What Is The Biological Purpose For Early Morning Erections?

[monolith94]

To clarify, it's prostate. Prostrate is a position.

"His prostate proposition mentioned a prostrate position." English is a fun language.

In answer to the opening post:
a) it's perfectly possible to piss with a huge boner. I've done it with a real hard-on to rival all other hard-ons.
b) sex in the morning is great
c) no, just because you "use" your morning wood to have sex doesn't mean you have erectile problems in other parts of the day

[Elok]

After the events of this morning, I have only one word for this thread:

Inspirational.

What, you ran the morning sex-and-bacon gauntlet? It's nice to know we made a real positive improvement in the world, if so.

Us

[Hauldren Collider]

http://video.adultswim.com/robot-chicken/morning-wood.html

[Elok]

I don't think the order matters there, my friend.

Ehhh, I'm not so sure about that. I've been mulling it over, and I really do think that, for optimal results, the sex should precede the bacon. Couple of reasons:

1. Flow. You wake up, have some of that happy-sleepy dawn foreplay, get to the sex, let her hold you for a while until the oxytocin surge wears off, by and by you wash up and go out to the kitchen to fry the bacon. The other way around you have to go to the kitchen first, then go back to bed for the loving. Unless you have sex on the dining room table or something, which I guess has its charms but isn't always practical. Or comfortable. And damn, I wouldn't want to eat off that table later, would you?

2. More importantly, digestion. If you're going to be eating bacon, especially if you accompany it with eggs, buttered toast, what-have-you, you want a nice restful aftermath to digest it, say as you're driving to work. You dip the wick right after breakfast, you do it at risk of stomach cramps hitting as you reach orgasm. I've been there--not after breakfast specifically, but I've been there. You don't want to go there.

[Wiglaf]

OK not to break the ice here but you were a virgin until like a month ago. No one is buying it. I am not a cook but We need to not exceed our limits.

[giblets]

Elok, what's with the writing style?

[Asher]

He's an aspie.

[MikeH]

I took a big piss this morning but had no bonar.

Bonar is like sonar to detect people with boners?

[Bugs ****ing Bunny]

Bonar.

[Asher]

I haven't heard it called a boner since high school after we all got high watching Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. Congrats, Wiggy.

[Elok]

He's an aspie.

Damned straight. Gribbler, what about it? What I wrote there is not too dissimilar to the way I talk--I favor eclectic diction, among other things. Since, as Asher said, I'm an aspie, my public personality is necessarily something of an act (more than most people's, I mean), and the way I talk grew naturally out of that. Really it's just an extension of my pragmatism: I use words that work and don't bother about tone. Unless I'm writing for a specific purpose, and some inane crud on an internet forum didn't seem to merit that kind of effort.

[giblets]

Okay then. I didn't realize an entire paragraph could take someone less effort than something along the lines of "doing it after eating can cause cramps."

[Elok]

Oh, but just saying it that way would be boring!

[Sir Og]

Here is a real story (with pictures) regarding peeing and erections.

Last night I woke up at 4 o' clock with a big hard-on and almost bursting bladder. I ate some strawberries before going to bed and it seems that strawberries have very strong diuretic effect.

Peeing while standing was out of the question because I was half asleep and didn't want to make a mess.



Then I sat on the stool but realized that this will also make a mes.



The only solution was to lean forward ~ 45 - 60 degrees so that the stream path goes below the rim of the stool.



Peeing with an erection is a bit weird but is totally possible if you want to pee really hard.

[onodera]

Haha, you pee like a woman, Sir Og.
Behold.
For our blind readers:
1. keep your legs straight
2. spread them wide
3. simultaneously lean your ass back and your torso forward
4. use one hand to prevent your penis from jerking upwards
5. use your other hand as a counterbalance if your ass is too heavy