How much does audio quality affect the appeal of a vocal recording?

[Al B. Sure!]

Regardless of your flow, delivery etc...If you have something to say..keep rapping...don't let anything hold you back.

The thing is I have to be oriented towards style over substance. I have backlogs of meaningful stuff but that's not what's important. What's important is being stylistically astute so people want to listen to your stuff. What good is having something to say when your means of saying it is so wack, no one wants to hear it?

I think the ordering of my words is what is problematic. I've always approached writing with no regard to a beat and concentrating entirely on the rhymes themselves... as a challenge to rhyme as many syllables as I can and keep a rhyme going regardless of 'pattern'. But the non-rhyming syllables in every line matter and have to have a rhythm of their own. Also, the scheme matters... the rhyming pattern has to be borne out; not just end abruptly because I went a line too long trying to rhyme. When I listen to a beat, I could scat to it... but when I write something, I get so constrained by the rhymes and punch-lines that it would break the pattern I scatted. I'm thinking the scat better represents how I'm supposed to flow.

[Al B. Sure!]

The one you gave a B to, what was the best sounding part flow-wise? I'm betting the second half because of how you compared it to "Definition".

It sounded better probably because I rhymed so many syllables in rapid succession. I need to learn how to have rhythm in words beyond the rhymes... and structure the non-rhyming parts of my lines to have that rhythm.

Phonte from Little Brother has a verse on the song "Whatever You Say" where he doesn't even rhyme. He rocks the beat without even rhyming. I need to figure out how he does that. He listed things a lot in that verse so that might have helped. There's a natural rhythm to lists, I've noticed.

[Al B. Sure!]

Okay, I got some rough stuff. Just want to get some feedback if I'm on the right track. Your help is appreciated, Pax, and whoever else.

I'm going out of complete left-field with this but, inspired by Phonte's non-rhyming verse, I've been 'rapping' everything from news articles to the instructions on toothpaste bottles. Obviously, without rhymes and without rhythmic structure, this sounds retarded but I think it may help me understand what flow is and develop it.

What do I mean? Well, I took an article posted on Apolyton and rapped it over a beat

This is the article that DinoDoc posted:

A local family watches their home burn to the ground and just a few feet behind them, firefighters watch, too.

It's happened multiple times before in one local community: firefighters refuse to respond because the homeowner didn't pay a fire subscription fee.

The last time this happened, the city of South Fulton, Tennessee, received a lot of heat nationwide for this policy. That was more than a year ago but nothing has changed.

The mayor said it comes down to simple business. If they don't collect fire fees, the fire department can't survive and if they make exceptions to the rule, no one will ever pay the fee.

Besides that, he likes the "pay for spray" policy and said it's fair.

But that's hard to stomach when you've just lost your home and everything you've worked for.

Here's my 'rap' of it:

http://snd.sc/tcDMdK

I know it sounds retarded but if I can develop a rap flow on something that structurally is not for rapping, it may help.


I also rapped a draft of a verse over the same beat. Tell me what you think about the delivery on this one (the last few lines of the verse feel off and I'll probably change them):

http://snd.sc/v1WqZc

Thanks

[Al B. Sure!]

bump

[Al B. Sure!]

Something about video games over Meek Millz "I'm a Boss" beat:

http://soundcloud.com/ramseya/im-a-boss-gamer-anthem

[C0ckney]

some lines need some work, for example "i'm coming har(d)...we can spar" just doesn't work.

sometimes the low quality of the recording is very noticable.

[Al B. Sure!]

some lines need some work, for example "i'm coming har(d)...we can spar" just doesn't work.

sometimes the low quality of the recording is very noticable.

Not sure how that doesn't work. It's both assonance and an oblique rhyme.

What about 'better boss', 'best get off', 'already lost', 'Sephiroth'? None of those are perfect rhymes.

Thank you for checking it out.

[Tupac Shakur]

How many people have to criticize your poor rhyming skills before you'll accept that it's something you need to improve rather than something to be excused away as "assonance"?

I don't even know what the **** assonance is, but I damn sure know that "hard" and "spar" don't rhyme.

[Tupac Shakur]

Still valid!

2. Your rhymes are lazy and sometimes non-existent; definitely need work. Rhyming "bag" with "bag"? Really? You do know that "bag" rhymes with "swag", right, which you use in the chorus and never rhyme with anything? "Fresh" and "death" don't rhyme, and you don't have the skills to make them seem like they do.

[Al B. Sure!]

How do hard and spar NOT rhyme? AR! Same sound in both!

Guess I need to scrap the whole thing because none of 'better boss'/'best get off'/'already lost'/'Sephiroth' are true rhymes... neither are 'Fatalities'/'Mad at me'... 'Blazkowicz'/'laugh a bit'/'masochist'... 'nazi'/'zombies'...

Hell, practically the only true rhyme in the whole thing is 'moblin'/'goblin'.

Rap is not limited to true rhymes.

Earlier, you gave props to the beginning of a different song where I said:

I think I'm going to have to leave,
Think they coming after me,
Like the snake in Genesis, Chapter 3,
All I see, in these tenements, the evidence of apathy,

Gah! Genesis/tenements/evidence aren't true rhymes! Neither are have to leave/after me/chapter 3/apathy!


My usage of rhymes (polysyllabic and internal) is my strength.

For comparison, the beat I used for the video game song is from a Meek Millz song. Meek Millz raps in the original:

Look I be riding through my old hood, but I'm in my new whip
Same old attitude but I'm on that new ****
They say they gon' rob me, see me never do ****
Cause they know that's the reason that's gone end up on a news clips


Like let's get real. His rhymes are ass compared to mine. He just makes it popular because of his delivery.

[Tupac Shakur]

How do hard and spar NOT rhyme? AR! Same sound in both!

That's not how rhyming works!

My usage of rhymes (polysyllabic and internal) is my strength.

This may be true given your myriad other weaknesses, but that doesn't mean your rhymes don't need work. They do.

Rap is not limited to true rhymes.

It is if you don't have the skill to rhyme words that shouldn't. Few people do; you most definitely do not.

[Tupac Shakur]

I think I'm going to have to leave flee,
Think they coming after me,
Like the snake in Genesis, Chapter 3,
All I see, in these tenements, the evidence of apathy,

Fixed that for you.

[Al B. Sure!]

I know poetic devices. I've explored this. You don't even know what assonance is.

You want to pretend to be 2pac. Here's a part of 2pac's 'Strugglin':

Three deep in my Jeep chief run with the Young Gunz
Strugglin and strivin, that's how the dough come
Now get gunned by the one with the gun for the low goal
Throw a bolo so low when I flow yo

low goal and bolo aren't rhymes! How does he rhyme guns, come, gunned, and one? Those aren't rhymes either!

[Al B. Sure!]

The vocal sample on the song I was using was "Have to leave", not flee. I needed consistency.

My second verse starts:

I think I'm going to have to leave,
Think they all have to read,
Book of James, Chapter 3,
And they gonna see, that the weak,

[Al B. Sure!]

2pac again:

I thought I'd bring a little truth to the young troops
I brought proof that the niggas need guns too

truth/troops/proof/too are not rhymes! Gah!