Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

The Jungle Gazette: Volume XXVII

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • The Jungle Gazette: Volume XXVII

    The Jungle Gazette



    Your Light in the Jungle Since 1730 BC - November 11, 940 AD

    From the Editor:
    Welcome to the latest installment of the Jungle Gazette. It’s been a long time coming but I am proud to continue this with the help of adaMada, Zeit, Godking and others. When Unorthodox sailed for the great unknown, there was no certainty that this great tradition would continue. But we persevered, and through some tough times as well. A lot has happened in the last weeks, both in real life for those involved as well as in our glorious nation of Apolytonia. I would like to also note that we have done our best to be fair and balanced, without bias. Let it be known now as it has been in the past that the Jungle Gazette is an Independent journal, with known affiliations to both political parties but with no influence taken from those with a political agenda. This is not a political paper, but instead a record of history and culture that we have built for ourselves in Apolyton. Thank you all for your support, I would also like to thank foremost adaMada for his devotion in these last days and to Zeit for all the support he’s given. And to those writers who have volunteered, there will most certainly be more editions and all help are welcome.
    Thank you,
    Meshelic

    Note from the Publisher
    Due to many issues, both in real life and in game, this Gazette has been delayed several times. We finally release this Gazette several weeks after UnOrthOdOx published the last. We hope to be able to provide more regular editions in the future, but we do apologize for the delay. We also understand that a lot has happened in this time, and (as such) this Gazette covers many events - some recent, some not. We ask you to be considerate, and to remember that all articles were accurate at the time of writing. For the benefit of our readers, we have done our best to ensure that articles covering earlier events are located earlier in the paper. We have also inserted several smaller articles to cover major events of the past month, so that readers are informed of previous events. Again, I apologize for the delay.

    Thank you,
    adaMada

    The Lost Civilizations are found!
    Apolytonian sailors are the first to set foot upon the foreign continent

    At the year 750AD our brave sailors have reached the shores of the once unknown nation of China. The journey had begun with the acquisition of Ocean Navigation, and under the leadership of SMC Aggie and appointed Admiral Shiber and Admiral Meshelic, our ships sailed southeast towards the lost world. The fruits of this effort were not late to come- China traded us contacts with the Zulus and India, and an intensive trade session was initiated under the guidance of our Foreign Affairs Ministry. Our coffers were filled in with the foreigner’s gold, and the total gains are: 55Gpt, 72G, Furs and Gems, all of this for some of our techs and maps. As it turned out, the three nations (China, India and Zululand) were far behind us in technology, although India suppresses us with its culture and its population is quite big. Zulu seems to control the world’s Gem deposits with 11(!!!) sources.
    Check the full Report here: http://apolyton.net/showthread.php?threadid=65542

    The sailors themselves were quite excited about the new land which they found, but were disappointed by the poor quality of edible fruits in China, especially the Outrageous lack of bananas. Despite the tiredness of the men, the order was given to carry on with the mission, to find Japan, but despite our efforts, Rome was first to reach it’s shores, and we acquired contact with Tokugawa, the Japanese leader, from them, on 790AD. Soon thereafter, Apolytonian influence was already felt on the Japanese island, and already one can purchase goods such as Banana Sushi and Banana Misu (the Japanese soup) at the local markets, even at the small town of Echizen. The Japanease, on their part, agreed to sale us some of their fine Silks. Japan, isolated on it’s two islands, seems to be in a position of a major power, despite it’s technologically backward state. (Banano-San, Kyoto).

    As was planned by the Foreign Affairs Minister, Togas, the three contacts with the Civilization on which we had monopoly (India, China and Zululand) along with our newly researched (=discovered by OUR scientists) Printing Press technology, were bartered for the cutting edge technologies of Physics, Metallurgy and Military Tradition, in one our nation most fruitful Tech-Trades. These new technologies have place Apolytonia in the first row of scientific advanced nation such as Germany and England. Our president, MrWhereIsItAt, has posted his optimistic response on the matter:
    ” With 40% Science we can make about 300Lpt and get Demo(cracy) in about 16 turns, IIRC. For the first time we may be able to stand on our own feet for science!”

    Join the Discussion regarding the Lost Civs:

    Machiavelli Institution: Analysis of the Lost Civs-


    What finding the lost civs given us-


    Zeit, Apolytonia.

    Intercepted German Communication!
    Communication from German Ambassador to Bismark intercepted
    (Letter written to Chancellor Bismarck from Erich von Bueglof, diplomatic envoy in Apolyton)

    To Chancellor Bismarck,
    Glory to the Empire and to you Herr Bismarck, who I pray is in good health and good spirits! I have arrived here safely in Apolyton City and have been received very hospitably by their President and his ministers, all of whom I have been very impressed with. As you know, their people have once again elected MrWhereItsAt to its highest honor. Their recent celebrations across their country reflect the approval that they have of
    MrWhereItsAt and his cabinet.
    For all this celebration however, I must inform you that the atmosphere here is ripe for war, and from what I’ve gathered some people here have been calling for battle with our mutual neighbor, France. I’m sure you’ve heard the reports recently of the recent debacle at their President’s coronation where three men attempted to assassinate him in front of all the people. Apparently these assassins originated from France and this has caused quite a furor across all of Apolytonia.
    Some here are calling it the “end of France”, others are more peaceful and seek to resolve this diplomatically. Certainly this is a place to watch closely, as the whole scope of politics for our continent may be changing before our very own eyes.
    On a more civilized note, I have visited many great projects here that truly display the grandeur of this fair nation. The Pyramids in Muncia are one of the most astounding sights and are truly great feats of engineering. Their Pyramids are rivaled only by their Sistine Chapel in the great city of Ubergorsk. It is certainly beautiful, and is a glorious temple which they built as a place of worship towards their gOdz and their deity, the Great Banana.
    I also have had a chance to visit Sun Tzu’s Art of War, a mighty academy which trains their most elite soldiers and officers. I am sure they are quite busy there, as I myself have noticed that many of the Apolytonian men are being recruited and trained for the oncoming war, which I believe is unavoidable it seems.
    I shall no longer take up any more of your time, Herr Bismarck. I hope everything is fine in our beloved Germany.

    Erich von Bueglof
    Ambassador to Apolyton

    War!
    Senate declares War on France
    Apolytonia has thirsted for blood ever since France evilly attacked the Apolytonian Government. After much deliberation among the Senate, War was declared. Before the Gazette could even begin coverage on the war, however, France was crushed under the valiant Apolytonian Armies, lead by General Aggie. Apolytonia gained approximately eight French cities in the battle.

    Congratulations to our armies on their epic victory, and long live Apolytonia!

    -- adaMada

    NewCon Passes!
    Today, in a surprise washout, NewCon was passed by a shocking 91%. With only three senators voting against, the level of support was surprising, especially considering the number of citizens who had voiced concerns after the first draft was released to the public. “Beautiful document, the ConCon really did a wonderful job.” City Planner E_T commented. SMC and Presidential Candidate Aggie reaffirmed his support, saying, “It is a great step forward for our great nation and comes right as we enter a new democratic era.” Non-elected citizens also approved of the new constitution in general, with comments such as “I'm sure this new Constitution will usher in a new, glorious age for Apolytonia - until the next cry for revolution, that is.” (Kloreep)

    The first term under the New CoL will be Term 6. The CoL itself will take full affect on the eighteenth, while the portions pertaining to voting take affect on the twelfth.

    -- adaMada

    Election Nominations!
    Term 6 Government will follow New Constitution
    The Term 6 governmental election nominations are drawing to a close as this article goes to press. The Term 6 Government will adhere to the new Constitution, meaning that there will be only four elected positions: President, Domestic Minister, Supreme Military Commander, and Foreign Affairs Minister. The nominations thread can be found here. Voting will commence on the 12th and end on the 15th, allowing the new government three days before it takes power to situate itself and to give time for runoffs and Vice-Presidential appointments.

    Please remember to go to the polls and vote!

    -- adaMada

    Peacemaker to SMC?
    By GodKing
    I feel the world has turned upside down. It appears that Thud, our resident peacenik, has turned into a war monger. As the official head of the DIA, or “those tree hugging, peace loving, free speech, no I will not own a gun group of Hippy do-gooders” as I saw in a quote once, many people were down right shocked at his announcement to run for SMC in the upcoming elections.

    Our current SMC Aggie was quoted as saying “I knew the new elections were going to bring out all sorts of new people, but this….”

    Former SMC UberKruX was heard to say “Time to reactivate the Republican Guard before it all falls apart.”

    At the announcement of his candidacy, the price of stock for the Duff Beer Company doubled. A coincidence? Many do not think so.

    At the time of this report, nobody has announced their candidacy in opposition to Thud. It is not known if the loss of Thud’s adopted brother, Duddha, in the latest French campaign, has had anything to do with his decision to join in the way of the blade. Thud was unavailable for comment. Duddha remains missing, and is presumed dead, despite rumor that he is currently living in Ninot’s Mansion with Joan de Frog as his wife.

    GK

    Influential Players leave; Veterans return
    UnOrthOdOx, Aro, MWIA leave; Spiffor and Tassador return

    The past several weeks have seen much activity within the forums. UnOrthOdOx, Aro, and MWIA, three of our most honored and respected citizens, were forced to take leaves of absence that they may travel and tend to issues in their real lives. They all hope to return in the future, and I would ask that all please join the Gazette staff and myself in honoring them and wishing them the best of tides till they may return. UnOrthOdOx served as Vice President during Term Three, began the Directory Project, founded the Gazette, and served as the Gazette’s primary publisher during his time here. Aro founded the Apolytonian Geographic Society, and was a frequent contributor to the Gazette through his wonderful editorial cartoons. MrWhereItsAt was the only person to serve as president twice, during the third term and the fifth. All will be greatly missed, and I ask that everyone please join myself and the Jungle Gazette staff in wishing them the best of tides, and hoping that they return in the near future.

    On a happier note, two veteran players who were forced to leave in the past have returned to Apolytonia. Tassadar5000, a Gazette Editor, and Spiffor, a past Minister of the Economy, have returned to Apolytonia. We are honored by their participation, and anxiously wait to see what they will accomplish now they have returned.

    -- adaMada

    New Court Case
    The Apolytonian Court has just taken on what perhaps may be its most epic and controversial case yet. In Court Case #5, Mr. Orange charges that Minister of the Economy Reddawg infringed on his constitutional rights in his accusations that his review of Apolytonia’s defenses could only be created by playing ahead. Mr. Orange charges that Reddawg’s position as an elected official makes him responsible for providing accurate information to the public. Reddawg has since withdrawn his accusation, but the manner is now in the hands of the court.

    The public has been very vocal so far on this case, with prominent citizens taking both sides. Though the period for public comment is over, the Gazette implores all citizens to go to the courthouse and hear the arguments from both sides.

    -- adaMada

    Jungle Ball Update - Week 9
    Rankings in Flux

    The past several weeks have been very interesting ones on the JungleBall field. The highly ranked Ubergorsk Irons fell from 2nd place to 4th on three consecutive losses (including one to the lowest ranked team, the Apolytonia Archers), while the vaunted 1st place Geofront Evas lost for only the second time this season. The Week 10 will clearly be very important if the Evas and Irons want to bounce back from their losses, and if other teams hope to continue their streak of upsets.

    Code:
    JungleBall Rankings - Week 9
    Rank Team W/L/T Win % Points Streak
    1 Geofront Evas 7-2-0 .778 794.00 L-1
    2 Termina Trip 6-2-1 .722 849.00 W-4
    3 Chiquita Bananas 5-4-0 .556 685.00 L-2
    4 Ubergorsk Irons 5-4-0 .556 677.00 L-3
    5 Del Monte Ranchers 5-4-0 .556 621.00 W-2
    6 Banana (HQ) Peels 4-5-0 .444 661.00 W-1
    7 Jerusalem Pickers 3-5-1 .389 688.00 L-1
    8 Timeline 3-5-1 .389 675.00 L-1
    9 Here It Is Winos 3-5-1 .389 638.00 W-1
    10 Apolytonia Archers 2-7-0 .222 766.00 W-1
    * W/L/T – Wins/Losses/Ties
    Crazy guys playing crazy game

    I met recently a quite unbelievable community not playing a democracy game, but a game toward democracy. It means that the government system follows strictly the development of the game. At the beginning, a member says I am the leader, and he is confirmed right away by acclamations, after he has scrupulously offered to any potential challenger to meet him privately, offer which was politely declined. He then becomes the despot in charge for one month.

    SUWIS (ShutUpWhenISpeak), the recently elected, described for the readers of the Jungle Gazette, in worldwide exclusivity, the extent of his powers, and how he governs his nation:

    SUWIS: I have been granted the powers necessary to lead a bunch of hungry, lazy and poorly minded sobs through the hardship of building a civilization, that is ALL the conceivable powers, without any control or limitation.

    EnOrmhOdOx : Wow ! That is cool !

    SUWIS: It is cool for them, not for me; I have all the worries, and them, they have just to do what I order them to do. They are even unable to own something, and I am obliged to consider as mine all the land, the cities and their production. Fortunately, under my exemplary leadership, some people have demonstrated that they could be of some help, and I allow them to take care, under my close supervision, of minor but time consuming matters; for instance, YATSB (YouAreTheStrongestBoss) is in charge of buildings and land improvements, and as a reward for helping me faithfully, I gave him a piece of land, with the benefit of everything it produces.
    Also, I needed an intendant to manage my properties, and I nominated NIMCTYB (NobodyIsMoreCleverThanYouBoss); I give him a salary per turn. I also nominated an Officer to maintain the Register of Properties, who receives a fee for each item registered or transferred.

    EnOrmhOdOx : And what about the military ?

    SUWIS: Even simpler. I decide everything, but I nominated CIKTA
    (CanIKillThemAllChief), for transmitting my orders to the units, and he will also receive a piece of land if he behaves well. In addition, I assign to each military unit one men of my personal guard. This man will enjoy or suffer the fate of the unit which bears his name; we do not speak of the
    2nd Spearmen or the 5th Archers, but of the UberKrack Spearmen and the
    Aggitate Archers. If the unit is wounded, its leader receives a piece of land; if the unit is killed, its leader dies with it; his wealth will be inherited by his son who will then participate in the game under the name
    UberKrack 2, showing to all that his family has accomplished the supreme sacrifice for the nation. In addition, when a unit find gold or a tech or a settler in a hut, the leader receives 10 gold coins, but nothing when fighting the barbarians. At last, he can become a great leader which will end his military carreer, and provided him with considerable rewards.

    The interview was abruptly interrupted because the month term was near the end, and SUWIS wanted to keep the job but was not sure at all that he will succeed. In fact, a new despot would certainly confiscate all his wealth, common practice between despots, and he can only save his gold coins; for this reason he was probably selling at bargain price all his land properties, farms, factories and stores.
    Asking some questions around revealed that the closest aides of the fallen despot would share the same fate. I learn also that their wise men will begin soon to research a totally new kind of leadership and organization named Feudality.

    If you want to know how this strange community finds its way toward democracy, read the next issue of the Jungle Gazette: The crazy guys become aristocrats.

    -- EnOrmhOdOx

    Like the Gazette? Consider a subscription!, and let us bring the Gazette to you.
    Last edited by Martin Gühmann; October 6, 2012, 19:04.
    Civ 3 Democracy Game:
    PTW Game: Proud member of the Roleplay Team, and Ambassador to Glory of War
    Intersite PTW Game: Member of Apolyton

  • #2
    *RESERVED*
    **nothing else for tonight, but it's possible one very small article will be inserted here tomorrow. This is uncertain as of now, so please consider the Gazette complete unless something is posted here**
    Civ 3 Democracy Game:
    PTW Game: Proud member of the Roleplay Team, and Ambassador to Glory of War
    Intersite PTW Game: Member of Apolyton

    Comment


    • #3


      Meshelic breaths a sigh of relief. It is done. Yes, it is done.

      great job on the last minute rushes adaMada, if it weren't for ada i think the gazette may have been delayed significantly longer.
      Former Supreme Military Commander of the Democratic Apolyton States, Term 8
      Former Chairman of Apolyton Labor Party

      Comment


      • #4
        [loud exclamation] MY BANANA LEAF IS BACK! AND NOW IT'S ON PAPER, TOO![/exclamation]

        E_T
        Come and see me at WePlayCiv
        Worship the Comic here!
        Term IV DFM for Trade, Term V CP & Term VI DM, Term VII SMC of Apolytonia - SPDGI, Minister of the Interior of the PTW InterSite Demo Game

        Comment


        • #5
          *plays the apolytonian anthem*
          Eventis is the only refuge of the spammer. Join us now.
          Long live teh paranoia smiley!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Tassadar5000
            *plays the apolytonian anthem*
            What is that, btw? Did we ever establish one?
            Long-time poster on Apolyton and WePlayCiv
            Consul of Apolyton from the 1st Civ3 Inter-Site Democracy Game (ISDG)
            7th President of Apolyton in the 1st Civ3 Democracy Game

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Arnelos
              What is that, btw? Did we ever establish one?
              We did. I had forgotten about that...

              Comment


              • #8

                Glad to have the Gazette finally back.
                "Close your eyes, for your eyes will only tell the truth,
                And the truth isn't what you want to see,
                Close your eyes, and let music set you free..."
                - Phantom of the Opera

                Comment


                • #9
                  For future information, any comments/constructive criticism on this issue? Do people like the Jungleball scores table? In the future, if we were able to cover more small events with short, one paragraph articles as above in addition to a more normal slate of Gazette articles, would that be liked? Do people like the pure storytelling of UnOrthO's last gazette, a pure news format, or a mix as we see here?

                  Basically just looking for any comments as to what people did and didn't like .

                  -- adaMada
                  Civ 3 Democracy Game:
                  PTW Game: Proud member of the Roleplay Team, and Ambassador to Glory of War
                  Intersite PTW Game: Member of Apolyton

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Yes, and it wasn't what was posted in that thread, either. It was Day-O.

                    And what unsung hero was the guy who suggested it?
                    Empire growing,
                    Pleasures flowing,
                    Fortune smiles and so should you.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Good work guys.
                      Note: the Law Offices of jdjdjd are temporarily closed.
                      "Next time I say something like 'lets go to Bolivia', lets go to Bolivia"

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        At the time of this report, nobody has announced their candidacy in opposition to Thud. It is not known if the loss of Thud’s adopted brother, Duddha, in the latest French campaign, has had anything to do with his decision to join in the way of the blade. Thud was unavailable for comment. Duddha remains missing, and is presumed dead, despite rumor that he is currently living in Ninot’s Mansion with Joan de Frog as his wife.
                        lol
                        Duddha: I will return...
                        Arnelos: ... and the civilizied world shudders ...
                        "I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. That, or Duder. His Dudeness. Or El Duderino, if, you know, you're not into the whole brevity thing..."
                        Free California!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Bump... I wanted this back on the front page
                          If you're interested in participating in the first Civ 5 Community Game then please visit: http://www.weplayciv.com/forums/forum.php

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Great to have the Gazette back up and running.
                            "Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."
                            --P.J. O'Rourke

                            Comment

                            Working...
                            X