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Fun little hickie anecdote...
A couple of years ago, I was roped into "volunteering" for a charity golf tournament (Voluntold is more like it, but I digress). I had to meet a group of employees at 5:30 am at a Whataburger and convoy them to the event.
Well, the night before I went out drinking, as per usual, and ended up hooking up with a girl I met at Little Woodrow's. Unfortunately, this girl was both a bit of a nympho and a bit of a biter, if by a bit, I actually mean insanely into. Normally, this would have been fine, but I only manage to get about 45 minutes of sleep, and wake up with the left side of my neck showing 3 or 4 major hickies. I was also still drunk, noticeably so.
So I meet my employees, let them make jokes (they expected this of me), and took everyone to the charity event, where we basically had to caddy around a bunch of rich ****s playing golf for charity, driving their golf carts and listening to their stupid ass stories.
This would all have been tolerable - barely - except that my District HR Manager also showed up, unexpectedly. Since I was the highest-ranking person from my company (other than her) at the event, she spent much of her time in close proximity to me. This, in turn, meant I spent as much time as possible talking away from her (so she wouldn't smell my breath), and trying to as naturally as possible hold my neck, so she wouldn't spot the hickies.
It was awkward. Somehow, I kept my job.
A couple of years ago, I was roped into "volunteering" for a charity golf tournament (Voluntold is more like it, but I digress). I had to meet a group of employees at 5:30 am at a Whataburger and convoy them to the event.
Well, the night before I went out drinking, as per usual, and ended up hooking up with a girl I met at Little Woodrow's. Unfortunately, this girl was both a bit of a nympho and a bit of a biter, if by a bit, I actually mean insanely into. Normally, this would have been fine, but I only manage to get about 45 minutes of sleep, and wake up with the left side of my neck showing 3 or 4 major hickies. I was also still drunk, noticeably so.
So I meet my employees, let them make jokes (they expected this of me), and took everyone to the charity event, where we basically had to caddy around a bunch of rich ****s playing golf for charity, driving their golf carts and listening to their stupid ass stories.
This would all have been tolerable - barely - except that my District HR Manager also showed up, unexpectedly. Since I was the highest-ranking person from my company (other than her) at the event, she spent much of her time in close proximity to me. This, in turn, meant I spent as much time as possible talking away from her (so she wouldn't smell my breath), and trying to as naturally as possible hold my neck, so she wouldn't spot the hickies.
It was awkward. Somehow, I kept my job.
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