I'm on drugs

[Urban Ranger]

I always take "no" for a "no."

I figured, if a woman like you enough, she would not play hard to get. If she does, she's not the sort of women I want to have a long term relation with, anyway.

[Spiffor]

Originally posted by skywalker


What does pride have to do with it? We're sophomores - most people don't hook up until junior or senior year. If she doesn't feel ready to go beyond "a bit more than friends" then I'm not going to try and pressure her.

That's not to say I'm not going to keep doing what I've been doing. We just aren't going to dive headfirst into a strong relationship.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

[Az]

UR is completely right.

[Monk]

Originally posted by Urban Ranger
I always take "no" for a "no."

I figured, if a woman like you enough, she would not play hard to get. If she does, she's not the sort of women I want to have a long term relation with, anyway.

Wishy-washy PC stuff! Skywalker, I'm not going to advise anybody to stop being nice and caring, but you've got to remember that our physical attraction is based on a lot more than who is being nice to us. We're talking different scales here, and personally, I've always found my female friends relatively un-attractive despite them being fine companions (a great advantage, by the way).

If you guys have to continue having unsexy relations to each other for now, I guess that's the way it's got to be, but at the very least you should do some flirting or some other measures to excite her and maintain some kind of pseudo-romantic relationship. In romantic affairs, there's nothing wrong with the old saying that you should just be yourself, but remember that being yourself doesn't exclude the possibility of a highly strategic battle plan to accomplish the task.

[Dr Strangelove]

Don't listen to these guys! Just go out and have a good time. You will do better for yourself if you cement the personal bond between the two of you rather than pushing things.

[Theben]

Originally posted by Boshko

That sounds like nothing but a Kiss of Death to me, but of course the age of the people we're talking about throws things out of wack...

I think she's a little young to be wanting an intellectual whore.

[Spiffor]

UR is exaclty wrong

Had I followed his advice, I would still be alone

[Drogue]

Originally posted by Spiffor
We were complete strangers in September, we were acquaintances in November - December, and we made out in January. Not too quick, n ot too slow. Just that we were attracted to each other, and still are

That does seem quite slow. Verres and I was the other way. It didn't feel quick at all, but she told me she liked me the first night we met. By the end of the week we were going out on dates. 3 weeks after we'd met she went on holiday for 2 weeks, and I've never felt so lonely By that time I already felt so 'into' the relationship that it was a huge part of my life. By the time she got back I'd booked tickets for us to go away to a music festival together for the weekend. It didn't feel weird at all going away together after knowing each other just over a month, it already felt serious and comitted. Even now, each day seems like such a long time, that having a day without seeing her makes me miss her At the time I remember thinking "doesn't this seem a little fast to feel like this" which was quickly answered with a "no" We spent a lot of time together, and it didn't feel that quick. I remember after about 2 weeks of going out we went to Oxford for the day, since I was expecting to go there for Uni, and she was looking at applying, and when we walked into one college I talked my way in, and when asked, she said she was "his girlfriend", and it just made me smile so much. I knew we were together by then, but it didn't really sink in until she said that

Anyways, the point I was trying to make ( ) was that however fast or slow things go, when it's right it doesn't seem fast or slow. For a usual relationship, what happened with Verres and I would seem fast, and Spiffor and Mrs. Spiffor would seem slow, but neither felt it too fast or slow, because they were 'right'

We really are lucky

[Drogue]

Originally posted by Spiffor
Does this just mean she's open for a wild sexual relationship without even commitment?

Go Sky

Seriously though, I think it sounds pretty healthy. She seems to like you, which if you're anything like me, will make you feel happy, even if she doesn't want a relationship.

Here's to being lucky in love

[Drogue]

Originally posted by Oncle Boris
It all depends on how large your ego is. Personally, I can't stand hanging with a girl who probably knows of my intentions, but will let me wait for the sake of her proudness.

I know what you mean. I kinda agree. I would feel some sort of resentment for a girl who left me hanging just because she felt like it, but it depends on the reason. If she wasn't sure she wanted to start a relationship, or any reason really, I'd be happy to wait. But if it's just because she wants to keep me hanging when she knows what she's going to say, then the only reason seems to be at my expense, which isn't a good way to start a relationship, IMHO. If someone is doing something that they know adversely affects me, when they don't have a reason to, then that isn't the best way to start a relationship.

I also half agree with UR. It depends on why she's playing hard to get. Many people I've seen are 'told' that it's the best way to get someone interested, or that it's the 'done thing', or put pressure on to. Some may feel not ready for a relationship. Some may just be scared of getting hurt, and so not wanting to jump in. There are many reasons where playing hard to get isn't just playing hard to get, it has a reason behind it. However when it is just that, playing with someones feelings, then I agree it isn't a good way to start a relationship. I know many girls do it, just for kicks, I'm just very lucky that my wonderful Louisey (I will get killed for 'cutening' her name ) was honest with me about her feelings It's not like I would have got the hints anytime soon anyway...

[Urban Ranger]

Originally posted by Spiffor
UR is exaclty wrong

Had I followed his advice, I would still be alone

Nothing wrong with being alone. Love is nice, even great. I don't see why people who don't have a SO are referred to as "losers." That just does not make sense to me.

[Urban Ranger]

Originally posted by Drogue
Some may feel not ready for a relationship. Some may just be scared of getting hurt, and so not wanting to jump in. There are many reasons where playing hard to get isn't just playing hard to get, it has a reason behind it.

Yes, you are right. If a woman has a good reason of not being in a relationship for now instead of just playing hard to get, that's great. I will give her as much time as she needs to get ready.

Okay, a reasonable period of time.

[Fake Boris]

Originally posted by Spiffor
Paiktis

If I was like Boris, I would still be a losser by now

There is also a cultural thing. What would be merely 'galanterie' in France is considered 'harassment' by the feminazis in Quebec.

[Verres]

Originally posted by Drogue

I know many girls do it, just for kicks, I'm just very lucky that my wonderful Louisey (I will get killed for 'cutening' her name )

You really do have no regard for your personal safety, do you?

[Kuciwalker]

I guess that's what I have to look forward to