Tribunal of the Inquisition : Case of the murder of the heretic Godking.

[civman2000]

The Defense's argument:
I have a single witness, Juan Navarro.

Senor Navarro, what relation do you have to this case?

I am a good friend of Jorge Madero and was with him when we found the head.

What was this head you found?

Just a disembodied head, in the Eastern Ocean. It looked as if a fisherman had been attacked by pirates, poor thing.

What did you do when you found the head?

Well, Pedro--one of my friends that was with us--said we should pickle it in the jar he had brought and report it to the Barcelona Harbor. Jorge, however, with that crooked smile of his, quite a creepy smile. that he has whenever he is hatching one of his practical jokes, suggested that we take it back to my shop and fix it up to make it look like someone famous.

What sort of shop do you have??

I draw faces in all sorts of media, I'm an artistic expert on faces. I sometimes am hired to make corpses look happy before being buried.

Did you follow Jorge's suggestion?

Yes. I was a bit skeptical at first, but most of the other guys thought it would be a nice trick, so we agreed to do it.

What did you do to it in your shop?

I decided to make it look like the famous heretic, GodKing.

What happened to the head after that?

Jorge took it. I thought he was going to try to scare one of his friends with it, but evidently hed took it to the King. I have no clue why.

Would you say that Jorge's "crooked smile" you mentioned earlier and his practical jokes could in some ways be inspired by Satanic powers?

Well, I wouldn't say under oath that it's true, but I think it's quite possible. A lot of the things he's done have really done a good deal of harm to people, but he still keeps doing them. And that smile is truly the creepiest and strangest smile I've ever seen.

Was the heretic GodKing murdered?

As far as I know, no.

I would also like to add that it is a well-known fact that the heresies, murders, and Satanic powers of GodKing were clearly much worse than anything I have been accused of, as well as the evidence against him much stronger, and yet while he was only exiled hanging is recommended for myself.

I rest my case.

Roberto Mayor de la Civ

[History Guy]

I'd have to ask about the prison numbers. If this was really a fraud, why were Senor GodKing's prison numbers found on the corpse, branded?

As we all know, the prison numbers were a secret, branded upon his wrist only soon before he was sent on exile. How was Senor Madero to know what they were?

Cardinal Calamari

[History Guy]

Furthermore,

I also submit two more pieces of information to the Prosecution.

Senor GodKing had a really, really, really embarrasing birthmark on the...posterior. We only knew this when he was in prison and tried to escape one day through a window, but caught his pants on a nail. If the Inquisition did not know this, how did these fishermen who had only seen his image on a WANTED sign.

Also, I must question the idea of paint. The brine that his head was preserved in would be enough to chip even the most hardy paint, or at least muck the whole thing up. Senor GodKing's features, I might add, are clear as day.

There is something rotten in Spainmark.

Cardinal Calamari

[DAVOUT]

The first thing I would like to clarify is the identity, or absence of known identity, of the two parts of the body which is the cause of our presence in this Tribunal.

Prosecutor, I understand that only the Cardinal Calamari has seen the beheaded body, and that nobody has seen the complete corps.

I understand also that the body and the head have been discovered floating about for some great time indeed, and that brings me to raise the following questions :
- you suppose that immediately after the murder the body and the head have been thrown in the sea where they remained between two and three weeks. How is it possible that they remain together all this time without beeing separated ?
- it is proven by many occurences, that a human body does not float endlessly after the death; water enter progressively into the lungs, drawing the corps toward the bottom. How this one remains in surface during such a long time ?
- the sea is a place where fishs live, and they are well known to eat almost every thing they can find and particularly meat, since they are caugh by sailors thanks to meat appropriately diplayed. How is it possible that not one fish has attack the body and the head and eaten a piece of it ?

[History Guy]

Senor Torquemada,

Perhaps it was the Will of God that the body was to be found, so that he preserved it. Would you argue with God?

Cardinal Calamari

[civman2000]

As for the supposed body of GodKing, it could be his, it could be someone else's, it could be that of the poor man the fishermen found. If it is GodKing, my best guess would be that remaining a slave of the Devil but unable to actively aid him, he doomed himself to Hell by drowning himself, and as Senor Torquemada suggested, his head was detached by hungry fish.

As for the head's features, I suspect that Senor Navarro's methods use more than just paint. You may cross-examinine him for further details on this matter if you wish.

I would also like to add that the report of Senor Navarro is his own. I did not look for him. When he heard of this trial and what his supposed friend Jorge Madero had done, he came to show us all the truth.

Roberto Mayor de la Civ

[BigFree]

Senor Torquemada, please examine the evidence I have presented once again.

It is the body of Senor GodKing that was found it has been identified by many people who knew him well, through more than just one means. The birthmark and the prison tatoo cleary show that this is indeed Senor GodKing, surely such evidence cannot be refuted.

The head that was found was found seperatley from the body. I would not have you believe that they floated together or were washed up together on Spains Eastern shores. A body does not need to float to be washed up by the currents; the same goes for the head of Senor GodKing.

As far as the testimony given by the "make-up" artist; make-up can be washed away, people that knew Senor Godking know that to be is head. But, even if the tribunal doesn't wish to believe that it is in fact Senor GodKing's head, there's no denying that we have found Senor GodKing's body with both of his hands intact. Since it has been positively indentified as Senor GodKing's body, we know that he is dead, do we not?

We know also that Senor de la Civ has tesified that the blood on his sandals was that of Senor GodKing. And since no other wounds have been found, especially not any from a missing hand, as testified to by Senor de la Civ, we can conclude that the blood came from the only wound that was found on the indentified body of Senor GodKing.

This is not heresay or circumstantial evidence, which, of those, we have plenty as well. The factual evidence points clearly to the murder of Senor GodKing by none other than Senor de la Civ.

Senor Torquemada, you must see now that Senor de la Civ's guilt is without doubt. The Body has been identified, blood was indentified as Senor GodKing's on Senor de la Civ's sandals. No wounds were found on Senor GodKing's body save that of his neck wound. This is enough evidence to convict Senor de la Civ of Senor GodKings murder. But I present further evidence.

Senor de la Civ has claimed to cut off the hand of Senor GodKing, but the hands of Senor GodKing have been found to be firmly attached. The blood on Senor de la Civ's sandals could not have come from the wounds that he has himself described, the blood could have only come from the neck wound. Senor de la Civ is not only a murderer he is guilty of perjury as well.

Senor Torquemada, you have not addressed any of the circumstantual evidence presented to you nor the statement by Senor de la Civ's own wife that showed cleary showed motive and premeditation; what do you say to this you honor?

Senor Torquemada, you have not addressed Senor de la Civ's own remarks that resemble blasphamy; what do you say to this your honor?

[Nuclear Winter]

[ooc] ´´I have not had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky´´ [/ooc]

I would like to say that Señor De La Civ´s wife assured us that he has something against the Holy inquisiton. If he really refered to teh Holy inquisition as ´´evil inquisition´´ he is not only guilty of heresy but also suspect of sabotating the Inquisition to further his own wicked ends; what is his defense to such an accusation? Is he contesting his wife´s word? Does he deems his wife as a liar? Or does he admits he is conspiring against the Inquisition and the Holy Church, and Spain, and all that is good and pure and sacred?
I´d like to hear what he has to say in his defense.

[civman2000]

I would say that my wife is a liar. As you may recall, our marriage was formed out of her saving my life and everyone thinking she was kissing me, not out of true love. I regret marrying her now. She has always been resentful about our marriage, and I suppose this is her way of getting even.

[Nuclear Winter]

Señor, we need more substantial proof than merely the opinion that your wife is a liar. You cannot think our tribunal is a joke and mock the Holy Inquisition and it´s Holy tribunal, you need to offer a proof of what you say. Show us a contraditory statement that she has said, because so far you are the one who has been caught lying about the hands of the ex-Señor GodKing.

[civman2000]

Then I will call my nephew Daniel de la Civ as a witness:

To the best of your knowledge, what did I do after the trial of GodKing ended?

As far as I know, you went back to your in-laws' home, where we were all temporarily staying. A few hours later we returned to San Agustin. We prayed together in the church for the safe birth of little Daniel--the baby--and then we all stayed at my house for a few days. You were having your house rebuilt for the baby, so you only briefly stoped by there to get a few things.

During all this time my wife and myself were with you, did you ever hear any yelling?

Yelling? Well, I know there were a few arguments between you two, but ther ewasn't any significant yelling that I remember.

Thank you, Daniel

Roberto Mayor de la Civ

[History Guy]

(Daniel, a wise boy from the back, stands up)

Wait...four weeks have elapsed since the exile.

Two weeks ago, Senor de la Civ was on the island with Senor GodKing, one week ago the body was discovered, by which point he was only three days back.

Do you mean to tell me that you never knew your wife before she saved your life, and that she held your son for only a month?

Furthermore...

(Daniel grabs the 'baby' and lifts off the bonnet)

This is not a babe, but a MONKEY in baby clothes!!

(Everyone gasps in astonished horror, even the Judges...from somewhere below the floorboards, down, from the subterranean depths of hell, a low cackling is heard, and the words "I have you now, murderer" resound from below the ground...outside, a tremendous storm tears out a giant oak that had for as long as anyone recalled stood outside the de la Civ residence in New Madrid...portents appear...the sun begins to dance around...and then it is OK again, and the trial goes on...)

[Nuclear Winter]

For St. Attila´s horse!
A MONKEY?!?!?!

[History Guy]

Well, it looks as though the baby and the gestation period don't add up. Now we know why. It's a fake baby...

St. Attila? Hey! Wait! I can't find him in the Canon!

[DAVOUT]

Senor Torquemada, you have not addressed any of the circumstantual evidence presented to you nor the statement by Senor de la Civ's own wife that showed cleary showed motive and premeditation; what do you say to this you honor?

I have just asked my first preliminary questions regarding the identity of the body and head; more are to come.

But before that, I have studied the laws of the Church and the scriptures, and this enables me to firmly state that the Church has not yet recognized that women had a soul. Therefore this Tribunal cannot, in all fairness and lawfulness, receive the testimony of a being with no soul : any noise made with her mouth is of no inquisitorial value, and I ask the judges to consider the so-called testimony of the accused s wife as not having been delivered and forget its content.