I guess I wanted someone else to know as well

[Pekka]

Doesn't matter. If this are not improving soon, I'm not Pekka anymore.

And I'm not so much a romantic as I am desperate.

[Jon Miller]

Why can't you do what I suggest? Find a freind to crash at, say that you are burnout or used too many drugs or something. Just recover?

JM

[Darius871]

Go rent that flick Into the Wild. That guy faced a similar predicament and after some time with no identity it all came to a happy ending I think.

[DaShi]

Originally posted by Pekka
I'm being misunderstood. I know you people mean good.

I don't Pekka!

In fact, you should look up that Australian guy who's selling his entire life. Friends, possessions, and all.

Dang, there might be some money in trading other peoples lives.

[Pekka]

That's really ****ing funny. That's pretty much the communication I want to do with you guys.

[kittenOFchaos]

Pekka, I hope you're okay and you've not done anything too rash.

I don't really venture to Apolyton much these days, and I only came on to see one of your threads. I came to see that energy you bring, that enthusiasm and that you seem to manage with next to nothing in the bank.

I've gone through an absolutely rotten period recently, and my fiance left me and did it in such a cold way. I'm so far from friends and family too, yet I've been lucky, people at work, even my exs friends and people online have supported me magnificently.

The story you tell of your ex, harming herself that way is really disturbing and I'll be quick to respond should my ex-fiance ever send a message saying she is sorry for how she treated me. She is one mixed up girl as well.

I've had periods of misery and shunned human contact, but been lucky with my family. The best thing for you Pekka is to seek out those people that care for you and just get some comfort. From that position re-evaluate what you really want to do, take a less stressful position and just survive this period, things will get better.

That and getting back to exercise are key, if I had sat and vegetated during my breakup, I'd have cracked.


Good luck Pekka, hope to hear from you soon.

[SlowwHand]

Originally posted by Jon Miller
Wait, did you sign stuff with your current job saying that you can't work elsewhere for some time?

JM

There's no such thing. He shouldn't give away trade secrets, but I would never let any paper stop me from working. Working beats the hell out of not working.
Facilitates eating.

[Pekka]

I have no such deal with my employer. I can work where ever I wish with no time delay.

However I am not about to give this one up. It won't change all teh other things in my life right now. I need to get this one working for me, other things will follow. I'm not a quitter. I don't have much left anymore, so I just might as well complete this sucker, if I don't, I'll blame it on the job. Finishing this job will result in less bitterness.

They'll have to shoot me to take it away from me and I mean it literally. Even if I get fired I'll still just go there and work. I don't care. This is MY job.

[SlowwHand]

"They'll have to shoot me to take it away from me and I mean it literally. Even if I get fired I'll still just go there and work. I don't care. This is MY job."

Ok, that's a little too much passion about a job.

[Pekka]

kitten, not doing much better. I haven't gone to the office for quite a while, I'm working from home now. I'm actually on a long sick leave, but I've got nothing else to do so I'm working from home. Yeah, I know, it's sad, but so what. Also, sorry to hear about your break up. Hopefully everything will work out for you.

Anyways, I was diagnosed and basically my evaluation rocketed the indexes into new championship results in burn out and other related things such as depression. Oh well. I should be in hospital by now I guess. Being fed food and going *Droolidrool* but what can I say. They have to shoot me to quit this job.

[Pekka]

It's common sense Sloww.

It's like... this job is like a woman. You want to have sex with this woman but first she wants something else. So in the process you lose everything, including your money, health, everything. So now you REALLY want to have sex with this woman, because you can't just not have sex with her now, it costed too much already.

[DaShi]

Pekka, if this woman turns out to be a man again, you're gonna be really pissed.

[Pekka]

Wow, I just had a very surreal experience. My doorbell rung and it was a PM from another project who I know. So I was like wtf. I opened the door, realizing I'm having my survivor beard and I look like I've been isolated for a long time: Well it is true. But I REALLY look like it too. Fortunately I had just showered so I wasnt' smelling too bad.

So I open the door, I kind of don't want to but heck, I figure it must be important because he came to my place. No one has come to my place from work yet so I opened the door reluctantly. So as I open the door I notice he had brought other people as well, no less than head of the department. wtf? Now this is getting akward fast. AND his secretary. Damn it.

It looked very official, so I'm like great, they're going to fire me while I'm on my sick leave. Nice!

They asked me if I want to go somewhere and I'm like... whaat? And they'r elike they'll take me. And I'm like whaaaat? Take me where? This doesn't look good.

But they just wanted to talk. So we went to the work, to the office (way past work time), to the office of head of the department. Akwaaaard! But I don't care.

So they just wanted to know if I'm ok. That's all. They were just worried. It was cool, they even gave me some food to take home. So i guess that makes me the official bum there, right? I know, they wanted to know if I had killed myself or something or if I will. So they didn't know how to ask it so I just said don't worry, I'm not self destructive. Then we just chatted for an hour and had coffee. Weird.

Weird to be picked up by head of the department who I don't know, at night. But they gave me food and stuff. Yeah, I'm definitely a bum.

[Wezil]

They wanted you to flash them.

You missed the clues.

[Pekka]

You know, I was thinking about it. Now they like... now they KNOW I might like do stuff that's out of the ordinary. Perhaps when I get back to work. Could be soon. Thursday I either get more sick leave or back to work. We'll see.