'I'm so bad at Civ IV that'...

[tedge20]

. . . my Great Artists are Ed Wood, Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohan.

. . . the first tech I can research is "Standing Upright."

. . . priests sabotaged my construction of the Rock 'n Roll wonder.

. . . my ranking was somewhere between William Henry Harrison and Spiro Agnew.

. . . my citizens welcomed a nuclear meltdown because they finally had heat.

. . . my workers unionized and went on strike. (Hmmm, random event for Civ V?!)

. . . when I attacked the French, they catapulted cows at my troops.

[Lancer]

"catapulted cows"

...I blew my nose and the soiled tissue had a higher cultural value than my Civ!

...My wife told me to take out the garbage so I deleted my game!

...My dog ate my keyboard and doubled the size of my civ!

[Addled Platypus]

when I launch the game it says "good luck Dan Quale"

when I mouse over the troops, they moon me

[peef_the_okay]

- I read this thread and envy the other people's accomplishments

[Cartimandua]

Originally posted by Lancer
...I go to 'girls playing Civ' for tips!

Wow! You really are bad!


...Montezuma even takes pity on me and leaves me alone.

...the only Great Artist my Civ can get is K-Fed.

...Friendly fire is the primary cause of death in my military.

[Will9]

...I had to use DanQ and Imran as an excuse to create a pre-settler level.

[Yosho]

..I know a lot of people lose to barbarians. But I'm so bad at civ, my entire empire was destroyed by a wolf.

[Will9]

That must be pretty bad considering animals aren't allowed within a square of your borders.

[Yosho]

Originally posted by Will
That must be pretty bad considering animals aren't allowed within a square of your borders.

Well, no, not normally...you see, I was trying to domesticate the wolf to invent dogs, and, uh, things did not go according to plan...

[Will9]

[faded glory]

i have leave 90% of the multiplayers i host

simply because my chariots are no match for maceman


FG

[DanQ]

Originally posted by Will
...I had to use DanQ as an excuse to create a pre-settler level.

You left off Imran.

[Addled Platypus]

...my mouse rolled over and played dead

[LzPrst]

-i told my scientists I needed a bulletproof armored vehicle. and they made a boxcar. out of cardboard

-i told my submarines to hide, and now I can't find them!

-my citizens all had three legs. then I discovered physics and saw my capital was built on Uranium

-my capital gets culture crushed by a size 2 egyptian city

-i wiped out every other civ and I still only had 11% of the world population

[Will9]

Originally posted by DanQ

You left off Imran.

Edited