So a girl asked for my number

[Barnabas]

My big issue is that whenever I see a hot girl, for example, in the Subway, I think, what if the only reason I am with my girlfriend is that I met her before this girl I am undressing mentally in the subway? Perhaps if I met both of them at the same time in a party I would have prefered subway girl.
I like my girlfriend and find her sexually attractive, but every day on the streets, subway, work, city I saw hot girls who might be very nice. How can you sure that you love the person you are with then?

[Jon Miller]

I don't think that way.

If I was just after sexual attraction, I would.

JM

[giblets]

Well, of course. I'll take that to mean I come across as wise and accomplished.

Relative to Al? Yes.

[Ecthy]

My big issue is that whenever I see a hot girl, for example, in the Subway, I think, what if the only reason I am with my girlfriend is that I met her before this girl I am undressing mentally in the subway? Perhaps if I met both of them at the same time in a party I would have prefered subway girl.
I like my girlfriend and find her sexually attractive, but every day on the streets, subway, work, city I saw hot girls who might be very nice. How can you sure that you love the person you are with then?

You can be sure because you stay with them well knowing that feeling attracted to another person on the street means nothing in love terms. Imagine you'd lose her, are you sure you'd get into a new relationship all that quickly? Think twice.

[MRT144]

My big issue is that whenever I see a hot girl, for example, in the Subway, I think, what if the only reason I am with my girlfriend is that I met her before this girl I am undressing mentally in the subway? Perhaps if I met both of them at the same time in a party I would have prefered subway girl.
I like my girlfriend and find her sexually attractive, but every day on the streets, subway, work, city I saw hot girls who might be very nice. How can you sure that you love the person you are with then?

If you're happy in your relationship why do you even care about the what ifs? It seems odd to seriously be conflicted about whether or not you love one person because you didn't potentially love other people.

[C0ckney]

My big issue is that whenever I see a hot girl, for example, in the Subway, I think, what if the only reason I am with my girlfriend is that I met her before this girl I am undressing mentally in the subway? Perhaps if I met both of them at the same time in a party I would have prefered subway girl.
I like my girlfriend and find her sexually attractive, but every day on the streets, subway, work, city I saw hot girls who might be very nice. How can you sure that you love the person you are with then?

you see a hot girl, think "i'd like to bone her" and then you invent some situation in your head about being with her, maybe a great love affair, to give some credibility to your original reaction and then you start wondering if you really love your girlfriend because of this love affair you've just created in your head. i've caught myself doing this once or twice. it's silly. it's just your dick talking and your brain putting a romantic gloss on it. you shouldn't take it too seriously.

[Nikolai]

Nope. Sexuality is a spectrum. I'm 100% sure of it. My experience with men who've said the exact same thing as you at some point tells me this as well.

It's not gay or homophobic. People who have really strong reactions to the thought of gay sex (like committing suicide as an alternative... ) are obviously trying to convince themselves more than others. It's not homophobia so much as self-denial.

I can agree with that. But there is a line somewhere where you go from no-way-I-would-have-sex-with-a-man, to I'm-not-opposed-to-the-thought. Myself, I am solidly in the nono to having any gay sex, it's not something I'm remotely attracted to. But I can see beauty in men, and see why someone would like a person. I love to tease male friends with jokes about the topic, as it's real fun to see their reactions. None of this makes me gay in any way, but I think it points to there being shades. Some are gay, some are hetero, some are both. Most is in the area between those three.

[Nikolai]

I don't really agree with Pax's position, I do agree with this position (if you really want her).

If you don't, just stop answering her texts.

JM

This is good advice.

[ZEE]

There are professional pimps themselves that check this thread for dating advice, knowing that posters on the sub-forum of a known cult-PC game are the top-tier candidates for such things.

[Al B. Sure!]

It probably seems off because I'm going through my own relationship crisis right now and I'm hardly in a position to give advice but I was essentially saying as Tupac clarified don't cut her off and don't even let her know that you don't want to be an also ran. Just play it cool. There is a reason that the guy is an EX. She may have forgotten but if she broke up with him she will remember soon enough. Al, feelings for another person can grow and feelings can also fade. I am saying that as long as you don't fall into the just a friend trap the feelings this girl has for you can grow. Also she seems like the best prospect for you at present time.

It's not working. She stopped responding to my texts. She had phone issues recently so it's possible her phone is not working, but it doesn't look good. It's strange because she would text me even after she started pining for her ex on facebook but now, seemingly randomly, she's ignoring me.

[Dinner]

Get a match.com account and realize that only 1 in 10 emails will end up in a date but go on enough dates and you'll find a girl who does like you for who you are. Think of it as practice.

[Provost Harrison]

Well I never got anywhere...it's like pissing in the wind, and even when I did get dates I never seemed to meet anyone.

Online dating sucks

[Tupac Shakur]

Get a match.com account and realize that only 1 in 10 emails will end up in a date but go on enough dates and you'll find a girl who does like you for who you are. Think of it as practice.

Wrong. Albie needs to get on Grindr, not match.com.

[MOBIUS]

It's not working. She stopped responding to my texts. She had phone issues recently so it's possible her phone is not working, but it doesn't look good. It's strange because she would text me even after she started pining for her ex on facebook but now, seemingly randomly, she's ignoring me.

The main question is: did you get to bone her?

I wasn't paying attention, so I'm mildly interested...

[Az]

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.

This girl I knew who came back to Philly for grad school asked me a few weeks ago if, hypothetically as women do, she were to ask me if I would have casual sex with her, would I be interested? Before getting your blood boiling, she was not asking me if I wanted to, but asking me if she were to ask me, would I do it, as some sort of meta-question. Of course, I said no.