protest, and after a loop he drops me off at a nearby road and I hastily return. Upon my arrival, the guards ask me why I left so suddenly and I tell them that we were afraid that gangsters were coming to get us.
~PANIC ENSUES~
I eventually ask the guards if I'm legally allowed to leave, and they hesitate, but I eventually recieve a "yes"
"So you're sure you want to leave before the police get here?"
"Is it my legal right?"
"Well... umm I think so, maybe"
"Alright, see you!"
I hop in the van, alas too soon. It seems the rule is that I can leave, but the van stays put, so I stay to try to avoid a hefty impounding fee. Now things get worse, as they're checking my id etc. - they notice the ignition casing has been broken off, as I was trying to start her up with a screwdriver (it had been stolen not too long ago and abandoned).
Oh, wait! Having a borderline legal package in my pocket, I quickly ask if there's a bathroom still open on campus I can use.
"What, do you have to piss?"
"Errr... little bit o' both, I have chronic diahrrea..."
"Ok, go ahead"
I enter the school and ask the guard where the washroom is. As he watches me like a hawk, he replies "I'd rather you just stay here, please."
"Oh, because the 2 guards outside told me they'd rather my taking a **** in the toilet, sir."
"No."
~RUN AWAY~
I exit the front doors, and up strolls a cruiser. The package is thrown under a nearby tree right before they notice me and flash their lights. Enter the back of the cruiser, doors are locked... and I hit on the attractive driver before she tells me she's irritated with it and can make my time a lot worse if she so pleases. Sooo my parents are phoned, they decide not to press charges... I am given a court date to attend, and released. The package is scooped up before a hasty retreat, and I head for the hills in shame.
At home, the folks give me sh*t (surprise). Good Lord am I ashamed, my insurance stands to go unrealistic, and I'm actually going to have a fricking criminal record. I guess I deserve it
So, is there some sort of technicality I can indignantly ride out to freedom, or do I plead guilty? (probation will be the result)
Rehab, here I come!!!
~PANIC ENSUES~
I eventually ask the guards if I'm legally allowed to leave, and they hesitate, but I eventually recieve a "yes"
"So you're sure you want to leave before the police get here?"
"Is it my legal right?"
"Well... umm I think so, maybe"
"Alright, see you!"
I hop in the van, alas too soon. It seems the rule is that I can leave, but the van stays put, so I stay to try to avoid a hefty impounding fee. Now things get worse, as they're checking my id etc. - they notice the ignition casing has been broken off, as I was trying to start her up with a screwdriver (it had been stolen not too long ago and abandoned).
Oh, wait! Having a borderline legal package in my pocket, I quickly ask if there's a bathroom still open on campus I can use.
"What, do you have to piss?"
"Errr... little bit o' both, I have chronic diahrrea..."
"Ok, go ahead"
I enter the school and ask the guard where the washroom is. As he watches me like a hawk, he replies "I'd rather you just stay here, please."
"Oh, because the 2 guards outside told me they'd rather my taking a **** in the toilet, sir."
"No."
~RUN AWAY~
I exit the front doors, and up strolls a cruiser. The package is thrown under a nearby tree right before they notice me and flash their lights. Enter the back of the cruiser, doors are locked... and I hit on the attractive driver before she tells me she's irritated with it and can make my time a lot worse if she so pleases. Sooo my parents are phoned, they decide not to press charges... I am given a court date to attend, and released. The package is scooped up before a hasty retreat, and I head for the hills in shame.
At home, the folks give me sh*t (surprise). Good Lord am I ashamed, my insurance stands to go unrealistic, and I'm actually going to have a fricking criminal record. I guess I deserve it
So, is there some sort of technicality I can indignantly ride out to freedom, or do I plead guilty? (probation will be the result)
Rehab, here I come!!!
Comment