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What is the dumbest thing you've heard anybody say?

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  • #1

    What is the dumbest thing you've heard anybody say?

    My wife and I were watching some show on TV that had to do with tornados (I don't recall if it was a newscast or a Discovery Channel documentary). Anyway, they were interviewing one man after his house got destroyed and, sounding as if he'd been betrayed somehow, managed to say the following:

    "This thing didn't sound like no freight train I ever heard. Not once did I hear a..." he then makes a pulling motion with his right arm "choo-choo."

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  • #2
    "I'm telling you, it's the true, i saw it on TV!!"
    <Kassiopeia> you don't keep the virgins in your lair at a sodomising distance from your beasts or male prisoners. If you devirginised them yourself, though, that's another story. If they devirginised each other, then, I hope you had that webcam running.
    Play Bumps! No, wait, play Slings!

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    • #3
      OK. This is a different sort of stupid, and it was me.

      A group of us were really tired one night, and were just generally diving on and attacking those who had the couch in a room at the student hostel. During one of my many dive-in and attacks, I called out "Suicide dive!"

      One of the couch-holders' girlfriends had committed suicide just two weeks beforehand. Everything suddenly went quiet.

      I need a "Stupid" tattoo on my forehead.
      Consul.

      Back to the ROOTS of addiction. My first missed poll!

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      • #4
        I have to say, my grandad said the most ammusing thing ive ever heard ..

        I found a word puzzel in a box of corn flakes, you know, the kind where you have tiles with letters on, and you move them about trying to get ABC,DEF,GH .. etc .. well, he's not known for his interests in puzzels , so I was suprised when he asked to look at it .. 10 minutes later, he was still stairing at it .. I wondered .. could it be he's actually trying to work it out, without just trying to get there bit by bit ...

        Then he looked up and said "THERE'S ONE MISSING" ...!!!!

        It has to be one of the funniest moments of my life ..
        "Wherever wood floats, you will find the British" . Napoleon

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        • #5
          One of my old friends from high school and I were watching TV one night. A commercial with Sally Struthers for "save the children" or some other corrupt charity came on. My friend said this:

          "You know, I'm surprised at how smart some of those third world people are. Most of the little kids can speak foreign languages!"

          I'm not kidding, he really said this. And he wasn't stoned/drunk.
          To us, it is the BEAST.

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          • #6
            There was this girl in my high school who had a tendency to not think before she spoke. She said some of the most stupid things I can ever recall. For instance, one of our teachers was saying how his wife would always have to work late since she was a corporate executive, and then this girl Lisa said "She gets home at 8?! Well then who cooks the dinner?"

            Another time, in English, we were discussing whether or not you can tell the difference between a woman and man writer. Lisa at one point said,"you can tell its a woman because the diction isn't so elevated."
            "The only dangerous amount of alcohol is none"-Homer Simpson

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            • #7
              When I was in 7th grade (1991 or so) I had a friend who was trying to free up hard drive space. He was browsing his HD and he said, "what's DOS? (he pronounced it dose) I don't play DOS, I'm gonna delete it". He did, and I wasn't surprised the next day when he phoned me whining about his computer not working .
              To us, it is the BEAST.

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              • #8
                My worst one was a few years back. I saw a girl that used to work for me that I knew was pregnant. Being a personal type manager.........I saw her and asked her when the baby was due.

                After a pregnant pause she looked up and said that she had had the baby 3 weeks prior. DOH

                RAH
                It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

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                • #9
                  One of the stupidest things I have ever heard someone say:

                  "The Holocaust never happened."

                  This was from some hate monger who was interviewed by some magazine.
                  A lot of Republicans are not racist, but a lot of racists are Republican.

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                  • #10
                    The most stupid thing is when someone has just died and the reporters ask the family members "How do you feel"?

                    I think this merits automatic execution (of the reporter)

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                    • #11
                      In my international relations class there's this one poor dolt who is such a bleeding realist it makes me want to puke. Anyways, he consistantly says things like "Well, if Belgium tries to overrule us in the UN, we'll just invade and kill them all" and "You don't **** with the US or we'll nuke you, it's just that simple" etc. Me and my liberal friends just sit and laugh
                      "Chegitz, still angry about the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991?
                      You provide no source. You PROVIDE NOTHING! And yet you want to destroy capitalism.. you criminal..." - Fez

                      "I was hoping for a Communist utopia that would last forever." - Imran Siddiqui

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                      • #12
                        My step brother had a period when he was pretty anti-immigrants/pseudo-racist in his adolecent. At the dinner table we had a argument about it and he shouted out:

                        "I'm gonna move to a country where they don't allow any immigrant!!"

                        After that unfortunate sentence his views started to improve

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Kropotkin

                          "I'm gonna move to a country where they don't allow any immigrant!!"

                          Classic
                          This is the winner so far.
                          It's almost as if all his overconfident, absolutist assertions were spoonfed to him by a trusted website or subreddit. Sheeple
                          RIP Tony Bogey & Baron O

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Kropotkin
                            My step brother had a period when he was pretty anti-immigrants/pseudo-racist in his adolecent. At the dinner table we had a argument about it and he shouted out:

                            "I'm gonna move to a country where they don't allow any immigrant!!"

                            After that unfortunate sentence his views started to improve
                            15


                            "If it wasn't for my horse, I'd have never gone to college."
                            “As a lifelong member of the Columbia Business School community, I adhere to the principles of truth, integrity, and respect. I will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”
                            "Capitalism ho!"

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                            • #15
                              Some will notice a "few" posts are missing.

                              NOW... Let's keep this funny and NOT USE IT TO INSULT MEMBERS OF THIS SITE!

                              So just chill...
                              And don't tempt me today! So let it drop!
                              Keep on Civin'
                              RIP rah, Tony Bogey & Baron O

                              Comment

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